Newbie Sorrows

Holy hell....I know this has been mentioned before, but how in God's name does a newbie get started. I can contact a lady and as soon as I mention being a newbie the communication immediately stops....I feel like im just out of college again looking for a job....lol....no job if you have no experience....but gotta get a job to get experience. Almost amusingly frustrating.....any advise from the regulars would be appriciated. I've been staying away from bp as it has been mentioned here several times, but it seems like the ladies from the review sites are harder to communicate with.
stupendous's Avatar
Its been an eye-opener for me also. I just assumed you throw some cash out and get whoever you wanted. NOPE! Its almost like a small clique here.
satan666's Avatar
there is a post in this thread by skbinks with many newbie friendly providers on it hope this helps get your feet or d*** wet!

http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?...ewbie+friendly
Old-T's Avatar
  • Old-T
  • 02-23-2016, 06:59 PM
Its been an eye-opener for me also. I just assumed you throw some cash out and get whoever you wanted. NOPE! Its almost like a small clique here. Originally Posted by stupendous

Some suggestions from an "outsider".

You post contains some telling items:

"throw some cash out" Obviously this is a business for the ladies here, but for most of the good ones it is not strictly about making money. It is about making money safely, and hopefully enjoyable--or at least not unenjoyably. The issue of screening is first and foremost an issue of safety--for both of you. A lady who is compromised becomes a risk to you as well. So screening is about making the lady feel safe about seeing you. Safe that she will not get into any legal trouble, and safe that she will not wind up one-on-one with a psychopath. If you do not have references, you need to find the ladies who have screening based upon other things--knowing enough about you & who you are that they feel you are safe. This can be difficult--some guys have real concerns about letting too much info be known about them. It takes work to find a lady whose screening criteria matches your risk tolerance. You cannot reasonably expect her to assume all the risk. One valuable tool is to consider joining P411. Yes, you will have to give them real info about you, but that one time gives you access to a wider number of ladies after that.

"whatever you wanted". Screening or not, references or not, that is a notion best thrown away as fast as you can. Each lady has boundaries. Some have a lot, some have few. But paying their price does not give you the license to cross those boundaries. Some of this may be safety, but more likely it is the "enjoyable" piece I mentioned above. This is "screening for compatibility", and the onus falls more on the guy for this one--though the better ladies will do some of this as well. They want to enjoy the date, and they also know that if there is compatibility you will likely enjoy it better as well, and thus increase the chances you will be a repeat customer. This is where reviews come it. Once you have been screened for safety then it is often easier to have some discussions with the lady to further determine compatibility.

"like a small clique". That may be for some participants in some communities, but for the vast majority I have not found that to be the case. Once you have been deemed "safe", i.e. passed screening, then the "clique quotient" drops tremendously.

Check the link referenced above. Join P411. Do your homework. And you will be one of the "in crowd" quicker than you imagine.

Stay safe out there.
My advice as someone who is was a newbie a couple months ago, and still a newbie to some, is find a provider who is newbie friendly, and go. Maybe that provider isn't want you want or your first choice, but just knock out a couple good references and your in.

The traveling providers seems to me to be a little more accepting of newbies. Find somebody that posts an ad on here and go. And as stated earlier there is a list of newbie friendly providers, it's way out of date but still a couple still around.
DallasRain's Avatar
I am semi newbie friendly...if you are willing to part with other pertinent info

good luck!!
Thank you all for the advice....and very well put Old-T. I completely agree there are things that are necessary.....but they do become frustrating at times.
Took me a while to get things going too. Being newbie sucks.
There are a few newbie friendly providers here. Start with those to kick start your hobby. ))
Welcome BTW
LOL WTF Frankie ????
Its almost like a small clique here. Originally Posted by stupendous
It is exactly a clique of participants who value safety. Unless I have missed my guess, that is a very good thing.
Unique_Carpenter's Avatar
It is exactly a clique of participants who value safety. Unless I have missed my guess, that is a very good thing. Originally Posted by scorpio31
And, the guys take care of the gals, with the gals taking care of the guys, and it works very well.
Consider posting more frequently and actually establishing a board presence.
As seen above, contact Dallas Rain. She is an amazing woman, and will help you and rock your world! Assuming you meet her requirements.
I'm newbie friendly and also reference friendly
Emmie as well,
She was the first girl I saw on Eccie, and she is very laid back, very easy to talk with, and makes you feel comfortable.

Also will note, very good experience and good menu choices.