Married but hobbying

Philhelm's Avatar
Give her my number, K? I'll suffer through that shit for a while. Originally Posted by showmeyours
Be careful what you wish for.
Gotta agree with Sherm, here.
The only thing I remember about marriage was that fore-play was a half hour of begging. In fact my dog learned to beg watching me try to have sex with my wife.
Sens55's Avatar
Hell if I want sex on Friday I've got to start sweet talking her on Monday. It doesn't help that I travel & she works weird hours. Throw kids in the mix (not now...the kids are awake!) And I. Get it as regularly as I get a haircut.
fml's Avatar
  • fml
  • 03-28-2011, 12:15 PM
And I. Get it as regularly as I get a haircut. Originally Posted by Sens55

same here,,, but I'm pretty much bald... and when I do trim what I have left, I normally just do it myself...
+1 to VitoKC!!
Gramps111's Avatar
when it's all you get and it becomes pretty mechanical (after 23 years - min once per week) things get a very stale. It also isn't great to have it implied that I'm lucky to get even it! So.....now I've entered the hobby...AM I GREEDY?

NOTE: she's a perfect wife in every other respect....really a cool person but has just lost interest. I feel that my outside exploits will hold an otherwise great marriage together. Originally Posted by matthelm
Many of us are in the same boat...
I love my wife... but like a sister/companion...
family is important to me... and divorce would forever affect relationships that are very important to me...
But ... I probably should have pursued that years ago.
There is no intimacy at home in my life. I seek and find it with my ATFs.
Love/intimacy of the one hour variety is much better than having none at all.
Hobbying keeps me sane...
Personally, I seek intimacy more than sex...
There are special providers I've had the privilege of knowing over the years that have been caring and responsive... that have filled that void in my life.
BUT.... if I ever get caught (and as careful as I am..
it's probably inevitable)... hell hath no fury...
and I know that I will be the asshole and my wife..
will assume no responsibility.
Life isn't fair for us guys... Is it too much to ask
for what we yearn more than anything in this world:
being in the arms of a responsive, attractive woman?
Sens55's Avatar
I've said several times that hobbying has probably saved my marriage. My wife is fantastic in every area except the bedroom. If I didn't get some on the side, I'd probably have gone nuts by now. And I don't want the emotional entanglement of a mistress. So hobbying fits the bill nicely.
Longermonger's Avatar
You guys know what you signed up for when you said, "I do". Sinners.

Thou shalt not...

...or be damned to hell, right?

I at least hope you guys learned that guilt is a woman's favorite weapon. The way to defeat the guilt trip is to make her feel guilty for trying to make you feel guilty.

Bitch won't put out? Double down! She say, "Not tonight.". You say, "Not for TWO nights". She goes for a week without taking care of her husband...you make it TWO weeks. Confiscate that vibrator and destroy it. No more electric toothbrush either. You've got to be able to leave the table, too. Just like negotiations when buying a car. If you hear something you don't like...just say "OK.", walk out the door, get in your truck and drive away. If she calls your cell phone don't answer. If she asks where you were when you get home, tell her the truth...but make it sound fishy.

The thoughts that you want to generate in her head are; "Oops, I fucked up!", "That didn't work out like I planned it.", "I can be replaced.", and an uneasy feeling that she doesn't know what you are doing.

I bet some of you guys have wives that KNOW you're fucking around on them. She just won't let you know that she knows because it would screw up her family/lifestyle and she would lose the power of GUILT.
MuffLuver's Avatar
Longer - wow PsyOps on the misses! Don't get me wrong, I admire the idea but I am way too lazy! Getting a little on the side makes me happy (always), keeps her happy (I am not begging too often) and keeps us both happy with the occasional play time together that we do have. The only thing I have to work hard on is discretion.
i812-)'s Avatar
Men and women see things differently in a relationship.

Men see women and think I want to hit that pussy.
Women see men and say I want to hit that wallet.
So a compromise is made (marriage) where men pay for sex.

Oh wait isnt that prostitution???
Kudos to Gramps111; could not have expressed it any better myself. Well said, indeed.
Sens55's Avatar
Longer, give that a try and let me know how that works for you.