Before we knew any better...funny stories

Many of us began the hobby with no guidance, references, intel...OK NO CLUE! Tell us a crazy, funny, or scary story of your beginning hobby experiences. This could be from either a provider's or hobbyist's POV.

Allow me to start:

I started on Craigslist "Casual Encounters", not having a clue what I was doing. I saw some women looking for a generous man and decided to try it myself. My screening was limited to several "getting to know you" discussions and perhaps a photo exchange.

I had a guy ask me to meet him at a rest stop where he worked. He begged me to see him, but the problem was he had no cash. He offered me a gun in exchange for sex....at a rest stop! OK, yes, I am serious! I could have been a lifetime movie subject. He was totally serious and saw nothing wrong with it. Afterall, I COULD pawn the gun for $300. LMAO

Come on, tell us your story.

This sounds like it will develop into a fun thread!! Heidi, you should have accepted the gun, then given it back to him-bullets first!!!!!! LOL

One client (somewhat of a newbie) asked me flat out what my revenue was in the hobby. I was surprised he asked me that and he was being serious. I said ,"Well, that's kind of a personal question. How about you? What is your revenue doing your job?"
I guess I am telling HIS funny story. He didn't realize it was funny/weird to ask that...but it was in my eyes.

I had a nut offer me a laptop....a used one at that lol. Then there was the doofus who said if I fked him I could have the extra bed in his room for the night when touring. Ummm hello idiot, you don't think with the money I make I can pay for my own hotel? Why on earth would I want to sleep in a guy's room I have never met! Talk about stupid!

One time before an overnight....like 30 minutes before it........I was brushing my teeth while listening to music.(holding my tonguebrush like a mic, don't judge me lol) , and I made a mistake an hit my tonsils with my tongue scrraper while I was cleaning and vomited in the hotel bathroom and sink area. The lady was coming to see me an was luckily running late.. I thought about cancelling the appointment and offering something, but I really needed her as a ref to see a chick I was really anxious to see who required 3 refs. I also didn't want to flake out or cancel the overnight on short notice.

Well this lady actually came early and was watching me go in and out my room from her car, maybe precautionary. I told her I was getting extra towels......which wasn't a lie.....but I was really getting rid of anything that I had vomitated on lol.

You think that's bad...I actually threw up ON a guy!

You think that's bad...I actually threw up ON a guy! Originally Posted by London Rayne

Just one?

Worst Hobby Day EVER!

http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?t=232097

Gosh now that I think of it mine is too embarrassing to share. I guess I'll take it to my grave.

You think that's bad...I actually threw up ON a guy! Originally Posted by London Rayne

Because of his huge schlong?

You think that's bad...I actually threw up ON a guy! Originally Posted by London Rayne

Ugh.. I have to tell you what happened to me yesterday. A phone call is overdue. I damn near threw up but of course I had to be a good little provider *barf!*

Because of his huge schlong? Originally Posted by Casanova69

No...because he was gross! It was extra chunky too!

No...because he was gross! It was extra chunky too! Originally Posted by London Rayne

TMI! Disgusting.

Did I tell you about the brown shower freak? That's another thread lol. I made 5k and he got a face full of corn, peanuts, and extra jalepenos. I am quite the sadistic b3tch when it comes to wacky requests.

Omg....I asked for funny not disgusting! Omg London your ass pic will never be the same!

Surely there are some funny stories about providers also.

Ha ha ha! I put that punk on blast....literally lmao!