American Women and Getting Paid

What I think Leah is actually implying without actually saying it, is "all women are basically whores" and men should compensate them for everything to keep the relationship going. The more a Man spends on a Women the more he will respect her and she will respect him less. Isn't that right Leah. Originally Posted by acp5762

You have got to be joking.

Big obvious reality on this board - a lot of you guys are married, and I'd be more than surprised if you didn't spend a lot more money on your wives than on your escort friends. Often for a hell of a lot less, or you wouldn't be here.

So you think your wives are whores because they appreciate and accept your financial input?

Once again, I agree with some of what you say but not all.

You have not been observing this planet at this time. Or any other time on this planet either I am pretty sure. Disagree strongly!

The richest women mostly get that wealth by marriage, sometimes through inheritance.

Agree

An illusion arose front the feminist movement that women could 'have it all' - love, marriage, work, kids, wealth. All at the same time. All whilst, as Nina's notes, women's perceived value and attractiveness in society is going down.

Agree

'Having it all' - as defined above - is totally exhausting and not possible. What happens with the poor saps who try that is that they get totally exhausted/ill, and the guy very often cheats/leaves.

Mostly agree

Personally I believe those are too many areas of life to cover well. 100% agree And it's more than often noted that successful men don't actually desire successful women too much. Huge variables

Women are still vastly underpaid in relation to men in the same work. agree...though with*

I don't think the object is for the sexes to be and operate the same, but to complement each other.agree When you get the sexes being too much the same - as you do in American culture - you get very sexless relations. if you are saying we do not have time for sex, I might just agree.

I see that a lot with younger men and women in America. Very unsexy.I am not versed enough to offer up a yea or nay Originally Posted by Leah Ireland

You have got to be joking.

Big obvious reality on this board - a lot of you guys are married, and I'd be more than surprised if you didn't spend a lot more money on your wives than on your escort friends. Often for a hell of a lot less, or you wouldn't be here.

So you think your wives are whores because they appreciate and accept your financial input? Originally Posted by Leah Ireland

+1

So, I thought that's what feminism was about: having a strong, independent woman who brings home the bacon?"? Originally Posted by Can I Play Too???

Where would you ever get such an odd idea from? That's just a wussy guys fantasy.

I agree with Nina that things are different in Europe with regards dating.
First of all we don't "date" in the way that Americans do...and I'm not sure where I sit on that. In the initial throes of dating here, "dating" is seen as something of a selection process...but it can involve a few people during the selection stage (which is why it's called "dating" right?)...but it can get a bit tricky. In Europe (or at least the UK) that's not acceptable. Take a woman on a date and don't take any other woman on a date until you have decided what you are doing with the first woman. If you are sticking with her, no more dates with anyone else. If you are not sticking with her, let her know before taking anyone else on a date. No crossover allowed...one at a time...

That said, I find American men generally more chivalrous on a date. They seem to put more thought into it than their English counterparts. In England a date is much more casual... C x Originally Posted by Camille

I agree in England you don't multiply date at the same time, but then I don't get dating anyhow. I very quickly know if I'm interested in someone and I think men also do too. 'Dating' seems to me a lot of messing around for nothing - extra attention? You either get in a relationship or don't, and it's said we know pretty much immediately who a person is when we meet them and if we want to deal with them. We just don't go with our gut feelings a lot of the time.

Re. dating in England being so casual - well it wasn't for me, but then I lived in London and tended to meet many more rich men than I meet in Miami, and there was a lot of flashing of cash and I loved it! Still, I still have those kinds of dates in Miami. And no, I haven't noticed it being a one sided thing. Important point - men don't flash the cash if they're not happy.

Good thing I have plenty of cash!


Laurentius, how do you suppose poor people date now days? According to you and Lina and a few others a poor man and a ugly woman don't stand a chance.
Originally Posted by WTF

One word: alcohol!

[QUOTE=Leah Ireland;1181850]

So, I thought that's what feminism was about: having a strong, independent woman who brings home the bacon?"

Where would you ever get such an odd idea from? That's just a wussy guys fantasy. Originally Posted by Can I Play Too???

I take it that you haven't dated too many American men under (or at least have mental/emotional capacities of) 35?

Where would you ever get such an odd idea from? That's just a wussy guys fantasy. Originally Posted by Leah Ireland

Leah, I completely agree with you. Gentlemen ask a woman out, and pay for the date. And, ladies graciously accept this and say thank you. There is no quid pro quo of dinner = sex. I find so many women have no self-respect. Funny thing, for me it was this part of my life that gave me self-respect. I have never been treated as well by any men in my life than the men I have met through this world. So thank you, to you gentlemen, who know how to treat a lady. I love you all!

You misquoted me. Below is the entire quote.
Originally Posted by WTF

No, you cheeky git, I didn't misquote you...I picked a specific part of what you quoted. YOU are talking about one chunk of text, whilst I'M talking about another. There 'aint no "some" in my bit geezer...only yours.
Back to you bending over......or maybe tomorrow. I'm tired tonight and off to bed. Night xxxx

btw...WTF, you realize that I'm mostly just toying with you to see how many different conversations you can have in one thread right lol

I agree in England you don't multiply date at the same time, but then I don't get dating anyhow. I very quickly know if I'm interested in someone and I think men also do too. 'Dating' seems to me a lot of messing around for nothing - extra attention? You either get in a relationship or don't, and it's said we know pretty much immediately who a person is when we meet them and if we want to deal with them. We just don't go with our gut feelings a lot of the time.

Re. dating in England being so casual - well it wasn't for me, but then I lived in London and tended to meet many more rich men than I meet in Miami, and there was a lot of flashing of cash and I loved it! Still, I still have those kinds of dates in Miami. And no, I haven't noticed it being a one sided thing. Important point - men don't flash the cash if they're not happy. Originally Posted by Leah Ireland

Leah, I completely agree with the confusion of dating. It took me ages to get my head around how different it is here. I find it more stressful generally and have really only got involved with someone who I have been friends with first. It just works best for me that way.

By "casual" in Europe, I mean less rigid than here. There seems to be a lot less "got with the flow and see where it takes you both" here than in Europe...it starts with a slower and more comfortable ebb and flow rhythym...where here it starts in 5th gear lol. I think we are more accustomed to the intensity building over the other side of the pond, where her it's more intense from the beginning. Just different I guess...

Finally, I couldn't agree more with your conclusion about "having it all." It might be possible to have slithers of each slice of the pie, but to have each (full) slice that adds up to the whole is darn near impossible.

Hugs

C xx

Can I Play Too??? - "I take it that you haven't dated too many American men under (or at least have mental/emotional capacities of) 35?"

Actually I have - although 30 tends to be my upper age limit. They still pay for taking me out, but I tend to call them 'bootycalls' because they don't believe in taking care of their women - or their children usually. Hey, this is Miami.

Big obvious reality on this board - a lot of you guys are married, and I'd be more than surprised if you didn't spend a lot more money on your wives than on your escort friends. Often for a hell of a lot less, or you wouldn't be here. Originally Posted by Leah Ireland

I'm not currently married. I wouldn't be unfaithful to a wife or committed relationship SO. Ever.

So you think your wives are whores because they appreciate and accept your financial input? Originally Posted by Leah Ireland

No - but, in my opinion, this is the exact ethos your original post is advocating. Which is what we've been discussing.

And I wouldn't want a woman I'm with to feel that way either. Not unless she has made the choice to make it her profession.

When you phrase it that way, it seems ugly doesn't it?

If it's a date, I agree the guy should def pay. That's how they show their care and appreciation. As far as the regular ol bills go...I don't want anyone paying for me day to day because I need to be able to tell them to kiss my ass at any given moment! But I do have a very close, and wealthy, friend/lover who is always there when my back is against a wall. All I have to do is text 'Uncle' and he will make a deposit. That's a very nice thing to have, and again, his way of showing that he cares for me.

I remember asking a Philippino girl in Hawaii how she and her military boyfriend handled their money and she said
"It's quite simple. My money is my money and his money is OUR money!"
That cracked me up.

But I am pretty much with Beyonce:
"The clothes I'm wearing: I bought it!
The car I'm driving: I bought it!
The house I live in: I bought it!
I depend on me."

I'm wondering, which is the chicken and which is the egg.

Things are just a bit more subtle than one opinion or another...primarily becaase we are all individuals, and we all fall short of doing what we're supposed to do now and again.

Historically, the gender roles had the man feeling special because his woman admired him for bringing home the bacon...protecting her from harm...acting chivelrous towards her...etc. The woman felt special becuase the man admired her for being femine...percieved to be more of pure thought...steady and grounding in the relationship...etc.

The last several decades have had those roles blurred...with women doing a lot more (or at least sharing more) of the historically man things...and men doing a lot more (or at least sharing more) of the historically women things. There is, of course, nothing wrong with the blurring of those roles. But if that blurring leads to women or men not feeling special in their relationship?...then trouble is on the horizen. A mate can say that it is each person's own responsibility for feeling special...and to some extent it is...but such responsibility does not relieve the mate of the responsibility of making their mate feel special.

In the hisotric gender roles, I think that ability to make the mates feel special was easier. In today's world of blurred gender roles I think it requires more imagination on both parties part. As such, being somewhat unimaginative, I tend to go for women who lean towards the more historic gender roles...cause I'm more of the historically gender roled guy. Guys and gals who want to blur the lines a little more?...need to seek each other out.