Slap Your Mamma, Cheaters Never Prosper

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Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say...

6) Checkmate.
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Full List of Stuff White People Like

March 4, 2008 by clander

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Full List of Stuff Asian People Like

oh come on.. you're killing me. I'm just waiting for the blacklist
I love #14 on the first list

#14 Having Black Friends
January 21, 2008 by clander
From guest contributor Kristen Warner

Since we are on the verge of electing a black president, it seems important to explain why white people want black friends. Every white person wants a black friend like Barack: good-looking, well-spoken, and non-violent. Obviously, whites want black friends so as not to appear racist (see earlier Obama post). However, if we dig deeper what we notice about white people is not if they have black friends but in fact, how many black friends they have. White people like numbers. They like to count things like stars in the sky and the death toll at Mt. Everest and the number of times they’ve seen Tori Amos and/or Phish in concert. Counting the number of black friends is then clearly a divine imperative. The number of black friends white people possess also illustrates their comfort with black culture. Here’s a handy guide to the number system:

1—The white novice. This black friend is the gateway to helping white people understand gang signs and Vietnamese beauty supply stores. This black friend is probably the only black friend for many white people and when they all hang out (because white people hang out) they bring their “mutual” black friend with them.

2—The white black club-goer. Two black friends serve as bodyguards when white people go to black clubs to see how exactly one “pops, drops and locks” it.

3 -4—The white BET-er. See Justin Timberlake/ Robin Thicke/ Jon B for more information. For old school reference, see Michael McDonald.

5 and up—Impossible.

And I thought Susan liked me because I was cool..
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careful where you park your car...
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Damn, only 17 huh? lol.. but so true

#3 Their Mama
February 22, 2008 by thinkb4ublink
To black people there is a unanimous number 1 girl in their lives, their mama/momma and black people don’t just like their mama, they LOVE their mama. A black person’s mama is always the primary supporter of each respective black person, and black people love their mama for it. This love does not carry over to your mama though. They do not like your mama.
Black people like their mama so much that they will very rarely talk back to her. Black people know that their mama wants what is best for them, and will thus do their best to keep mama happy. Whatever you do, do not… I repeat DO NOT make a black mama angry, it will almost certainly result in very adamant, unreasonable, and quickly spoken outbursts that you will not want to be on the receiving end of, let alone be able to understand. Even if mama is wrong, black people will not talk back to them as they are very experienced with these “outburst’s” and will do most anything to avoid them.
If a black person talks back to his mama it is very likely that they will later write a song or poem about them, as a form of apology, but mostly to honor them and all they have done. Black people have numerous songs about mama and all that she has gone through to get her song made. Examples of this include 2Pac’s Dear Mama, Snoop Dogg’s I Love My Momma, James Browns Mother Popcorn, Kanye West’s Hey Mama, and Jay Z’s Blueprint (Momma Loves Me). These songs best describe the love that black people have for their mama. In stark contrast, the white hip hop musician Eminem, feels quite the opposite about his mama, as seen in his song Cleanin Out My Closet.
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# 1 Making Fashion Statements

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Why is it none of the lists had "sex"?
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Gay headbands
Why is it none of the lists had "sex"? Originally Posted by boardman

because you didn't post the things Mexicans like.. just sayin
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So black people only like 17 things? Seems kind'a racist.