This may open me up to some ugly replies, but here goes.
Out there, somewhere, is a good guy who will accept you without reservations.
Honesty is the key, and maybe the answer is looking at someone you've seen professionally. I'm not suggesting actively using your sessions to screen potential suitors, but if you find a guy who seems as interested in you as they are the sex without coming off as a creeper, then maybe there's a chance. Guys who go to providers recognized that sex and feelings need not be exclusively dependent upon each other. And a guy who you know sees providers has no place to pass any kind of judgement on you as a provider beyond how good you are in bed. Just make sure he's single.
Personally, if I were to meet a provider who I REALLY seemed to click with beyond the sex, then I would be more than open to the idea of going on a couple of no-sex dates to see if the non-physical attraction is real. From there it's a matter of mutual trust. My first wife wasn't a provider, but did have several other lovers while we were married that she openly let me know about so I knew she was safe, without going into the intimate details. I had the option of doing the same, but rarely felt the need. We were together 9 years, married 7, and when we split it was for other reasons and very amicable, infidelity never came up in the divorce, and we remain friends to this day.
I do the hobby thing now because I'm lonely and feel socially awkward, but occasionally feel the need to get laid. I'm a nice guy, fairly attractive, good career, just shy around women I'm attracted to. It's easier to relax and talk to a pretty woman when you're not afraid of making a misstep. And once you've been intimate with someone, it's easier to carry on other conversations.