Suicide & the holidays

FirePhoenix's Avatar
Sometimes it's just best to understand that good and the bad made you who you are today. Be the owner of it and not let it be the owner of you.
Everyday is a depressing one especially living in an overcrowded city with two faced backstabbing people.
Suicide is only a negative to those that are left behind. Intstead of condemning a person for doing it (Which is a selfish reason for those left behind) does it ever occur to them that those who choose to leave may be happier leaving this physical world to want to live the spiritual world?
TemptationTammie's Avatar
Cloud coverage, lack of sunlight and many more causes.
When depression is so severe to cause a person to contemplate, or actually attempt suicide, they don't think about how they are going to be once they die. They don't think about how it will affect others. Those are the last things on that person's mind. They only know the pain they are going through and that they don't have the strength or will to go on.
Sometimes even mundane chores or routine become too hard for the person to fulfill or accomplish. Sometimes even getting out of bed can take all the energy that person has.
Guest121917-1's Avatar
I agree this past was not the easiest. It was the forst without either of my parents. It took everything to decorate for Christmas and I couldn't take it down fast enough.
I had a hard time getting back into my daily routine after my mini went to her dad. Divorce and kiddos are hard to deal with especially during the end of year Holidays.
Im never to short of a phone call if anyone ever needs to chat!!!

Happy New Year!!!
FirePhoenix's Avatar
To tamc no those left behind never think of it that way. In many ways they are the truly selfish ones. They all think that if "went to a counselor,take meds,see how much people need you,blah,blah,crap". They don't understand the the pain,hurt,fear,sadness, or the need for the release into the stage of whatever we go to. If a person hasn't truly wanted to take that ultimate step for ending of being in this world then they have no compassion or understanding of such an issue and therefore it they who are the most selfish.
Shadowsinthedark's Avatar
Yes... dealing through martial arts training. It's the only thing I've found to help me. Father's Day gets really tough for me though and it's coming up.
FirePhoenix's Avatar
Having to deal with a loss of a child is the hardest issue to deal with durning the holidays. One of my top favorite 3 song is "Time in a bottle" by Jim Croce for that very reason. Hopefully you can dust of those memories and enjoy them with a painfully sad smile and forget the rest of the day.
Its the most selfish thing you could ever do. Your family and kids will blame themself.


Suck it up and get help and meds. Get your shit together.

I'm speaking from experience. I know someone that had a family member do it. And fuck him for doing it!
FirePhoenix's Avatar
Kicks,what is the biggest mistake a family does with a member that feels that their time is up? The family talks at the person or over the person. Generally when a family says think about what it will do to them, the person will only think that's it's best for the family. It's best for the family to acknowledge whatever pain their loved one has and say it's ok to have that pain. Step 1 in saving a life, is to sit down and listen to that pain for what it is.
Kicks, you know someone that had a family member take that step. You are an outsider looking in. Your perception is based off of your outrage for your friends grief and hurt and not whatever the issues were for that person.
Thing is that all the problems someone is going through will pass. Kill yourself over a broken marriage? What about the kids? Now they have a broken family and a dead parent.

Kids need to have their hand hold and forced to get help if their in that situation. Adults need to do it themself. I have no sympathy for an adult with "pain" that tries to do it to themself.

I feel like you may be hinting at something. You should go and get help. Nothing is worth doing that. The pain will pass.
Shadowsinthedark's Avatar
Kick rocks... funny name... You've obviously never been there yourself from what you've said. The route you take and tactics you use to get your point across only makes those with issues feel worse and believe themselves to be flawed. Not everyone does or even has the ability to think like you. Suicide is a choice made out of desperation, isolation, and hopelessness. When you ask "what about the kids?"... many people going through these issues truly believe themselves to be a burden on those they care about. And most times those families are not equipped to understand and therefore help a suicidal person. Getting help is a great suggestion, but following it up with telling everyone that you have no sympathy for them negates any suggestion you make. On top of that not everything works for every person. As for myself I have been depressed since childhood and I have seen doctors have been on medication, seen psychiatrists and therapists. Most medications made things worse and most therapists give little more than an "mmmhmmm". It wasn't until picking up on martial training that I found something to look forward to tomorrow about. I'm speaking as a one who's brother attempted suicide. As someone who has attempted myself. Had multiple friends and extended family end their own life. And as someone educated in psychology, healthcare, and pharmacology. Once again... suicide, while you think it is selfish, is really the last act of a desperate person. I suggest you maybe take some courses in psychology to better understand how someone with suicidal ideation thinks differently than you. And please have a nice day.
Shadowsinthedark's Avatar
Having to deal with a loss of a child is the hardest issue to deal with durning the holidays. One of my top favorite 3 song is "Time in a bottle" by Jim Croce for that very reason. Hopefully you can dust of those memories and enjoy them with a painfully sad smile and forget the rest of the day. Originally Posted by FirePhoenix
Thank you for the kind words
Shadowsinthedark's Avatar
Thing is that all the problems someone is going through will pass. Kill yourself over a broken marriage? What about the kids? Now they have a broken family and a dead parent.

Kids need to have their hand hold and forced to get help if their in that situation. Adults need to do it themself. I have no sympathy for an adult with "pain" that tries to do it to themself.

I feel like you may be hinting at something. You should go and get help. Nothing is worth doing that. The pain will pass. Originally Posted by Kickrocks
As an example:
How you believe a suicidal person thinks... "I'm sad, why won't you be with me, please pay me some attention, if I do this you'll be sorry."
And while that certainly has been the case at times....
How they actually think.... "they would be Better off and happier without me. I just screw everything up eventually. If I do this right at least I can leave them the insurance."
Just something to ponder.
Shadowsinthedark's Avatar
Having to deal with a loss of a child is the hardest issue to deal with durning the holidays. One of my top favorite 3 song is "Time in a bottle" by Jim Croce for that very reason. Hopefully you can dust of those memories and enjoy them with a painfully sad smile and forget the rest of the day. Originally Posted by FirePhoenix
Just as an FYI... the song for me is "pass slowly" by Seether.