What is the difference

Well, we all know that once wedding cake passes the SO's lips all BJs end.

However, why does all sex end when a child is born?

Well, we all know that once wedding cake passes the SO's lips all BJs end. Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

Well duh, don't serve wedding cake.

not to mention the post-coital experience and feelings

2 women, 30 years of marriage. Second one was Satan on Earth. (Glad she's gone.)
The sex was mind blowing with [both]. There wasn't anything we wouldn't try with or for each other. The first wife was even better because real love was there. A provider may be hot, maybe fuck like a rabbit but they can't compare.

So the BJ's stop after the cake is funny but just a myth.

What a great post. I agreed with all of what you shared except for the line above. Please know that I am not trying to speak for other women, just myself. I feel like my dates are very GFE. I feel lucky that I have clicked with about 85% of the men that I have seen. I will admit though, Ansley can't give the same experience that I would give a SO. With a SO there is love, trust and not to many boundaries. When I have those three things it really does take sex to a whole different level. Originally Posted by Ansley

That's why I say 'should' Ansley. No one situation is perfect. And mostly I'm not talking about us keeping up with the SO's. If sex with SO's were half the way they were with providers, there would be less of a need for providers.

Half of the things we do behind closed doors, women were told that wives don't do. And the other things that men desire, they don't tell their wives about anyway for fear of rejection. And that's IF they're getting any. A lot of women are holding out because of menopausal issues, or sometimes, a gent hasn't/cant restore her full trust after a past indiscretion. I often wonder about women like this. But they already know it's 'cheaper to keep her' so they don't worry about divorce, but still aren't concerned with his happiness either. What do they expect a guy to do?

I, on the other hand, as a single lady with no SO (and not getting any outside the hobby either. When I'm a provider, I'm a provider. When I'm in a relationship, I'm in a relationship.), actually look at this as having a temporary SO's, and I not only seek to fulfill his needs but mine as well. I can close my eyes and enjoy every moment of the encounter. To me, the encounter is purely carnal, and primarily about yielding to that carnality. No performances, just us two making the best of the time we have. You think too much during sex beyond safety it messes things up. We start happy, we leave happy.
The only difference is I'm not worried about all the other stuff that having sex with a guy in the civvie world brings. No questions about why he didn't call, or his/my whereabouts, and hacking into Facebook accounts and phone records. No yelling matches and headaches- boy I feel really lucky actually.

If you've got someone in your life that knows all your freaky secrets, fulfills all your fantasies, and still loves your dirty drawers, please keep her/him. If you've found someone that you trust implicitly, this person is a rare find indeed. Consider yourself lucky.

Difference has not been much. While I was in a long-term relationship I was monogamous and the sex was most excellent. Now single I found that the sex tends to be better with ladies that I see on a regular basis; a one night deal has some great excitement and sex to it but the repeats are where a certain amount of trust can develop and as Ansley noted trust makes a difference.

Difference has not been much. While I was in a long-term relationship I was monogamous and the sex was most excellent. Now single I found that the sex tends to be better with ladies that I see on a regular basis; a one night deal has some great excitement and sex to it but the repeats are where a certain amount of trust can develop and as Ansley noted trust makes a difference. Originally Posted by discreetgent

Interesting. I haven't been with any one provider more than once.

I will admit though, Ansley can't give the same experience that I would give a SO. With a SO there is love, trust and not to many boundaries. When I have those three things it really does take sex to a whole different level. Originally Posted by Ansley

I completely agree with your statement;

Love: A provider's job is to bring pleasure to her patrons, she doesn’t have to be aroused to perform sexual acts, she doesn’t need to feel love between herself & her partner, no need for foreplay & she can act as if she enjoys it and please forgive my ignorance some providers do fake it, even if she don't feel good with the patron, a 'professional' provider' will look as if she feels great during the session, she may not tell the truth, she just wants to get her job done. For a wife, there has be mutual pleasure in sex, she needs to feel love from her SO during the process, she may voice out if she doesn’t enjoy it & may suggest how you can work together to improve on things,

Trust: If one thing has been made clear "Time After Time," it's that providing is a very dangerous profession and safety is number one priority for any lady seeing a stranger for the first time. So it’s safe to assume the difference between trust with SO and feeling safe with a client. Providers trust their SO but they need only to feel safe with their client which is a degree of trust.

Boundaries: I think it takes longer visits and willingness to repeat many times to feel comfortable around someone and negotiate the boundaries. But could you elaborate a bit more about what boundaries separate SO from client because this is the main purpose of my question. It’s OK if you feel you don’t need to post it in public, I was just asking……

Excellent post Tiffani, thank you…..

Interesting. I haven't been with any one provider more than once. Originally Posted by Marcus Aurelius

You dont know what you are missing.

I'll agree with PJ on this. There's a lovely sense of comfort re-meeting a provider that both enjoy each other's company. Granted to meet someone from here you are almost already old friends before you open the door.

Granted to meet someone from here you are almost already old Originally Posted by SR Only

So are you saying that we are all old?

I completely agree with your statement;

Love:

Trust:

Boundaries: Originally Posted by Lucky40

I am going to plead the 5th for most of your post. I will say:

I really do love sex.

I'll agree with PJ on this. There's a lovely sense of comfort re-meeting a provider that both enjoy each other's company. Granted to meet someone from here you are almost already old friends before you open the door. Originally Posted by SR Only

While I obviously agree with that there are at least 2 reasons (I am speaking generally, I have no idea what MA's reason may be) I can think of why someone might choose to not repeat.

A. Variety is the spice of life
B. Not wanting to risk making a connection

This leads me to pose this question “what is the difference between provider/SO in terms of fulfilling your sexual needs? And for providers “what is the difference between client/SO? Originally Posted by Lucky40

As far as the occasional visitor and the new gents or one time dates, it's not much different then a one night stand or the early phases of a dating relationship.

I find the differences between SO and patron are obvious in long term arrangements.

My gentlemen callers are more eager. They go to such great lengths, without my asking or expecting anything, to create these fun ad sometimes extravagant experiences. Everytime we get together it's a celebration of what we share.

They're more adventurous. There isn't the same investment or tie to the future or personal lives, there's less a fear of offending me. They're happy to try new things, invent new experiences. I've been seeing two gents for years and they still manage to think up new sexual experiences while with SO's that stops after the Honeymoon phase and may occur once every few years.

Sad to say - the way they look at me. In their eyes of my Donna I always feel beautiful, there's a glitter, a sparkle, that isn't always there with an SO. Mostly because I don't see him every day. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. My Donna might be distracted by work and personal life problems while we're together but they don't overshadow me. I'm there because he wants a distraction from those things. It doesn't usually work that way in an SO relationship. His troubles will overshadow me, and I can't blame him for that. Often when he's going through a hard time, the best thing I can do is leave him alone, give him sapce, talk when I'm spoken to (I mean that in a nice way not a mean controlling fashion).

The things I can share with them - I've been in a long term relationship where he knows that there's no chance of me retiring. I am very private and guarded about my experiences as a companion, especially the good moments. He doesn't request this, but he himself is monogamous, and it can't be easy on him. So I do my best to be considerate of his emotions. However, this is a really big part of my life. It's created a little isolation chamber around me, of things I can't talk about, experiences I can't share, emotions I have to figure out alone, thoughts I need to put a muzzle on. However, with my Donna I can talk about my life, without any consern (obviously not details that should be kept private, but general stories and experiences). Its so nice not to have to shove this huge part of my life into a closet.

When I've spend as long as a week or two with a Donna, there is also an awareness there that doesn't exist in day to day life with a live-in SO. A constant concern for my comfort, doting but not to the point of suffocation, just a sweet desire for me to be happy in little ways. With an SO we're not going to do that - not a bad thing, but you grow into daily life and don't notice every detail. I don't notice that he's missed lunch and might be hugry, he doesn't notice that I'm fidgety and might need a plesant distraction for a bit. Everyday demands take over your line of sight.

What a great post. I agreed with all of what you shared except for the line above. Please know that I am not trying to speak for other women, just myself. I feel like my dates are very GFE. I feel lucky that I have clicked with about 85% of the men that I have seen. I will admit though, Ansley can't give the same experience that I would give a SO. With a SO there is love, trust and not to many boundaries. When I have those three things it really does take sex to a whole different level. Originally Posted by Ansley

Agreed and that's why I like to use the word "Donna". There's a huge difference between a client and a Donna. Donna = Patron of a Geisha. Geisha have only one Donna at a time, and they play a major role in her life. I usually have 1 or two at a time that see me frequently over years. Once I was balancing three which made meeting new people almost too exhausting a proposition lol

Donna are regular part of my life, even when we aren't in the same room or country. After sharing years together, good times and bad, we do achieve heights that are generally left for personal life, including trust. Admittedly, it's not terribly common, but it does happen.


Awesome post:

Then you have to think about the provider, who should be versatile enough to sense your needs from communications. But let's talk about mismatches in personalities. Let's take our guy who may be a bit shy and forming a connection is key to enjoying his time with a provider. If he books "Miss SuperPSE" it's possible he may not take from the encounter what he expects. Or if "Mr. Jaded-about-women" meets "Miss Sensitive GFE", who wants to get to know each other when all he wants to know is how far can she get his thing down her throat, he may think she's a little slow to the punch about his needs. Originally Posted by Tiffani Jameson

I think often in long term live in relationships (7+ years), as you hurt each other over the years (accidentally and intentionally), as family, friends, careers complicate things, as you both change internally over the decades you've shared together, both parties put up walls in the name of self preservation. Incompatibilities that didn't bother you before drive you crazy 10 years later. New incompatibilities rise as you both grow and evolve. Somehow you become best friends and parents more then lovers.

For some people, lack of commitment and expectation provides a soaring freedom that's impossible in the civ world. Even the fact that we don't share the same core friends, don't spend time with each other's families makes a huge difference.

So are you saying that we are all old? Originally Posted by Ansley

I would perfer to think not old but more refined and expressive than those of a younger mindset and perspective. We're all teenagers at heart.