Nerves Getting the Best of Me..... Suggestions?

terrier16973479's Avatar
Good thread Ranger Frog!
Happens to the best of us! Great suggestions on here! Try what you think will help and if it don't, well, try something else.
The only thing I'd add to all the good suggestions is ask the lady to do things that worked for you in the past, like, say, with your last or a prior girlfriend.
Just a thought.
txtracer's Avatar
(For the TL;DNR version, skip to last paragraph)
So after seeing a few ladies from here, a recurring issue has reared it's ugly head, Junior doesn't seem to want to cooperate. I know that it isn't a medical issue (he works just fine when alone), so this clearly to me is just a psychological problem. I am trying to come up with some ideas as to how to get over this, and two ways came to mind. My thinking is I could either go with a long and relaxed session so as to simply take my time and not have too much pressure, or I could do the opposite, a shorter session with the intensity level cranked up to 11 so I literally have no time to think about it. There are issues with both however. With the longer session, if it doesn't work out early on I think the frustration levels might start to rise and ruin the rest of the time, plus it would be a bit expensive. For the more intense version, that may be a bit hard to find as getting true intensity from someone requires some physical attraction, and considering I look like Quasimodo's taller cousin that is going to difficult to find.
In conclusion, to anyone who has had this problem or know of someone who did, is there a good method to help alleviate this nervousness issue? Any suggestions would be helpful, I'm desperate enough to be posting it on the forum. Originally Posted by Rangerfrog09
Don't know if it helps but you're not alone. I'm in the same boat. Even the blue pill didn't help. 100% mental.
Hardcore Happy's Avatar
I suffer from this. Here is some real advice. The key is to force the boner and vent the anxiety. It's taken some experimenting, but I found the solution, at least for myself.

1) Order the blue pills from the Indian pharmacy. I use alldaychemist.com, they have them listed as Manly. They are very cheap and I cut them in half.

2) Stop eating several hours before your appointment. Like, seriously only eat 1 small meal long before your date. Don't even drink more than what it takes to get that meal down. Lesser the better. Take the half blue pill about 2 hours before go time. Longer the better, you will be good to go most of the day after dosing. This "forces" the boner.

3) Sooth the nerves with moderate alcohol usage. You will probably know the right amount already. Just enough to make you feel "loose" and talkative, but not so much to be "drunk". Think 4 beer buzz. Takes a lot of the edge right off. This kills the anxiety.

Last bit of advice. You will know you're good when you take the pre-appointment shower and you are thinking about the provider and/or looking at her pics and straight getting super jacked/hard with minimal hand attention to self. If that's the case you will have it made, no probs. =) I don't have low sensation so I'm able to complete w/o issue, but the final release may be a bit diminished due to all the blood pressure up there I guess. At least you will get to feel like a stud and experience the woman though, as opposed to getting the damned "look". And oh man what a relief that will be.
I suffer from this. Here is some real advice. The key is to force the boner and vent the anxiety. It's taken some experimenting, but I found the solution, at least for myself.

1) Order the blue pills from the Indian pharmacy. I use alldaychemist.com, they have them listed as Manly. They are very cheap and I cut them in half.

2) Stop eating several hours before your appointment. Like, seriously only eat 1 small meal long before your date. Don't even drink more than what it takes to get that meal down. Lesser the better. Take the half blue pill about 2 hours before go time. Longer the better, you will be good to go most of the day after dosing. This "forces" the boner.

3) Sooth the nerves with moderate alcohol usage. You will probably know the right amount already. Just enough to make you feel "loose" and talkative, but not so much to be "drunk". Think 4 beer buzz. Takes a lot of the edge right off. This kills the anxiety.

Last bit of advice. You will know you're good when you take the pre-appointment shower and you are thinking about the provider and/or looking at her pics and straight getting super jacked/hard with minimal hand attention to self. If that's the case you will have it made, no probs. =) I don't have low sensation so I'm able to complete w/o issue, but the final release may be a bit diminished due to all the blood pressure up there I guess. At least you will get to feel like a stud and experience the woman though, as opposed to getting the damned "look". And oh man what a relief that will be. Originally Posted by Hardcore Happy

This is fabulous advice from an experienced hobbyists and I think you could have some real success with this route...
Chung Tran's Avatar
This is fabulous advice from an experienced hobbyists and I think you could have some real success with this route... Originally Posted by Analeese
I don't think so.. 4 beers along with a Manly pill? I cringe at the thought of that combination.. sounds like saying "eat a huge meal right before bedtime, but follow it with half a bottle of pepto bismol"..
micktoz's Avatar
As I've aged and have a couple of injuries that make cumming a challenge, I mostly try to take the pressure off myself and have changed my outlook to the belief that shooting a load is not the goal. Enjoying the play, the intimacy, the touch is the goal. Most of the time I get a great release at the end (by my own hand), but sometimes I don't. But, I had a blast anyway.

I don't do dates shorter than 90 minutes and I've done quite a few 3somes. Some amazing tease and denial sessions by experienced providers are just what the doctor ordered. And then some bdsm thrown into the mix has made for some insane endorphins.

Laura Lynn and Kendall4U are excellent at giving a wonderful journey, they are talented and very patient. Above all they enjoy what they do.

Sit back and enjoy the journey.
Rangerfrog09's Avatar
I suffer from this. Here is some real advice. The key is to force the boner and vent the anxiety. It's taken some experimenting, but I found the solution, at least for myself.

1) Order the blue pills from the Indian pharmacy. I use alldaychemist.com, they have them listed as Manly. They are very cheap and I cut them in half.

2) Stop eating several hours before your appointment. Like, seriously only eat 1 small meal long before your date. Don't even drink more than what it takes to get that meal down. Lesser the better. Take the half blue pill about 2 hours before go time. Longer the better, you will be good to go most of the day after dosing. This "forces" the boner.

3) Sooth the nerves with moderate alcohol usage. You will probably know the right amount already. Just enough to make you feel "loose" and talkative, but not so much to be "drunk". Think 4 beer buzz. Takes a lot of the edge right off. This kills the anxiety.

Last bit of advice. You will know you're good when you take the pre-appointment shower and you are thinking about the provider and/or looking at her pics and straight getting super jacked/hard with minimal hand attention to self. If that's the case you will have it made, no probs. =) I don't have low sensation so I'm able to complete w/o issue, but the final release may be a bit diminished due to all the blood pressure up there I guess. At least you will get to feel like a stud and experience the woman though, as opposed to getting the damned "look". And oh man what a relief that will be. Originally Posted by Hardcore Happy
Umm well this is one option... my liver and kidneys may object to it though...
LustyBustyGina38FF's Avatar
Think 4 beer buzz. <<don't do this
.. guys who drink to much before have a hard time getting it up ... and we really don't need beer breath in our face ....

just relax before and don't over think it .. just let it flow
just enjoy the person you are with..
Hardcore Happy's Avatar
I said 4 beer buzz as a point on the spectrum of sobriety, you could definitely run vodka and sprite or something to greatly diminish the smell of beer or straight alcohol. Obviously you don't take it into whiskey dick territory.

As far as the damage of mixing a bit of alcohol with a half tab of sildenafil, psh that's nothing. You will only need to run it when you hobby with a new girl, and how often is that? Once a month maybe? The human body is resilient. Everyone knows there are risks in the hobby and this one of those that are absolutely worth taking to get the peace of mind knowing you will definitely get the experience you want.

Think about it man, do these folks that are replying have our problem? Do they know what it's like to be so close to something we want soooo, so bad only to get that close and not physically be able to? Every time? No matter how relaxed and "chill" you are? How easy it is for non-sufferers to denigrate a particular method and give their own advice.

A lot of girls will naturally become upset (understandable) and, as I'm sure you know, you will notice even if they try to hide it. Then the appointment turns into something you endure instead of enjoy and you get to think about the good money you just wasted the whole time and on the ride back. A teenage make out/ feel up session is not worth $200+, sorry. I know these ladies are extremely hot and how lucky we are that they make themselves available to us in this way, it's literally beyond belief. But... sorry.

Anxiety is a real and harsh thing my friend, but hey, at least it's not crippling depression. hah I don't post here, but I felt oh so compelled to because I know this issue and how (un)hard it makes things. I've done the legwork of bunk appointments and experimenting with ED medicine to know what works. Trust me, you can't just pop a pill on a full stomach 30 minutes or an hour before your appointment and go a'swaggerin' into that incall with a stranger and expect acceptable sexual function with the familiar specter of performance anxiety just waiting in the rafters. I'll never go see a new girl w/o the prep again.
Rangerfrog09's Avatar
I said 4 beer buzz as a point on the spectrum of sobriety, you could definitely run vodka and sprite or something to greatly diminish the smell of beer or straight alcohol. Obviously you don't take it into whiskey dick territory.

As far as the damage of mixing a bit of alcohol with a half tab of sildenafil, psh that's nothing. You will only need to run it when you hobby with a new girl, and how often is that? Once a month maybe? The human body is resilient. Everyone knows there are risks in the hobby and this one of those that are absolutely worth taking to get the peace of mind knowing you will definitely get the experience you want.

Think about it man, do these folks that are replying have our problem? Do they know what it's like to be so close to something we want soooo, so bad only to get that close and not physically be able to? Every time? No matter how relaxed and "chill" you are? How easy it is for non-sufferers to denigrate a particular method and give their own advice.

A lot of girls will naturally become upset (understandable) and, as I'm sure you know, you will notice even if they try to hide it. Then the appointment turns into something you endure instead of enjoy and you get to think about the good money you just wasted the whole time and on the ride back. A teenage make out/ feel up session is not worth $200+, sorry. I know these ladies are extremely hot and how lucky we are that they make themselves available to us in this way, it's literally beyond belief. But... sorry.

Anxiety is a real and harsh thing my friend, but hey, at least it's not crippling depression. hah I don't post here, but I felt oh so compelled to because I know this issue and how (un)hard it makes things. I've done the legwork of bunk appointments and experimenting with ED medicine to know what works. Trust me, you can't just pop a pill on a full stomach 30 minutes or an hour before your appointment and go a'swaggerin' into that incall with a stranger and expect acceptable sexual function with the familiar specter of performance anxiety just waiting in the rafters. I'll never go see a new girl w/o the prep again. Originally Posted by Hardcore Happy
Thanks for the suggestion, and trust me, I am aware of the horribly uncomfortable situations that can arise, but personally I would rather try and solve the underlying psychological issue rather than rely on some drugs for a quick pop. Yes, it will probably result in some awkward moments, but I think that this way of thinking will be better in the long run. That's also why I was looking for help solving the nervousness issue, not necessarily the physical part of it, but I totally understand where you are coming from and appreciate all of the suggestions.
LustyBustyGina38FF's Avatar
May be just the right TEACHER is what he needs
learn your body and what works for you
maybe some SEX ED classes from some hot ladies ..
TheEccie214's Avatar
I had this issue when I started the hobby and what relaxes me was seeing the same ladies and building a comfort level they the stress of limited time and explaining your situation are not there it makes it easier. Also feel bareback makes easier if you've never used condoms in the RW.
pyramider's Avatar
A herd of goats can work wonders, too.
I bet if you took money out of the equation, you'd be very relaxed. Correct me if Im wrong.
TexTushHog's Avatar
You could talk to your internist. He or she might try you on a very light dose of benzodiaspines to be taken a hour before performance time.