Am I Happily Married If I Hobby Secretly?
YES!!!
m
- m5552009
- 12-17-2010, 04:53 PM
- Guest062124
- 12-17-2010, 04:58 PM
Your marriage is probably happier if you are secretly hobbying.
- Guest030911
- 12-17-2010, 05:03 PM
Ha! I am under my secret love. oops. Guess it is not so secret anymore. 
Good answers from the providers. I really like PMdelites disclaimer:
You are a man, therefore you are automatically wrong.
Please give me credit if you quote me or drop me in your sig line. Thank you.
Good answers from the providers. I really like PMdelites disclaimer:
i'm not a provider nor do i play one on cable tv. i do provide consulting fees to some women.... Originally Posted by pmdelitesUnder the same discalimer, I will add my 2 cents.
You are a man, therefore you are automatically wrong.
Please give me credit if you quote me or drop me in your sig line. Thank you.
- jafun
- 12-17-2010, 05:20 PM
Some do hobby just to have sex and be treated without any drama...
- Guest062124
- 12-17-2010, 05:31 PM
- Lana Warren
- 12-17-2010, 05:34 PM
Reeltalk,
Even though you may be very happy with the other aspects of your marriage, you're really not happily married! Something is missing in your relationship with your wife or you wouldn't be in the hobby! Sex is a human need and desire that we cannot live without.....without it, we cannot exist! My suggestion is for you to re-evaluate your life, your hopes, and your dreams! Be true to yourself and to her!
Even though you may be very happy with the other aspects of your marriage, you're really not happily married! Something is missing in your relationship with your wife or you wouldn't be in the hobby! Sex is a human need and desire that we cannot live without.....without it, we cannot exist! My suggestion is for you to re-evaluate your life, your hopes, and your dreams! Be true to yourself and to her!
- TexRich
- 12-17-2010, 09:26 PM
In my opinion, no.
- Black Sedan
- 12-17-2010, 10:24 PM
Reeltalk,
Let me weigh in on my experience. I had a wife who encouraged me to sample body rub girls. It was her idea in the first place. She wanted me to tell her about it too. She would know when I was going, and she would look at ads with me. I recall her asking me after I had visited several if they ever had sex with me, and I said, no I would never, just L1 (which I did not go farther than until we split). Perhaps that was disappointing to her... she was beginning a secret affair. So watch out guys, if the SO suggests it! I thought I had a happy marriage.
I encourage you to report back with more about your relationship.
All things being equal, I'd say the answer is no. 5 years ago I would not have given that response. I would have said swinging/open hobbying, could still co-exist in a happy marriage. I would have seen that as a sign of strength and security in a firm lasting relationship. Now I have a different opinion. If you are hobbying, and you think it is a happy marriage; then I think there's a high likelihood she is pretending to be happier than she actually is, even if you are keeping the hobby a secret. Something is stoking the desire within you to hobby for some reason.
I'm guessing you are asking this question because you desire a happy marriage. I take that to mean you love your wife, and want to grow old together, etc. I'd say take this as an early warning alarm going off. Whatever stimuli are influencing you to hobby; it may very well be subconscious.
Do the hardest thing you'll ever do. Go visit a counselor. Find one who isn't judging you for it. You should "shop around", try at least 3 for an hour each, even if you like the first one. I would recommend keeping THIS a secret, give it 8 sessions or so. Go with a goal, and state the goal to the counselor that you are trying to uncover if there is a serious issue in your relationship, or with yourself.
See if you can get to a starting point with the issues, if any. Then, if it makes sense, find a couples counselor (A DIFFERENT ONE than the one you see) Why?
1. She won't be ambushed, or feel like you and the counselor are keeping secrets from her in collusion.
2. The first counselor won't be motivated to "go out for business". You are there for an exploration.
3. The first counselor can be a great resource once he/she gets to know you to find JUST the right couples counselor.
Let me weigh in on my experience. I had a wife who encouraged me to sample body rub girls. It was her idea in the first place. She wanted me to tell her about it too. She would know when I was going, and she would look at ads with me. I recall her asking me after I had visited several if they ever had sex with me, and I said, no I would never, just L1 (which I did not go farther than until we split). Perhaps that was disappointing to her... she was beginning a secret affair. So watch out guys, if the SO suggests it! I thought I had a happy marriage.
I encourage you to report back with more about your relationship.
All things being equal, I'd say the answer is no. 5 years ago I would not have given that response. I would have said swinging/open hobbying, could still co-exist in a happy marriage. I would have seen that as a sign of strength and security in a firm lasting relationship. Now I have a different opinion. If you are hobbying, and you think it is a happy marriage; then I think there's a high likelihood she is pretending to be happier than she actually is, even if you are keeping the hobby a secret. Something is stoking the desire within you to hobby for some reason.
I'm guessing you are asking this question because you desire a happy marriage. I take that to mean you love your wife, and want to grow old together, etc. I'd say take this as an early warning alarm going off. Whatever stimuli are influencing you to hobby; it may very well be subconscious.
Do the hardest thing you'll ever do. Go visit a counselor. Find one who isn't judging you for it. You should "shop around", try at least 3 for an hour each, even if you like the first one. I would recommend keeping THIS a secret, give it 8 sessions or so. Go with a goal, and state the goal to the counselor that you are trying to uncover if there is a serious issue in your relationship, or with yourself.
See if you can get to a starting point with the issues, if any. Then, if it makes sense, find a couples counselor (A DIFFERENT ONE than the one you see) Why?
1. She won't be ambushed, or feel like you and the counselor are keeping secrets from her in collusion.
2. The first counselor won't be motivated to "go out for business". You are there for an exploration.
3. The first counselor can be a great resource once he/she gets to know you to find JUST the right couples counselor.
- Abraham
- 12-17-2010, 10:52 PM
Not happily, but Texas is a community property state.
- guest010712
- 12-18-2010, 12:37 AM
- sirliamscross
- 12-18-2010, 01:04 AM
Of course it's possible that you are happily married and still hobby.
And Lana, the only thing missing from some of our wives is the "strange" feeling of new pussy.
That's it. If our wives could turn into different people via some magic - and thus satiate our genetic need to spread our seed to multiple partners - then we wouldn't hobby.
Men are made this way. It's not tough to figure out that men can seperate sex from emotional connection. Thus, happily married (emotion) and the we grab some strange (genetics).
YES YOU CAN BE HAPPILY MARRIED AND FUCK OTHER WOMEN.
And Lana, the only thing missing from some of our wives is the "strange" feeling of new pussy.
That's it. If our wives could turn into different people via some magic - and thus satiate our genetic need to spread our seed to multiple partners - then we wouldn't hobby.
Men are made this way. It's not tough to figure out that men can seperate sex from emotional connection. Thus, happily married (emotion) and the we grab some strange (genetics).
YES YOU CAN BE HAPPILY MARRIED AND FUCK OTHER WOMEN.
- Prolongus
- 12-18-2010, 08:13 AM
- Boltfan
- 12-18-2010, 11:37 AM
- Gonzo DFW
- 12-18-2010, 07:42 PM
Seems to me Analisa and Reese Foster have it about right. Give what's required, take what you need. Life is simple; it's not easy.
- Roman Polanski
- 12-19-2010, 07:07 AM
I was married before. I never hobbied till the marriage was ending. At this point I was very unhappy with my current situation of being in a permanent relationship. I strongly believe in a monogamous relationship. If I had the person that fulfilled ALL my wants and needs why HOBBY????