Hey Fingerling. Welcome. This place is just like every other community, the more you hang around and get involved, the more people you'll get to know. That includes the ladies. They'll ignore you every time if you don't have references and they don't know you. They have to. What they do, opening the door to strangers everyday, is very dangerous. They are looking for a level of confidence and trust just like you are. With that established, I promise you that you'll find some fantastic, genuine people on here. Those who aren't quickly reveal themselves and you can ignore them.
Don't worry, it'll work out fine. We're glad you're here.