you know you're in trouble when your provider

True comment just this past Friday night.

I am on top of her and ask. "what are you thinking about"?

Her response, "what she was going to have for dinner at the Marriott".

We both laughed and went to dinner and then came back for the night.

LOL I was just making a joke .........and it SURELY was not about Lana and Vickie .I promise .......I thought of the guy at the bar ......he met a very pretty lady and bought her a drink ..she was very nice looking and well endowed for being close to 60 ....as they talked she asked him if he had ever had a threesome ..he said NO..but would love to try it out .....so they go to her car .and she drives him to her home ....when they walk in and start to kiss ....he has her almost undressed .....and She hollers up the stairs ....MOM do you want to come join us .....LOL .......

you know you're in trouble when your provider excuses herself to go to the bathroom, leaves the door cracked open a bit and you see her stand up to take a leak...

I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN I was in trouble when she promised me that she would not show that spy photo to anyone....and I believed her....and now this pops up

when she does this Originally Posted by bigdog0311

when, after asking what she likes about sex or what activity gets her off, she replies immediately and w/out a break in cadence ...

"none, i dont really like sex at all. i'm just doing this so i can save enough money so my son and i can move to florida."

this really happened to me at the courtyard marriott in jersey city, nj w/ an escort from a reputable nj agency. one of the most way less than deliteful encounters i've ever experienced.

Thats brutal!!!!!! Lmao

Ahhhh, its cute.
Make it dance.
Can I paint a smiley face on it.
Wow and your feet are so big.
Will it squeak if I squeeze it.
This explains your car.
Maybe if we water it.
But it still works right.
Maybe it looks better in natural light.
Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
Are you cold?
If you get me real drunk first.
Does it come with an air pump?
I guess this makes me the early bird.

Originally Posted by SweetAterPie

When, after undressing, you notice her dick is bigger than yours...

When she makes sure all activities are performed in front of a big beautiful wall mirror in her bedroom. And as you leave you hear her say, "That's a wrap..."

she turns on the TV to watch I love Lucy reruns as she starts your massage.

I was thinking the SAME THING!!! LOL! You beat me to the punch, Lana my dear! Originally Posted by vnurse

With a few notable exceptions I am a Charter and Lifetime member of the GMIF club and as of 08/10/2010 I became legit, yup first time Granddad, daughter had a baby boy.

Congrats LuckJack!!!

My absolute favorite is when a client tells me after DATY, that maybe next time I should PAY HIM for that! LMAO...



XOXO,
Italiana Princess

ItalianaPrincess- I'll pay you for some great DATY..

With a few notable exceptions I am a Charter and Lifetime member of the GMIF club and as of 08/10/2010 I became legit, yup first time Granddad, daughter had a baby boy. Originally Posted by LuckJack

ditto, congratulations on entering the next phase of your life.
and congratulations to your daughter and family.

grandkids are wonderful.


guys, do we need new acronyms for our profiles??

GPLF - grandpa that loves to f*ck
GPLS - grandpa that loves to have sex
GPLL -grandpa that loves to make love

i'd put all three in my profile.

GPLFG/M - grandpa that loves to f**k grandmas and moms
GPLFG/M/AW - grandpa that loves to f**k grandmas and moms and any woman

WOW!!! CONGRATS LuckJack!!!!! There's nothing better than being a grand!!!

On topic...

I don't recall ANY of my clients ever being in trouble when in MY room! I DID, however make an embarrassing mistake a week or so ago...

Gentleman comes in (FIRST visit to me), left his envelope in the bathroom. He gets his massage and is all relaxed after I am done with him so I offer to get him some water thinking he wil be dressed by the time I get back.

I go back in the room and he was sitting on the edge of the table (still undressed) looking around at my decor. I'm thinking, well, okay, how can I be subtle...I explain that I Have other appointments and that perhaps we should schedule more time on his next return visit.

He VERY politely and graciously tells me that he had paid me for 2 hours! OMG!!! I was MORTIFIED!!! I IMMEDIATELY had him lie back down, apologizing profusely and proceeded to try to get him relaxed again!

We had emailed back and forth a couple of times and in the exchanges, I had forgotten that he had originally requested a two hour appointment. He was a GREAT sport and very understanding.

I actually hope he reads this so I can apologize once again. I would LOVE to see him again! Oh well, I guess my old hagdom catches up with me now and again!

I guess one would THINK they are in trouble if they book a multi-hour appointment and she asks you to get dressed after an hour! LOL!