Ppl who enjoy physical violence during sex

Easy to see who's serious here and who isn't.

Lots of subjects lend themselves to humor, and I'm often first in line.

But this aspect of the realm is very serious, because the borderline between mutual pleasure grounded in pain and outright exploitation/abuse is so hard to define.

As long as no one dials 911 and everyone's happy, it's all good.

This sort of thing is unlikely to happen in p4p. You have to know and trust the person. But the intensity can be amazing ...

I left my last kinkathon with bruised nipples and a bunch of open handed face slaps. All in good fun.

I wonder if having a prior abusive experience would tend to want someone to desire this as a fantasy?

I'm not sure how rare it is, but I truly enjoy the physical aspects of BD. I'm not really into the psychological and degrading aspects, but I do appreciate a lady who's not afraid to really let go and leave a few marks. I love knowing that she's getting pleasure from possessing me and there's truly nothing like the sexual tension that builds from a sensual torture session. When nibbles turn to bites and caresses turn to slaps. The feeling of leather striking you with her first around your boys. A cane dragged across your cock before crashing into your ass. Yes, goddess. So much yes.

From a male dominant view, it is all about the sub giving control to their dom. This can be physical or psychological or both. Those who are pain sluts usually enjoy giving up control but also specifically enjoy the physical pain. There is a physiological explanation which is that pain releases endorphins in the brain, which are naturally occurring narcotics. It is believed that those who enjoy pain have an avid response to pain and produce a lot more endorphins, so much that they get a high from it what is referred to as the "sub zone". What is important to know is that a BDSM relationship is not about physical violence even though it involves pain; it is actually about love and pleasing your partner. In any case "safe word/phrase" must be agreed on before starting and no one will have to be outside their comfort zone.

I'm not sure how rare it is, but I truly enjoy the physical aspects of BD. I'm not really into the psychological and degrading aspects, but I do appreciate a lady who's not afraid to really let go and leave a few marks. I love knowing that she's getting pleasure from possessing me and there's truly nothing like the sexual tension that builds from a sensual torture session. When nibbles turn to bites and caresses turn to slaps. The feeling of leather striking you with her first around your boys. A cane dragged across your cock before crashing into your ass. Yes, goddess. So much yes. Originally Posted by stanky

I don't even understand it myself how one can become a switch. I said I would NEVER be a bottom. Now, I crave both....Sometimes at the same time! I REALLY enjoy BOTH sides, depending on the person and my mood.

I don't even understand it myself how one can become a switch. I said I would NEVER be a bottom. Now, I crave both....Sometimes at the same time! I REALLY enjoy BOTH sides, depending on the person and my mood. Originally Posted by Scarlett De Rossi

I'm right there with ya, gorgeous... I was introduced to BD play by an IRL GF who (eventually) confided to me that she was a professional submissive (actually, a switch, but I didn't learn that until later). I was *very vanilla* and had a fairly hard time coming to grips with the whole idea. Truth be told, I had already had to convince myself to get serious with her, because she was fairly alternative (tats, emo rockabilly look), but I really liked (cliche coming...) her personality, and we just clicked. So... after the initial shock, we stayed together and invariably we began incorporating different aspects (me topping) into our sex life, because that's what she enjoyed. I truly enjoyed topping, having always identified as a dominant Type-A personality. We eventually experimented with switching, and even "performed" at her place of employment a time or two. And at some point I realized that I enjoyed the submissive role much more than being dominant, especially when playing a brat. To ramble to a point, I too enjoy both sides of the play, and it does very much depend on the mood and partner, but I find myself missing the pleasure of bottoming much more than the pleasures of topping.

And to come to another tangential point, I wish that you lived closer...

I enjoy pain and intensity and I also love letting the Dominant exercise her sadistic side and let it fly!
So honest and intimate!

Used to have a GF that would restrain me, and would then smother me with her ass (or a pillow if she was riding my cock) for breath play, as well as slap me all over (legs, face, nipples) to go faster. Eventually she moved to nipple clamps and a chain to prod me towards moving sufficiently for her orgasm.

Would love to find something similar (along with other activities) in DFW...but it's difficult, considering that breath play with a client is a risk.

Those that "get it", just enjoy it with a willing partner. Those that don't spend a lot of time trying to figure out or explain WHY we are the way we are. Different strokes. No pun intended.

I'm right there with ya, gorgeous... I was introduced to BD play by an IRL GF who (eventually) confided to me that she was a professional submissive (actually, a switch, but I didn't learn that until later). I was *very vanilla* and had a fairly hard time coming to grips with the whole idea. Truth be told, I had already had to convince myself to get serious with her, because she was fairly alternative (tats, emo rockabilly look), but I really liked (cliche coming...) her personality, and we just clicked. So... after the initial shock, we stayed together and invariably we began incorporating different aspects (me topping) into our sex life, because that's what she enjoyed. I truly enjoyed topping, having always identified as a dominant Type-A personality. We eventually experimented with switching, and even "performed" at her place of employment a time or two. And at some point I realized that I enjoyed the submissive role much more than being dominant, especially when playing a brat. To ramble to a point, I too enjoy both sides of the play, and it does very much depend on the mood and partner, but I find myself missing the pleasure of bottoming much more than the pleasures of topping.

And to come to another tangential point, I wish that you lived closer... Originally Posted by stanky

Hot story. Yes- Usually Type A enjoy being submissive. The more out of control I feel in my personal life, the more I want to dominate and just be a sadistic bitch. Lol

I'm just an hour away from South Dallas. And I'm coming soon to stay in North Dallas for a few days. The only problem is I have no idea how I'll feel. Will I be feeling submissive or Dominant? Lol.

Honestly, I can only sub if my mind is there. I can always service top, but it's just way more fun if you are actually REALLY feeling it!

I guess we shall see!! Either way, I'm really looking forward to getting to play really kinky. Austin just isn't very kinky.... Kinky to my personal standards, anyway. Seems the scene is way bigger there in Dallas.

I wonder if having a prior abusive experience would tend to want someone to desire this as a fantasy? Originally Posted by crimson

I'm glad you posted this. It kind of made me take a step back and blink in somewhat of a stupor.

With that being said, I think it does...the mind is a strange, strange thing.

With the right person, at the right time, I LOVE being choked. There is nothing so amazing...so surreal...than the feeling of almost passing out and cumming at the same time. That feeling is incredible. You know what I'm talking about, right? When he's choking you, and you start to feel a little numb, and the only thing you focus on then is how you FEEL - the best cum ever. Hands down.

Full believer in "good pain" or "it hurts so good" .

I beat you because I love/desire you deeply...


(Not to be confused with just plain domestic abuse *lol*)

I don't understand ..yet.. the psychology behind it

Except that it feels right.. it feels good.. when you're with someone who likes wants needs it too

Or at least understands.. sees through you.. the affection behind it.


Psychological torture.. physical ...I love and employ it all

*cheers*

gotta love pain. its addictive ..giving and/or receiving Originally Posted by Zabrina Sarafina

I wonder if spanking would be included here? I didn't really know how much it turned me on until I had my first experience spanking a provider in a session. I was literally quivering with arousal. Haven't had one since but I will definitely continue down this journey of exploration.