The media plays a role, but it largely reflects the viewpoint of society. We live in a society that stigmatizes prostitution and especially prostitutes. This stigma helps maintain a check on the size of the prostitution sector, and it deters some women from entering the industry and some men from participating. Women on the whole are bigger opponents of prostitution, broadly speaking, than men. Married women see prostitutes as competition, both because the availability of prostitutes somewhat reduces men’s interest in marriage and because, once married, the availability of prostitutes reduces women’s bargaining power within marriage. Many laws and social stigmas seem designed to keep men from straying, and to the extent these social controls are successful they increase a woman’s bargaining power within marriage, as the wife becomes closer to a monopoly provider of (non-solo) sexual release. Stigmatizing prostitutes and loose women, and men who are ‘cheaters,’ helps maintain the bargaining power of married women.
Religion helps, as many religions from Christianity to Islam make prostitution a sin. Perhaps these social controls including religion arise from society’s desire to procreate and a need/desire to have men serve a nurturing role as providers for their children and not just sperm donors. Maybe a social need to keep men ‘at home’ and tied to wife and children is be a deeper cause of the stigmatization of non-marital sex in general and prostitution more specifically. Of course, social rules and religions are not absolute, and neither is behavior. Men who “cannot help themselves” are stigmatized but otherwise allowed to participate in society. Women who are sluts or, worse, prostitutes, are even more heavily stigmatized but put up with, as long as they know their place at the bottom of the social order. But I am not sure of this, as non-monogamous models of marriage seem viable as a method of keeping fathers in a provider role.
Even where prostitution is legal, at least in Europe, those working as prostitutes face stigmatization. Despite legalization, society still imposes this sanction on the prostitute, and to a lesser extent, on clients.
So no, I don’t think the media deserves too much blame. I blame society itself.
- davidsmith0123
- 02-09-2012, 08:18 PM
- DallasRain
- 02-09-2012, 09:10 PM
I have found that even though I am proud of what I do and how I have built a successful business.....it can be a lonely road at times.....I have to "hide" who i am in most of my real life...
{I have more friends in the hobby then I do in life}!
{I have more friends in the hobby then I do in life}!
- Pink Floyd
- 02-09-2012, 09:21 PM
I don't give a flying crap what the media thinks, and I wish the moralizers would all go to their imaginary hell. Thanks for all the fun girls I have met in the Hobby, you have made my life much more fun. I treat the women great and they treat me great. Who could ask for anything more. I lived my life by the book. I have been married 3 times and I raised 3 children. I don't need some pruneface prude telling me what I can and cannot do just because they don't know what life is about. Instead they believe that they can live forever if they take all the fun out of everybodies life. Eat, Drink & Be Merry!!
- DallasRain
- 02-09-2012, 09:31 PM
I don't give a flying crap what the media thinks, and I wish the moralizers would all go to their imaginary hell. Thanks for all the fun girls I have met in the Hobby, you have made my life much more fun. I treat the women great and they treat me great. Who could ask for anything more. I lived my life by the book. I have been married 3 times and I raised 3 children. I don't need some pruneface prude telling me what I can and cannot do just because they don't know what life is about. Instead they believe that they can live forever if they take all the fun out of everybodies life. Eat, Drink & Be Merry!! Originally Posted by FlectiNonFrangi
that was well said!
I like the quote--"those easily offended should be offended more often"!
- Cpalmson
- 02-09-2012, 09:36 PM
I agree with Shayla (go figure 
). We live in a very hypocritical society. From a media standpoint, I think a lot of it is based on pure ignorance. I don't think they know of all the subculture of what is considered prostitution. For them, they fixate on the stereotype-- streetwalkers with drug problems and pimps or girls on Craigslist. I mean the whole Eliot Spitzer episode showed their complete ignorance. They kept referring to the girl as the $3000 hooker. They never once attempted to delve deeply into her world. She was a hooker. That was all they needed to know. They simply glossed over the agency aspect of her activity and never once broached the idea of independent hookers who use the internet for business. To the media, prostitution on the internet begins and ends with Craigslist.
As for the hypocritical element, I find it amazing just how many activities that could be construed as prostitution are never seen that way. In some instances, society reverse stigmatizes the situation. Here are several examples. Girl wants a better grade or letter of recommendation from her teacher, she is willing to sleep with him. That could be considered a form of prostitution. But instead, society makes the girl the victim of sexual harassment. Come on now, she was willing to have sex for the better grade. That is straight up business 101. Second example, marriage. For financial security women will marry (have sex) with a man. It goes on and on. Face it, society has too many prudes when it comes to sex. Sure, prostitution is seedy. There's something dirty about it, but as long as 2 consenting adults want to do it, there's no need to outlaw it. Just keep it in the shadow. Just like the crazy uncle, we know he's there, we just tend to ignore him
). We live in a very hypocritical society. From a media standpoint, I think a lot of it is based on pure ignorance. I don't think they know of all the subculture of what is considered prostitution. For them, they fixate on the stereotype-- streetwalkers with drug problems and pimps or girls on Craigslist. I mean the whole Eliot Spitzer episode showed their complete ignorance. They kept referring to the girl as the $3000 hooker. They never once attempted to delve deeply into her world. She was a hooker. That was all they needed to know. They simply glossed over the agency aspect of her activity and never once broached the idea of independent hookers who use the internet for business. To the media, prostitution on the internet begins and ends with Craigslist.As for the hypocritical element, I find it amazing just how many activities that could be construed as prostitution are never seen that way. In some instances, society reverse stigmatizes the situation. Here are several examples. Girl wants a better grade or letter of recommendation from her teacher, she is willing to sleep with him. That could be considered a form of prostitution. But instead, society makes the girl the victim of sexual harassment. Come on now, she was willing to have sex for the better grade. That is straight up business 101. Second example, marriage. For financial security women will marry (have sex) with a man. It goes on and on. Face it, society has too many prudes when it comes to sex. Sure, prostitution is seedy. There's something dirty about it, but as long as 2 consenting adults want to do it, there's no need to outlaw it. Just keep it in the shadow. Just like the crazy uncle, we know he's there, we just tend to ignore him
- Guest070818-1
- 02-10-2012, 07:07 AM
Gotta love the media...
- alluringava
- 02-10-2012, 07:32 AM
- alluringava
- 02-10-2012, 07:36 AM
I have found that even though I am proud of what I do and how I have built a successful business.....it can be a lonely road at times.....I have to "hide" who i am in most of my real life...I definitely agree it can be isolating. And when I tour of course you have to keep a low profile and avoid the nosy people who inadvertantly can cause you some trouble at the hotels.
{I have more friends in the hobby then I do in life}! Originally Posted by DallasRain
My neighbors and none of the people at my gym know what I do, and I can't exactly just tell aquaintances " Oh yeah by the way I'm an escort." They just wouldn't understand. As I said I thank God I have the closeness with my parents, and they know, as do some very close friends, but I don't and can't divulge what I do to others. I think it's because inevitably, my parents will be the ones who are judged. Like, people would think " What kind of parents could they be if their daughter is an escort?" And I just don't want to put that on them. So with the exception of one cousin no one in my immediate family knows either.
I sometimes listen very carefully to aquaintances' opinions about sex workers and it's almost ALWAYS negative. And so I know that I wouldn't want to ever reveal anything to them. My two good friends are actually providers themselves, and the handful of civvie friends think I solely get my income from personal training.
- dilbert firestorm
- 02-10-2012, 07:59 AM
anyone remember Dr. Detroit?
- DallasRain
- 02-10-2012, 09:05 AM
Dilbert---do tell........
- Roothead
- 02-10-2012, 09:37 AM
"all things in good measure" - letting the media, religion or anything/anyone else unduely influence your perspective and/or behaviors is, IMHO, not a good thing.... too many of the issues and crisis's the we have today are a byproduct of single minded thinking and the weakness/apathy of the masses to focus actively disagree.....
That said, the providers I have met so far, fall into the following categories:
1) beautiful/fun/sexy (Duh!)
2) bright - if not book smart, then at least "street smart"
3) engaging - they have a life, responsibilities and are by most standards "normal"
Therefore, regardless of what the media may try to portray, my experience leads me to another perspective - we are all pretty much the same - all trying to make it as best we can and trying to take care of the ones we love....
That said, the providers I have met so far, fall into the following categories:
1) beautiful/fun/sexy (Duh!)
2) bright - if not book smart, then at least "street smart"
3) engaging - they have a life, responsibilities and are by most standards "normal"
Therefore, regardless of what the media may try to portray, my experience leads me to another perspective - we are all pretty much the same - all trying to make it as best we can and trying to take care of the ones we love....
- pinchy
- 02-10-2012, 11:52 AM
OP: what are you trying to say? something like: "Look at all these TV shows showing escorting as a bad thing[tm] , nothing ever bad happened to little ol me!" ..."cept that one time I had to wash myself off in lysol after seeing mr stinky pants!".
:P
:P
- Laz
- 02-10-2012, 10:16 PM
Can you imagine the reaction if the media portrayed that the business does not have to be bad and a person can make a high income working part time hours. People would be horrified and condemn the media outlet and millions of women would think about the money.
- alluringava
- 02-11-2012, 01:24 AM
Can you imagine the reaction if the media portrayed that the business does not have to be bad and a person can make a high income working part time hours. People would be horrified and condemn the media outlet and millions of women would think about the money. Originally Posted by Laz
I hadn't thought about that, but it's true. Perhaps what I should have said was that the media itself is influenced by already negative stereotypes and deeply ingrained values society has about the adult industry.
- B.Wayne
- 02-11-2012, 05:16 AM
To answer the question directly, I say yes it does. The majority of people will only see or read of the horror stories, and the way movies,tv portay the women is sleazy,lieing,trashy, dirty, uneducated whores. I know this movie gets mentioned alot but pretty woman sort of broke out of that alittle after the beginning of the movie. Granted there are females that do fit just that description above, I can think of a few right now...(who have threatend and bullied,intimidated someone I care about)...BUT that is not the majority, or I would like to think that is not the majority. I will admit I had to do a ton of research in order to make sure I did not get ripped off. But alot of that really had to do with picking the right woman. How you know is another story, I just got lucky....but this might sound weird but I honestly think that people WANT to think of the women doing this as bad, they dont take the time to meet some of them or get to know them. They already have their minds made up of what and who YOU are. I dont think you can judge people like that. I have been pleasantly surprised. I saw this girl that I thought was going to be such a bitch to me but turned out to be one of the sweetest people I have known and so patient with me while wrestling the "civie" mentality and not letting it ruin things between us.
I think an interesting show/documentary would be to let two or more strangers meet one another and get to know eachother and what kind of person they are, e.g. family person, student, wife/mother ect. and then after friendships, aquaintances, have been established reveal what they do. I think it would be interesting to see the results of what people thought about a person before/after revealing what they do...but people are people, so who knows...kinda funny they look down on the women here but the politicians are held on a soapbox...always seems like you have to choose between a douch bag and a turd sandwhich when voting......just sayin.
I think an interesting show/documentary would be to let two or more strangers meet one another and get to know eachother and what kind of person they are, e.g. family person, student, wife/mother ect. and then after friendships, aquaintances, have been established reveal what they do. I think it would be interesting to see the results of what people thought about a person before/after revealing what they do...but people are people, so who knows...kinda funny they look down on the women here but the politicians are held on a soapbox...always seems like you have to choose between a douch bag and a turd sandwhich when voting......just sayin.