Whats the definition....

MaxiMilyen's Avatar
This is my peeve at the moment. I am courteous and supply as much info as the gent gives me, which is usually not much. LOL. I've had ladies go beserk, not reply, and even get back with the gent to entice him her way. What can ya do? Not a thing. I simply suggest to the gents that they ask the ladies if they are ref friendly in the future, and assure them I am, along with singing the praises of those who actually do give refs, and showing my gratitude in return. It's quick and painless to provide refs and better ensures everyone's safety. We are not in competition, the gent simply wants a different experience. If you feel threatened the client wants another experience, that's silly to me, but I have been dealing with insecure women for many years. It's why I love men! LOL I got my quirks, but blocking another lady's chance to work or have fun, is not one of them. We have enough to deal with in this biz, without making it harder for one another and the clients.
KimiAmore's Avatar
My .02

Generally, it is considered impolite to repeatedly message someone with similar messages in a short amount of time. If those four PM's happened in the span of an hour then I can honestly see why she got an attitude with you AS LONG AS SHE STILL GAVE YOU A REFERENCE. If she didn't, screw her. I'd call her a hater.

Assuming a lady is reference friendly, try PM'ing her AND emailing AND texting if you really need a reference filled quickly. Each lady has a form of communication they prefer and can get to the easiest. In all the communication make sure you say that you just don't know which way she prefers to give references. In both the email and PM make sure you give your phone number so she can see that the person who just texted her is a real provider. Each form of communication should only happen ONCE per day. You can easily see if she has been active on this site and just chose to ignore you. If she has not responded in 48 hours (two rounds of inquiries) then write her off as a lady who doesn't want to be bothered. In the meantime, if evidence is pointing towards her being an discourteous cow, make sure you APOLOGIZE to your future client for the wait and don't outright tell him that his "reference" is useless because the lady doesn't care to help others. My go to phrase is "she must be very busy". Also do not text a lady you don't know well late at night. You can wait until the morning to text her if she hasn't shown recent activity on the site.

Once you are familiar with the ladies just default to the way they tell you they prefer to be contacted.

Granted, I'm the type of person that sends "Thank You" cards and was taught how to curtsy before I learned how to skip.....so I might have a different idea of how to communicate with my co-workers than the community at large. But the above works just fine for me honestly. Originally Posted by SA Angel
Pure gold indeed....thing is most providers dont state how to contact them for a reference, only that they are reference friendly, but I feel if you give me an answer back in .2 than you did not check to see if he was a client of yours...seems like a hater who thinks that her clients are suppose to see no one other than her..


SOMETIMES A MAN WANTS A DIFFERENT PATH THAN THE SAME BEAT UP ONE HE HAS BEEN WALKING.