Dear Maggie

L.A.'s Avatar
  • L.A.
  • 03-24-2015, 06:44 AM
Any kind of "stalkerish" behavior or threats done thru PMs or other communications on this site should be reported to the Mods. There's nothing they can do if you're receiving emails or texts but they will take threats through PMs as a serious board violation.

Some creepy MF'ers out there.
Tom's Avatar
  • Tom
  • 03-24-2015, 07:42 AM
Sorry to see you driven away.

For those you have already screened (me) but have not yet met with, do you have any suggestions on how to continue communication? I'm not on P411.

Thanks
Tom
  • DSK
  • 03-24-2015, 07:59 AM
Maggie,
I absolutely hate to see these guys treat you this way. You should report them to Eccie and P411. I'm really sorry it's happening to you.
Some of these fuckers sound downright dangerous or obsessive.

But I have to say my peace. I sent you a P411 request 2 years ago for an appt and after checking my P411 bio, you denied me an appt because you didn't think we'd mesh. I asked you why and you wrote that I like CIM providers and you didn't think we were compatible because you don't do CIM.

I explained that I have over 60 p411's and many recent that were FBSM only. Probably 50-60% of my appts are CIM and sometimes I want companionship, sometimes I want a massage, sometimes I want an Asian, sometimes I want a doubles PSE, sometimes I want just a HJ, sometimes I want IOP. You get the picture! Is the ideal appt for me FBSM with a PSF? Sure!!!!! But my likes and moods change with age, how my SO is treating me, how life is treating me, the time of day, adequate sleep, summer or winter, my blood pressure, how low or high my T-level is, my stress level, the tides, barometric pressure, if the stars aligned or if the Stars won... not to mention what I'm in the mood for.

Well after your response, I dropped it and said fuck it and just gave up. If you bothered checking my P411 history you'd have seen that the alot of the providers I've seen don't offer CIM or a PSF. Some do! But you never gave me a chance and I never forgot that.

My point is how many of these guys have you ignored because you make brash assumptions? I've been on these boards for 14 years with the same name. I get tested regularly and have my own group of ATF's. I rarely need p411 for screening with my history and reputation. But yet, I wasn't worth your time.

So I'm not bashing you....just want you to look at the guys that have messaged you and see if they really are stalking you or being obsessive for an appt. I gave up trying to see you a long time ago darlin' when you made a generalization about me and never gave me a chance.

For the record, I tried to schedule that initial appt based on your avatar with your huge, firm and luscious breasts since I am a breast man. I knew beforehand you were not CIM. I had NE with Russian and COB on my mind probably. Was I ok with no CIM? Yup! Were you ok seeing me? Nope.

Take care Maggie. I truly hope you stay safe, happy and healthy. Good luck to you. Originally Posted by TrailBlazer
That is a great post. There is undoubtedly a fine line between a stalker and someone who deserves an explanation in some cases. I too have been turned down in situations where I thought the lady and I could work it out pretty easily with a little communication. However, the girls have to put up with so much from so many they have to quickly screen based upon cues which may not be right in every situation, but it works in general so they have to use them. That is why a third party screener makes sense, but I think they get worn out, also, plus they always seem to slow the process down and make it more complicated. The best plan would be to eliminate the internet trolls and assorted fucktards - but that is impossible!
Chung Tran's Avatar
I don't think there's a material difference between stalker and obsessive.. the Stalker keeps dogging you for sessions, the Obsessive won't leave you alone after he's turned down.. I don't mind rejection, it helps me trim my list better than I could do myself.. and there's plenty of trim to be had..
Maggie,
I absolutely hate to see these guys treat you this way. You should report them to Eccie and P411. I'm really sorry it's happening to you.
Some of these fuckers sound downright dangerous or obsessive.

But I have to say my peace. I sent you a P411 request 2 years ago for an appt and after checking my P411 bio, you denied me an appt because you didn't think we'd mesh. I asked you why and you wrote that I like CIM providers and you didn't think we were compatible because you don't do CIM.

I explained that I have over 60 p411's and many recent that were FBSM only. Probably 50-60% of my appts are CIM and sometimes I want companionship, sometimes I want a massage, sometimes I want an Asian, sometimes I want a doubles PSE, sometimes I want just a HJ, sometimes I want IOP. You get the picture! Is the ideal appt for me FBSM with a PSF? Sure!!!!! But my likes and moods change with age, how my SO is treating me, how life is treating me, the time of day, adequate sleep, summer or winter, my blood pressure, how low or high my T-level is, my stress level, the tides, barometric pressure, if the stars aligned or if the Stars won... not to mention what I'm in the mood for.

Well after your response, I dropped it and said fuck it and just gave up. If you bothered checking my P411 history you'd have seen that the alot of the providers I've seen don't offer CIM or a PSF. Some do! But you never gave me a chance and I never forgot that.

My point is how many of these guys have you ignored because you make brash assumptions? I've been on these boards for 14 years with the same name. I get tested regularly and have my own group of ATF's. I rarely need p411 for screening with my history and reputation. But yet, I wasn't worth your time.

So I'm not bashing you....just want you to look at the guys that have messaged you and see if they really are stalking you or being obsessive for an appt. I gave up trying to see you a long time ago darlin' when you made a generalization about me and never gave me a chance.

For the record, I tried to schedule that initial appt based on your avatar with your huge, firm and luscious breasts since I am a breast man. I knew beforehand you were not CIM. I had NE with Russian and COB on my mind probably. Was I ok with no CIM? Yup! Were you ok seeing me? Nope.

Take care Maggie. I truly hope you stay safe, happy and healthy. Good luck to you. Originally Posted by TrailBlazer
I will never see anyone who mentions a specific service. That is written in every ad I've ever written. If you mentioned CIM, I can tell you right now I would have turned you down. I do not see people who mention a menu. I don't care how many ok's you have. You keep asking random ladies for CIM and I'll keep not seeing people who ask for specific services in exchange for money and we'll see who ends up with a criminal record. Because it's not going to be me. I want to go on and have a family and a career, I imagine being arrested for hooking might put a bit of a damper on things! So you can keep your $250. It's not worth ruining my entire life for.
But beyond that, I don't have to provide any explanation at all. If I don't want to see you because your hair is brown, that's my prerogative. I truly believe that's where the stalking comes in. It's born out of a sense of entitlement. Most of the people doing it are well known board members with a ton of ok's.
Like you, they feel like they "deserve" to be seen, and become angry that I don't feel that way. What can I say? I'm a human being with likes and dislikes. Human beings are funny that way. Call me a monster but I don't want to spend time with people I don't like. If I already don't like someone in email or by reading their posts, I'm not going to like them in person.
From your post it seems like you are saying that you didn't care if the experience was different than what you usually look for (PSE) because I have big firm breasts. But as an ethical provider, it's my job to provide a great experience. If I know I'm not a PSE provider, that should be mentioned. I want to have a good time too and I want to choose people that are ok with my services.
Also, to answer your question.. I define stalking as someone who has been told no but they continue to email anyway.

EDITED:
I just went back and reviewed all of our PM's. I didn't deny you. I simply warned you that I was a GFE provider and not PSE. I was still open to seeing you. You declined the appointment. I still have the PM's exchanges if there is any doubt. Please be honest when discussing me. I will however leave the above response because it does apply to many people that I haven't been able to see because they mentioned services.
These ladies are not required to give anyone an explanation for why they say no. It would be nice to know but that is their call. And yes, sometimes they get it wrong. But they get lots of these situations. It has to be unnerving and make them gun shy.

Keep in mind the vast majority of guys doing this are broken in some way. They have issues. Some small, some large. Otherwise they would not be here. Most respect the boundaries but a few don't. Eccie is a breeding ground for these kind of guys. It has gotten very large and popular. It makes it very easy for these kinds of guys to find women to obsess over.

Keep all communications through the site. Have a hobby phone and only give the number to established clients. Anonymous email accounts. Never do sessions in your residence. Move your incall when the lease expires. Don't go by post counts and # of reviews alone. Ask for references and check them. Post stalker names in infoshare. Post them in coed so guys know who to not give info to.

Those are a few things I can think of from my side. I am sure the experienced ladies can come up with more. If there is not a sticky in the women's forum on safety, maybe there should be one.

And Maggie, those are not specifically aimed at you. Just general thoughts

Please don't leave Eccie. Just revise your communications. I am sure there are many guys here who have or will enjoy your company and still respect the boundaries.
The ladies who provide the services we like do so at their own risk and their own discretion. They don't really owe anyone an explanation if they for whatever reason are not feeling it with me or you.

It is probably better that way, because as we all know, YMMV and who wants to be on an appointment with a lady you talked into seeing you and is thinking whether she should have gone through with the meet or not. Much better to find someone who is at least feigning enthusiasm at seeing you.

Live and let live. Just because they hang out their shingle doesn't mean they have to accept every swinging dick with P411 Oks or eccie reviews and references.
Grace Preston's Avatar
I have never understood the type of gent who continually tries to schedule with someone who has said no. Why would you want a session with someone who clearly doesn't wish to see you?

I get it... nobody likes rejection-- and that has to be doubly true when you can't even buy what you want. But when you behave in the manner displayed above, all you do is confirm our first notion to decline. I have had a couple of gents who I have declined, who months later sent me a "I know we got off on the wrong foot, but I'd like another opportunity" message. Those gents I generally end up seeing. But trying to sneak in on the sly, making threats, or just being insulting aren't going to get you what you want.

This is one of the drawbacks of hobby boards in general. You get to "know" people on a deeper level sometimes, which makes it even harder to accept when told "I don't think we're a good fit". I've never had these issues with gents who are either P411 or find me via means other than hobby boards. Every issue I've had of this nature has been from a true "Hobbyist".
TrailBlazer's Avatar
I will never see anyone who mentions a specific service. That is written in every ad I've ever written. If you mentioned CIM, I can tell you right now I would have turned you down. I do not see people who mention a menu. I don't care how many ok's you have. You keep asking random ladies for CIM and I'll keep not seeing people who ask for specific services in exchange for money and we'll see who ends up with a criminal record. Because it's not going to be me. I want to go on and have a family and a career, I imagine being arrested for hooking might put a bit of a damper on things! So you can keep your $250. It's not worth ruining my entire life for.
But beyond that, I don't have to provide any explanation at all. If I don't want to see you because your hair is brown, that's my prerogative. I truly believe that's where the stalking comes in. It's born out of a sense of entitlement. Most of the people doing it are well known board members with a ton of ok's.
Like you, they feel like they "deserve" to be seen, and become angry that I don't feel that way. What can I say? I'm a human being with likes and dislikes. Human beings are funny that way. Call me a monster but I don't want to spend time with people I don't like. If I already don't like someone in email or by reading their posts, I'm not going to like them in person.
From your post it seems like you are saying that you didn't care if the experience was different than what you usually look for (PSE) because I have big firm breasts. But as an ethical provider, it's my job to provide a great experience. If I know I'm not a PSE provider, that should be mentioned. I want to have a good time too and I want to chose people that are ok with my services.
Also, to answer your question.. I define stalking as someone who has been told no but they continue to email anyway.

EDITED:
I just went back and reviewed all of our PM's. I didn't deny you. I simply warned you that I was a GFE provider and not PSE. I was still open to seeing you. You declined the appointment. I still have the PM's exchanges if there is any doubt. Please be honest when discussing me. I will however leave the above response because it does apply to many people that I haven't been able to see because they mentioned services. Originally Posted by Maggie_May
Ok Maggs.....I owe you a HUGE apology. At my old age of mid 40's my memory is slipping. I reviewed the P411 PM from May 2014 and you are correct. I must have been thinking of someone else. So....my sincerest apologies. Now I have to research and see who that was.
But I didn't ask for a specific service. Just an appt.....for the record.
Again.....apologies. Those tits are still spectacular (and your personality is ok too....I guess. ; )))). LoL
I owe you lunch or a coffee at a place of your choice. I'd like to make it up to you.
I have never understood the type of gent who continually tries to schedule with someone who has said no. Why would you want a session with someone who clearly doesn't wish to see you?

I get it... nobody likes rejection-- and that has to be doubly true when you can't even buy what you want. But when you behave in the manner displayed above, all you do is confirm our first notion to decline. I have had a couple of gents who I have declined, who months later sent me a "I know we got off on the wrong foot, but I'd like another opportunity" message. Those gents I generally end up seeing. But trying to sneak in on the sly, making threats, or just being insulting aren't going to get you what you want.

This is one of the drawbacks of hobby boards in general. You get to "know" people on a deeper level sometimes, which makes it even harder to accept when told "I don't think we're a good fit". I've never had these issues with gents who are either P411 or find me via means other than hobby boards. Every issue I've had of this nature has been from a true "Hobbyist". Originally Posted by GracePreston
Exactly! Plus, why would I let someone know my incall address that clearly can't take no for an answer? So that they can start driving by, maybe knocking on the door when I won't answer an email? And I do NOT want to be in a dark locked room with someone who is clearly obsessed with me. Making fake handles, trashing me behind my back, calling me names, trying to manipulate me or guilt me... Is not going to work.
If you've been told no.. And you take that no gracefully. That goes a long long way.. 6 months later if you send a follow up mail.. I will absolutely take that into consideration.
Ok Maggs.....I owe you a HUGE apology. At my old age of mid 40's my memory is slipping. I reviewed the P411 PM from May 2014 and you are correct. I must have been thinking of someone else. So....my sincerest apologies. Now I have to research and see who that was. I owe you lunch or a coffee or something.
But I didn't ask for a specific service. Just an appt.....for the record.
Again.....apologies. Those tits are still spectacular (and your personality is ok too....I guess. ; )))) Originally Posted by TrailBlazer
No worries! I thought you might be confused, I wasn't even on p411 two years ago! Be well
Clit Lover's Avatar
Maggie you said that you would deny anyone that mentions a specific service in a PM? I always tell a provider in my initial PM the services I enjoy in a typical session. I feel that it will help her decide if she would be interested in seeing me. I also provide references and some basic information about me. I have never been declined due to mentioning the services I enjoy. Are you saying that mentioning specific services in a PM is inappropriate? So I would automatically declined by you?
Maggie you said that you would deny anyone that mentions a specific service in a PM? I always tell a provider in my initial PM the services I enjoy in a typical session. I feel that it will help her decide if she would be interested in seeing me. I also provide references and some basic information about me. I have never been declined due to mentioning the services I enjoy. Are you saying that mentioning specific services in a PM is inappropriate? So I would automatically declined by you? Originally Posted by gardo
Correct.

And if you are seeing girls that routinely discuss services in email or on the phone, know that more likely than not, she will eventually be arrested and lets hope that she's erased your number, texts and emails before the police confiscate her phone/computer and go through those items to build a case. Otherwise, know that you will more likely than not be contacted by the police in order to build a case against her. And let's hope they only try to call you and not come to your job, which is what happened to a hobbyist friend of mine.
I am very very discrete, low volume and safe and I make no apologies for that.
And I only want to spend time with people who also value discretion and make our safety a priority.
pyramider's Avatar
Its no wonder Maggie is pissed by the idiot fucktards. All that love, attention, stalker behavior and not one taint reference. She should be pissed.
Thank you everyone that commented in support! I really appreciate the advice. I would also like to apologize for the stern tone Ive taken in this thread. I'm very sweet and nice and always take care to be very positive in my postings and also privately but I can see now that some certain people are reading that as a weakness. I seem to have so many people harassing me, far far more than the other girls, so I felt it was important to let everyone know that while I am very nice, I am also not afraid to call someone out. I shouldn't have to wake up each day and feel harassed and stressed and it's getting old. And so that is why I may seem very stern in my comments. Thank you for the support!