Provider References

Would it be quicker and easier if the guys wrote the lady that he needs a reference on saying that he is going to need her verification to see another? I think it would eliminate the issue or do you think guys would be turned off by that?

"Gros bisous"

Sophi St Rhee

Thanks for your repy. The reason I,m asking is because the last two providers I've seen never looked at my profile. They turn out to be great but did they screen me? I guess I'm understanding your response. Originally Posted by thecooldude

Did you supply them with any other information? I always read the guys information provided on p411.

Screen me baby! Screen me!

I agree, If a provider does NOT screen at all then to me she dosent care about her own safety so why would she care about yours. Screening protects us all, and sets us apart as professionals whom take the extra time to make sure we are all safe. Im using verification site now along with provider okay, and or work info. No amount of money is worth your safety or freedom.

I don't always remember everything about a client in the past but I would ALWAYS remember the ones who were rude and take note of that. And on P411, of course, I have my own little personal notes about the guy so I can remember about him. Keeping in mind too that just because someone has OKAYS does not necessarily mean they're 'okay' for another lady which is why I always try to contact one or two ladies that a gent has seen from P411 who has given them an okay so I know what to expect. One guy had 12 okays and he was such an asshole to me that I gave him a NOT OKAY.

I want a provider to screen me and worried when they don't. I'm as nervous as the provider when meeting for the first time. I'm thinking, if she doesn't screen me then she's careless or the LE.Question, p411 use to email me when a provider was looking at my profile. Does this mean she's looking at my okays or can she see my okays without seeing my profile? Originally Posted by thecooldude

You have to look at your profile in order to see your okays alot of times I look at some clients p411 because I have forgotten who they were and or I have a message from them or something.. Its not always a bad thing if you know you have contacted a lady about an appt and you have never seen them

I don't always remember everything about a client in the past but I would ALWAYS remember the ones who were rude and take note of that. And on P411, of course, I have my own little personal notes about the guy so I can remember about him. Keeping in mind too that just because someone has OKAYS does not necessarily mean they're 'okay' for another lady which is why I always try to contact one or two ladies that a gent has seen from P411 who has given them an okay so I know what to expect. One guy had 12 okays and he was such an asshole to me that I gave him a NOT OKAY. Originally Posted by alluringava

I have also had situations where all 3 providers had different inputs on a client all varying from total ass to nice and that when I get confused.. I start thinking if I should take him or not because there are so many different experiences and usually I dont and then they get mad... But alot of men think of us as we have nothing to lose and they are the ones who will be affected the most... Those men really piss me off because we to have a life and alot of us ladies are intelligent and have things going for ourselves just as much as some of these men... Or the men lately that have told me I have no references but just take one chance. Ya ok let me take the chance to ruin my whole life over an experience I can share with a client who actually has my required information... Ladys just becareful and I am always willing to give you a reference... The ladys who dont screen or dont give out references shouldnt be able to view some parts of the board because of there lack of willingness to help one another..

I have allowed a reference request fall through the cracks before and did not get back to it when I should have (sorry Sami!) And it was my fault, and very unprofessional. I will be apologizing for it until the end of time, but it happend, and if it happend with me, I am sure it has happend with other ladies with the best of intentions.

However, if the same lady 'forgets' to get back with you more then once, then there certainly is an issue indeed!

Many gentlemen enjoy tasting a variety of ladies. Of course they do! This is a candy shop! I have many regulars that still runs around sampling the wares, but because there is just something about me that they really enjoy, they come back.

Now, there are many others that will come and see me once, and that's it....months go by and I am handing out references for him hand over fist. I don't mind, I consider as my job to do so for one, a big favor to the ladies that I hope they return for two, and finally, the gentleman was nice to me when he saw me, why wouldn't I be nice to him now??

Ladies who refuse to give references are selfish, and they are putting us all at risk. The good news is that they are usually recognized for this. I for one will inform the gentlemen of who did and who didn't send me a reference.

When it comes to keeping us all safe, all personal issues and feelings should be put off to the side. There are things that are much larger then just your feelings. I give references to the same ladies who have ignored my emails to them for months...and the same ladies that have talked smack about me. It is not the gentlemans fault there's an issue between two ladies, and it's not YOUR fault, or Sally's fault, or Tom's fault...why punish the masses and put them at risk?

Here is an icon that I keep on my site, it helps to ensure both the men and ladis that you are a lady who loves and respects others, and your top goal is to keep everyone safe! Feel free to use this!

I have also had situations where all 3 providers had different inputs on a client all varying from total ass to nice and that when I get confused.. I start thinking if I should take him or not because there are so many different experiences and usually I dont and then they get mad... But alot of men think of us as we have nothing to lose and they are the ones who will be affected the most... Those men really piss me off because we to have a life and alot of us ladies are intelligent and have things going for ourselves just as much as some of these men... Or the men lately that have told me I have no references but just take one chance. Ya ok let me take the chance to ruin my whole life over an experience I can share with a client who actually has my required information... Ladys just becareful and I am always willing to give you a reference... The ladys who dont screen or dont give out references shouldnt be able to view some parts of the board because of there lack of willingness to help one another.. Originally Posted by oLiViA88

I never understood providers who were not reference-friendly. It's like, my God, we're all in this business together and even if we don't always get along or there's cattiness and backstabbing ( which there is), AT LEAST be polite enough to be concerned for our safety.

And also, what is OKAY or 'acceptable' to one lady may not be to another. I don't understand the provider, for example, when I asked for a reference, who did not tell me that her client had bumps on his penis and that he had horrible, horrible BO and refused to take a shower. If he did that with me, he does that to other girls, you can be sure of that for the most part. So when he left, I e mailed her and asked her if when he saw HER, did he have those bumps and was he smelly? She said " Yeah but I didn't think that I should mention that at least he was nice." THANKS A LOT!

Which is why as I said, even on P411, I contact some ladies who have given OKAYS to tell me what to expect. And I'm glad I do this because one lady told me that the guy was okay 'but he kept trying to convince her to take the condom off". Well why would you give an OKAY to someone who kept trying to get BBFS? Maybe she didn't think that was a big deal. You don't have to be some Jack the Ripper psychopath to NOT be okay. Some ladies have higher tolerance levels than others.


In my hometown, some of the girls are downright RUDE when you ask for a reference, too.

Omg....See him! Total sweetheart and good looking...make ya wanna give it up free! Well not really but close! He's skinny dark hair and is handsome!


Not dangerous and def not any kind of LE


See him I promise you won't regret it
Originally Posted by oLiViA88

Ok that was a reference you got back on me right? I mean it totally describes me except for the good looking, skinny, dark hair, handsome part...but I am a total sweetheart.

Ok that was a reference you got back on me right? I mean it totally describes me except for the good looking, skinny, dark hair, handsome part...but I am a total sweetheart. Originally Posted by boardman

I'd prefer it if you looked like a cat, the one in your avatar! OMG so hot

I'd prefer it if you looked like a cat, the one in your avatar! OMG so hot Originally Posted by alluringava

There's definitive proof that WALDT...

Any provider at anytime has my permission to pm me and get a reference check. We all should do it!

I'm a long time hobbiest from Mississippi who travels to Houston a couple times a year. I like to play when in town. I expect to be screened, even aggressively, and would be worried about a provider who did not ask for references and who did not check them out. That's for both her safety and mine.

But I understand the issue. Some providers just will not give references. Maybe they do not keep info very long (not so bad from the hobbiest perspective, but a problem come screening time).

I try to contact the other providers ahead of time and get their specific permission to give their name and contact to the the lady I am seeking to see. Sometimes I can't contact them. Web site may be down, email addy changed, retired, etc. Other times providers may just be busy with both the hobby, day job and their "real" life, so delays happen.

Lately, I've tried to post enough reviews that, hopefully, even if the provider does not get back to the lady screening me, then maybe recent reviews, ECCIE posts, regular board presence, long time board membership here and other boards and constant long time use of username and hobby email addy might provide some level of comfort to the lady doing the screening. The providers I have reviewed are typically ones who also have been good about offering references when asked.

Sometimes reference to the review jogs the memory of the reviewed provider about the guy.

But, please, ladies, as others have said, if you expect to be able to get the references you need to be safe yourself, then please reciprocate so we guys can get to see the lady screening us. That way we can all be safe and have fun.

Just a thought . . .

BTW: Cecilia/Olivia88 - you are hot!

I agree, If a provider does NOT screen at all then to me she dosent care about her own safety so why would she care about yours. Screening protects us all, and sets us apart as professionals whom take the extra time to make sure we are all safe. Im using verification site now along with provider okay, and or work info. No amount of money is worth your safety or freedom. Originally Posted by Ms. Athena

And yet sadly I know a good friend of mine who does no screening at all, and she HAS put herself at risk. Her rationale is that "Well I've seen a thousand guys and only a few have done this or that..." it included rape and robbery. And many times, because she works 24/7, after certain hours she gets a lot of no-shows and time-wasters or really fucked up guys on drugs. I try to tell her about references but she never listens. And my fear is that the next time 'one of the few' does something, it may cost her her life.