What's your favorite little Johnny jokes?

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Brittneyy's Avatar


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Little Mike, Johnny's Cousin

Little Mike, Jonny's cousin is worse than Jonny ever could be.

One day before Christmas little Mike was talking to his father. "You be good this year and not cuss so much, and maybe santa will bring you something really nice!" Little Mike's dad said with a smile. "If not you won't get anything nice"

"I already know what I want for Christmas dad! When I wake up on Christmas morning I want to wake up and see a new fucking BB gun at the foot of my fucking bed!" little Mike said.

Little Mike's dad rolls his eyes.

"Then I want to go down stairs and see a fucking toy train going around the fucking Christmas tree!"

"Oh yeah?" His dad says.

"Yeah then I'll go out side and I want a fucking new bike leaning up against the fucking garage!"

"I wouldn't count on it young man, not after how you just talked."

When Christmas morning comes Mike wakes up. Laying at the foot of his bed is a steaming pile of dog shit! So he goes down stairs. Around the Christmas tree is a neatly arranged ring of dog shit. Then he goes outside and there by the garage is, you guessed it another pile of Dog Shit!

"DAMN!" Little Mike says, starting to cry.

"Well son did you learn a lesson?" Mikes dad asks.

"I don't know dad, I think I got a new puppy but I can't fucking find it!"
imajustme's Avatar
Little Johnny's perfect penis.

Little Johnny got caught playin with himself in class. Teacher said ok, and asked him what he was playing with.
Little Johnny didn't know how to answer and went home. That night he saw his dad naked in the bathroom, looked down at dad's pecker and asked: Dad, what's that?
Dad promptly replied: This son is a penis...and might I add, it's a perfect penis.

The next day in class Little Johnny made it a point to get caught playin with himself in front of teacher.
Teacher said: Little Johnny do you have an answer about what you're playin with?

Little Johnny: Yes teacher, this is a penis....and might I add, if it were 2 inches shorter it would be a perfect penis!
Little Johnnie's teacher was teaching the class about the idea of consent. "Johnnie, suppose you knock on the door of your friend Susie's house and Susie opens the door in her nightgown. How would you find out what she will consent to do with you?" Johnnie answered, "That depends where in her nightgown the door is!"
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