What if your SO hobbied?

Not true for all of us. I would not have a problem with this. Actually, let me phrase that correctly, I don't have a problem with her extracurricular activity, as she doesn't with mine. Originally Posted by 69er

Fortunately there are open minded and forgiving people in this world like you and your wife, i bet you are very happy you found such a match.

When I am in a relationship it has to be monogamous, for both of us. If she will not do for me in the bedroom what it is I need and desire, I talk with her and come to a conclusion. I then have to make the choice of whether or not giving that activity up say for example, CIM, is worth the relationship, if so I fantasize about it, if not I move on. In my experiences though the SO has always been willing to do what I ask at first and as time drags on she is less and less apt to do some things.

Point is I do not need other women to fulfill my need for sexual fun, if I am in love with her, just me. If shee needs something sexaully, I ask her and talk openly what she likes and does not, because I love her I want to please her. Dilemma here is the double standard, because I adore sex so much, I am always willing to spend 45 minutes on oral with her when that is what she likes. I make her feel special all day long on a continuing basis and end up in passion in the evening. None of my So's ever complained about that with me. Just seems the ladies have not been willing to do BBBJCIM after I am with her for a few months. It seems I am to contiune to cater to her needs while mine ar not met - double standard and time to go, before the infidelity starts.

I had an SO ealy in 2011 and I started to become interested in another lady because are relationship was as I described falling apart. I told her the truth, I was interested ni another woman, she did what she knew I liked for a few days and stopped again. She figured I was not worth CIM to her, lol. I never saw the other lady until we agreed our relationship was over. I do not hobby while in a committed relationship, just me.

For me personally IF I was to be a committed relationship I personally would think I was doing something wrong unless he was a part of it somehow...but I don't foresee any changes in my recent futre so it's all good I have my BFE's and I am loving that...

Well whats good for the goose is good for the gander...swinging doors dont swing just one way...so it has to be okay for your SO if your doing it you cant get too mad if they start doing it; but that being said those ground rules would be better worked out before rather than later.
All i ask is do it with respect and be careful not to bring something home either of you dont want.

Laugh. And then tell him I've been doing the same thing.

As long as she wasn't doing things that she has taken off the menu for me, I'm cool with it.

Well, if you're talking about women significant others, they don't hobby. They fuck around. That's because women don't have to pay for sex.

I actually know a hobbyist...who has an SO that signed up as a female hobbyist. After I was told of that situation...I decided not to see him bcd. All I could see was trouble down the road. I think he was a little offended, but I was just being honest.

So, I guess there are some people who don't have issues with an *open* relationship.

I hope I'd be able to take the high road, and say, at least she's getting some.

That would make me a pimp and I would have to take shit from the guys here. On the other hand...

I would like to know if anyone has had this concern. I had a fiance who I saw for 9 years and it ended with her cheating. Then I had a wife who I saw for 14 years. 10 years married and it ended with her cheating. I never knew that this world existed until November of last year. Now I know. I have never cheated and believe I never would but now that I know about this and have an ATF I am questioning myself. I hope I would never cheat. I know how hurtful it is but now it is one text away from happening. During my marriage 1 of my ex's friend tried to initiate a sexual relationship and I turned her down because I loved my ex but now I think my world has opened up so much. So easy to just send that text. Anybody else had this happen? Any providers had a client ask that they not respond just in case the client has a moment of weakness?

Call up the ex's friend