Discretion on the board

Cpalmson's Avatar
I think you have to play some thing as described here on a case by case basis. I don't think you can have a standard rule. I think it boils down to communication between client and provider on what is acceptable especially if you see each other on a regular basis. For example, I see one girl often and at times she wants to be UTR and at times she wants the reviews or word of mouth. Everyone just needs to talk about it in advance.

Also, for the life of me, how can a provider "claim" exclusivity" over a client? That is kinda counter intuitive of the hobby. Providers see dozens of men if not more in their career. As a client, I like seeing a variety of women. Now, I do rotate around seeing a core group of ladies, but they all know that I play the field and may go a couple of months before seeing them again. I get that some girls see a client as a cash machine and "count" on him to see them in order to pay the bills. If a girl finds herself in this situation, she needs to stop providing and find a sugar daddy.

About the other topic you threw in. I knew right away who you were talking about. Good thing neither one of them uses ECCIE. Trust his judgement about not writing you a review. Having a secret lover is fun and exciting anyway. I see it now. Stolen glances. Heart quickening when you are introduced like you have never met before. Oh wait, I will see it. See you at the M&G. Originally Posted by HeatherDAngelo
Now Heather that isn't fair. Of course you recognize the client, you have insider information. I don't think outsiders would know. And that's all I'm going to say about that.
That's true. I know the players so I have an unfair advantage. No one else would be able to figure it out.
I let the gent make the first move on mentioning our meeting. If he doesn't say anything, then I don't either. I don't get upset if someone I'm seeing or have seen sees someone that charges more than me. I figure they saw me because there was something about me that appealed to them, and I'm assuming that's why they went and saw the higher priced lady too.

As far as being in fear of a certain provider finding out he's seeing others.....I just don't understand them condoning that behavior. Does she do that with all her clients, so are all her clients in fear of her finding out they see others? Stop going to see them...hopefully the lack of business will make them change that attitude.
It comes down to three basic points.

The two people need to communicate.

Then they need to communicate.

After that, they should communicate.

That kind of discretion is very personal. I wouldn't do it with a provider I have seen unless I was sure it was OK. I understood her situation and she understood mine. The exception being if I have reviewed her then why would I not acknowledge I know her?

Saying "I saw you yesterday" is more questionable. Both people in the same town? Does it give away that she or he was somewhere different "yesterday"? Will it expose something it shouldn't?

If a provider in DC says she saw me I have no issue since everyone knows I am in DC. If she said she saw me on the street, or in an unnamed restaurant I would have no issue. If she named the restaurant I would count that as indiscreet.

If I was in some small town and a local provider there said the same thing I would view it with more concern.

If she is supposedly in Dallas posted "Hi Sweety! Thanks for the dinner last night" while the reality is we had dinner three nights before in Chicago, then I'd just smile at the people on here who take themselves too seriously and are far too gullible and I'd move on.
RedLeg505's Avatar
if a previous provider will not see me because I have met with a certain lady or paid more $ for another lady than her rate.....Oh well. Originally Posted by SNL9933
I see a number of Providers. I have no problem reading reviews that other hobbyists write about Providers I've seen and enjoyed. If a Provider ever has a problem with me seeing/reviewing another provider, I'll tell her I'm sorry she feels that way and move on to others. The whole POINT of this is to NOT have "relationship" problems with jealousy or whatever.
JohnnyYanks's Avatar
This sounds exciting I want to go to this M&G. Originally Posted by rockerrick
Me too. I'm in. You can square up on the scotch you owe. I wonder, will CD be there?
JohnnyYanks's Avatar
That's true. I know the players so I have an unfair advantage. No one else would be able to figure it out. Originally Posted by HeatherDAngelo
I know a sleuth I could bring. But he's presently banned from this site. That needn't be a problem, eh? I wonder, is CD going?
Err on the side of discretion; at all times.
Solitaire's Avatar
To even discuss a session, period, is indiscreet in my opinion... Originally Posted by Camille Fox
Agreed !!
joesmo888's Avatar
this thread could be the next lifetime movie plot

I've experienced this sort of attachment by providers and its almost as if I have a relationship within a relationship. and its like if I see another provider then I'm cheating on her. yet its okay for her to screw other guys that week for money. its pretty funny. humans are weird creatures...
WTF's Avatar
  • WTF
  • 02-01-2015, 10:51 AM
To even discuss a session, period, is indiscreet in my opinion... Originally Posted by Camille Fox
True....or any other contact you have not run by your client.
Guest042416's Avatar
fuck and leave don't get connected keep it simple boys and girls
thecooldude's Avatar
this thread could be the next lifetime movie plot

I've experienced this sort of attachment by providers and its almost as if I have a relationship within a relationship. and its like if I see another provider then I'm cheating on her. yet its okay for her to screw other guys that week for money. its pretty funny. humans are weird creatures... Originally Posted by joesmo888
Dude, it's about the money, especially if she's your ATF and local. She's laying claim on your donation. Money will always be the determining factor.
awl4knot's Avatar
This has nothing to do with the topic at hand, but I want to thank Heather and Jessica for raising the level of discourse in this forum. I go weeks without seeing anything of interest, but these ladies have points of view and insights which hold my attention. You can now resume the debate.