I started counseling at her insistence earlier this summer. It has helped, but we have t really made any big breakthroughs yet. Just basically the ant I essentially abdicated my authority in the relationship to meet her needs for the past 26 years and now we are just sort of roommates. I earn 3 times her salary and make most of the money to support us and she spends it. Originally Posted by BasicGuyA buddy of mine recently went through a divorce, split up his retirement account, she took the house and the kids, split the cash etc etc. He was secretly tracking their marital relations over the last 5 years and found that each time they had sex, it cost him $50k.
Through a series of bad choices and unchecked credit spending, we would have to sell the house to pay off things. Money is so tight in this economy already, and while we combined make great money, our spending habits and her tastes stretch every penny. I do t have enough free cash to get a place for a separation so we are stuck trying to work it out under the same roof. Thankfully the kids are essentially grown and the youngest will be in college next year.It ain’t going to get better, dude. It’s better to get your ducks in a row and prepare for the collision then live the slow death you are describing.
I came home today to her telling me she just felt blah all day and didn’t want to do anything tonight. I asked what was wrong and she just glared at me and looked back at her phone.
I figure I have 30 or so years left on this planet and I am not certain if I want to spend them walking on egg shells and worrying that any decision I make will be wrong or will trigger some type of drama. We live in a small town, so a divorce would be very public and I just don’t need that drama either.
Funny that I am getting some better feedback here than from my therapist! Originally Posted by BasicGuy
Through a series of bad choices and unchecked credit spending, we would have to sell the house to pay off things. Money is so tight in this economy already, and while we combined make great money, our spending habits and her tastes stretch every penny. I do t have enough free cash to get a place for a separation so we are stuck trying to work it out under the same roof. Thankfully the kids are essentially grown and the youngest will be in college next year.
I came home today to her telling me she just felt blah all day and didn’t want to do anything tonight. I asked what was wrong and she just glared at me and looked back at her phone.
I figure I have 30 or so years left on this planet and I am not certain if I want to spend them walking on egg shells and worrying that any decision I make will be wrong or will trigger some type of drama. We live in a small town, so a divorce would be very public and I just don’t need that drama either.
Funny that I am getting some better feedback here than from my therapist! Originally Posted by BasicGuy
I started counseling at her insistence earlier this summer. It has helped, but we have t really made any big breakthroughs yet. Just basically the ant I essentially abdicated my authority in the relationship to meet her needs for the past 26 years and now we are just sort of roommates. I earn 3 times her salary and make most of the money to support us and she spends it. Originally Posted by BasicGuyWhen I was married to my first wife I was always trying to do everything to make her happy. I worked 2 jobs to her part time job. We had sex maybe once or twice evy 1 to 2 weeks. I have always been one that always wanted everyone to be happy to the point I was miserable. The straw that eneded it was on my 27th birthday when I came home and she wasn't there. When she finally showed up she didn't even wish me a happy birthday. It was at that point that I guess it finally clicked in my head and told her we either work as a husband and wife or we needed to end it. As the saying goes, it lifted a weight off of me. Listen at the end of the day you will have to make your own decisions on what to do but, when you make it you will find out you are in a lot better place. Good Luck