Why do some guys feel like it’s okay to negotiate donations? If you can’t afford the 300 for my hour then maybe you should find someone else. I have it stated clearly in my ad that any attempt to negotiate my rates will end all communication and put on a DNS list. I just don’t understand why. Any insight?
Originally Posted by Tiffany Ryder
Tiffany, I'm thinking that your hagglers fall into four general groups. The first three have something important in common. The fourth is, well, different.
First group: those who can't manage to pay your rates. "Maybe you should find someone else," you say, and that's what they'll do, or not find anyone at all. Their thinking would be that they have nothing to lose by haggling with you; the worst you can do is not reply to them, and put them on your DNS list, which just means they won't be seeing you, which they already won't be doing unless they can haggle down your rates. It isn't very good thinking, but it's their thinking.
Second group: those who can't bear the thought that they might pay $300 for an hour of your time, when they might have paid less by haggling. I think that with some men, and some women as well, the fear of a missed bargain is a real fear. Why that is, I can't say.
Third group: those who simply enjoy bargaining for its own sake. To them, it's a game, which they win if they "sell" a lower rate to you.
What these groups have in common is a failure to grasp the difference between purchasing time with you and purchasing an object, like the car that inevitably comes up in these threads. The purchase of an object is, usually, something that can be bargained over, and properly so. What these guys don't see is that when they pay a woman to spend time being intimate with them, in acts of simulated love, what they're buying is an experience, and it's a fragile one. What they're paying for is damaged or ruined by the bargaining process itself. Suppose they do catch you in financial distress, and talk you into taking $200 for your $300 hour. Do they expect to, after conducting a tough haggling session and thoroughly pissing you off, then say, "Okay, that's done, now let's have some sweet, passionate lovemaking." Gee, what could
possibly go wrong?
The fourth group is the different -- and ugly -- one. You have some low-grade specimens who are deeply unhappy, have feelings of inferiority (which are probably pretty accurate), and want to compensate by mistreating someone else. They want to "punch down," because that's safer. And of course we all know that society assigns a very low status to sex workers, so you all make an attractive target for Group Four. These are the guys who love to use ugly terms like "whore" -- a few of them like to troll this board -- and who, if they succeed in getting an appointment, are apt to bully you, try to see a little fear in your eyes, and so on. For these guys, haggling is the equivalent of foreplay in the abuse process. And, while I hope they are rare, a firmly enforced I-won't-talk-to-a-haggler policy will probably filter them out pretty well.