I think I've outlived my dick.

My issue is not ED but RE. I can maintain erections for considerable lengths of time while getting "close" repeatedly. I'm working on it with help from SO (who hobbies with me) as well as with medical professionals. Interestingly, the professionals almost universally commend me for trying to get assistance and report ED and RE are far more common than reported for the over 45s but many men are reluctant to report due to believing the current male sexual stereotypes.

I'm not going to get into causes or treatments but will rather urge men who even "think" they are experiencing ED or RE to seek professional advice. It is stoopit to endure that which need not be endured.

OBTW, sex still feels WONDERFUL!, which is why I keep at it.

OG, it happens, and diabetic neuropathy is a tough one. I think your approach is correct. Keep talking to you docs. You might get a second opinion from another urologist or even ask for a neuro consult. I don't think you current team would get their nose out of joint if you asked for that given that the next step is an implant. That's a big step.

But like Tin Man, I've found my libido on a significant downhill slide. And it doesn't really bother me. In fact, given the choice between getting my libidos back, and my hair, I think I'd pick my hair. Life is a lot more simple now!

Well told, Tin Man, well told.

The issue is getting your core dick-centric man psychology to allow you to let go and realize there are other ways to occupy yourself. All the time spent trying to get your youthful erection to rise from the ashes like the mythical dick phoenix can be spent doing other productive and enjoyable things. Plus, the less you think about whether your dick will work, the more likely it is to tell you when it IS ready. In youth the small head thinks for itself. As we age we tend to try to help it with the big head, and that is the biggest mistake of all. Thinking about a hard on will pretty much kill it, it's not a cerebral process after all.

If you get your T checked don't let them tell you "for a man of your age" because when they do that, it's low but average "for a man of your age" and they don't want to do anything about it. You want them to kick it back up over 500 at least because that's where research says it starts to kick you in the, well, you know.

[QUOTE=OldGrump;1054112271]Not to minimize the pleasure of a good DATY session followed by cuddling and caressing, but at some point, cost becomes an issue. I know provider's time is what we are paying for, but let's be honest, if the big explosion doesn't happen, we question our personal value of the time spent.

There are other older guys here with the same problems - and even a few younger ones experience it on occasion./QUOTE]

I am in my 50's but the problem has been going on about 10 years now.

We need to pass on the secret's of what works for the big explosion but not in a open forum. Providers luv a good DATY.followed by good sex, cuddling and caressing.

The hobby is fun and for now I don't need the big explosion each and every time.
Most BJs really feel great but will not get me their, it is just part of life..

Guys this is actually a great thread. For one, there is a lot of biology involved. I read tons of books for fun and for work. My head started to hurt studying how our bodies use adenosine triphosphate to produce energy.

Anyway there is a lot to the T thing. A lot.

Now that said my T is about depleted right now and I need a break. I can't fill two covers anymore. I have a hard time filling one cover right now. It will bounce back.

So let me talk about T and the science of why in simple ass cave man terms.

1). Men produce T and we need it for vigor, strength, and sex. Women need T too (a whole lot less) and they get it from our saliva and semen. Women make E, and we need it too. Same transfer conduits.

2). My wife is 8 mo preggo with a girl. I'm sleeping for shit and her E levels are off the charts. It reduces my T and gives me more E.

3). I've been doing a lot of kissing and other things lately, increasing my E and depleting my T. DATY is probably and E bonanza.

4). I had a minor wrist injury that had me not lifting weights for a while. Weightlifting stimulates T production.

For me, I need to get back to the gym (way down after so got preggo), get that kid here to reduce her E lvls and mine, and I need to share my T less.

OG sent me a hilarious PM one day telling me I was going to wear my Dick out before 50, which made me laugh out loud in front of SO. I redirected thank goodness. While not completely true it is possible.

Biology and T are wonderful things. I had a run of spreading T all over for about a month and it has caught up to me. I'm gonna have to slow down, get this kid born, eat right and hit the gym to reload. I cannot take T supplements thanks to rules of a sport I participate in or I'd look into it. I may have to start looking into herbal ways to raise it. Men need T. This hobby is actually a great outlet to reduce T.

So yes somedays everything is fireworks and Roman candles, other days not so much. Filling covers is hard enough, and filling them with depleted T levels is an exercise in futility. I've regressed from filling covers to CIM now, and even that isn't as miraculous as it once was. I will rebuild my T and find the right balance. It will be more fun for me and for the ladies that way.

How the F was that for honest?

Well, I'm the opposite. I'm in my 40's and I lose my mojo everytime with a cover. But with a BJ, I can stay up for hours. Providers rarely ask for a reduced rate for an L2 session anymore, they all ask full donation. No discount for FBSM/DFK/L2 only and that really sucks. Nothing like paying 300 roses or 500 roses for doubles just for CIM.

I have learned that nerves and anxiety play a big part in losing a woody too but in your case, diabetic neuropathy takes a different careplan altogether. Good luck to you OldGrump. Hope you get the help you need.

My libido has slowed waaaay down in the past few years, and guess what? I'm fine with it! You suggested tongue-in-cheek that you may need to take up another hobby, but that is exactly what I've done. It's nice to be able to talk with friends, family and coworkers about my interests for a change.

I still check in here most days, and occasionally get a wild hair to check out a new chick, but by and large I'm happy that my dick isn't making all my decisions for
me. Originally Posted by TinMan

I was reluctant to post this for fear of ridicule and being accused of just being a worn out old man. I am touched and gratified by the enormous amount of support and information from everyone. Thank you all.

TinMan you always give great insight on issues you address. Yes, I have other hobbies and may devote more time to them. As you said, there isn't much you can discuss about this one with your real life friends and family.

On the plus side, I've learned to open up about sexual discussions and it has perked some interest in my SO. I showed her a picture of the Liberator Flip Cushion (which I learned about on this board) and she delightfully bought in to its purchase. It came yesterday along with a vibrator we didn't discuss. I'm saving that as a surprise when we have our first "pillow session".

Testosterone is something I have not had checked. I hope to correct that today.

All we need now is Tara and this thread will be complete!

Sweet old gump (you sound like my kind of guy.) I would recommend trying one of the actual massage therapist around here that specialize in ED. I'm not just saying that because that's my specialty, I'm saying it because it works. There are very different techniques to use on ED and men who have sexual challenges. VERY different. In a session of that sort, an orgasm is not the ultimate goal. It's great when it happens, but it's equally as great when it doesn't. Whether or not you can finish doesn't change the fact you still require touch and the filling of that place deep in your soul, no one else can reach. Don't give up. Answers are out here.

It's been my experience that when you stop just going for the ending and really walk the journey, it will increase your chances of orgasm by many fold.

I recommend Dharma, Vnurse, Terra Lynn, and ebony angel. Those girls are simply amazing. ESPECIALLY if you tell them exactly what you're going through.




.

Take 2 blue pills, get a good BBBJ, and you will feel better in the morning.

At 73 I have problems as well...While "old shorty" is not dead, he tends to have a mind of his own sometimes... I can't use the Viagra type meds simply because me and momma don't do that anymore....

I did the next best thing and that was to try to get my weight under control by watching what I eat and doing what exercise I can... I use breathing oxygen now so that limits me as well....


Having said all that, I have found better success at the Spas.... Go in and get a great massage with a lot of touching and it seems I do better with that situation... Also, some girls get me hotter than others....


Most of us are in the winter of our lives and I found I just had to change accordingly.... So far so good.... I leave my ego at the door and if Shorty helps me out great... If not, I still get a great massage, spend quality time with a beautiful young girl so it's still pretty good over all....Bottom line for me, I'm still gonna do this as long as I can get my decrepit old ass to a provider of some sort... Beats sitting home and farting on a pillow.....

I just had a wondeful lady get me there again. She was milftastic , sweet, and determined. I'm still drained and need a break though. I'm taking a two week break, and adding weights back to my running since the wrist is better. Low T is a real thing. I was reading something about some horrible chemical in plastic and other crap that messes up men's T production. It also.sounded like a fat rich diet and zinc may help. Good fats, fish, olive oils, nuts, and high qualtiy meat. I bet blue pills are crazy fun, but I don't want to go.that route for now. I may want one for my birthday party though......

Thanks to everyone for this information and open discussion.

Take 2 blue pills, get a good BBBJ, and you will feel better in the morning. Originally Posted by Bestman200600

LOL That is such an appropriate response the day after Obamacare kicks in.

Sweet old gump (you sound like my kind of guy.) I would recommend trying one of the actual massage therapist around here that specialize in ED. I'm not just saying that because that's my specialty, I'm saying it because it works. There are very different techniques to use on ED and men who have sexual challenges. VERY different. In a session of that sort, an orgasm is not the ultimate goal. It's great when it happens, but it's equally as great when it doesn't. Whether or not you can finish doesn't change the fact you still require touch and the filling of that place deep in your soul, no one else can reach. Don't give up. Answers are out here.

It's been my experience that when you stop just going for the ending and really walk the journey, it will increase your chances of orgasm by many fold.

I recommend Dharma, Vnurse, Terra Lynn, and ebony angel. Those girls are simply amazing. ESPECIALLY if you tell them exactly what you're going through.

. Originally Posted by LovingKayla

Thank you Kayla. You should be on that list too. I must have done my homework because I've seen those you listed except for Terry Lynn and you. All wonderful intelligent ladies who are masters in their field.

One thing in common is a long drive (except for Ebony Angel. She was one of my first hobby visits and a very sweet girl). The frustration of traffic and construction can ruin the mental preparation. I try to keep the drive time to less than 30 minutes if I can.

Hang in there old grump!

I hope it gets better for you.