This is for the ladies, but I am curious as to what you men have to say....

Hi Kendall, I understand why you contemplated this for several weeks before posting. It is a touchy subject. Heck, there is one provider I haven't heard back from since November AND I never heard back from the gent. Go figure. Since then, I don't contact her when a gent uses her as reference. I skip to the next provider never telling the gent.

I come from the point of view that this is the hobby. Most gents like variety. They want to experience different types and styles of ladies on here. More power to them. We are not their spouse/girlfriend. Gents help gents with reviews/intel. Providers help providers stay safe by providing references. It gets "messed up" when we, as providers, take it personally if a gent would like to partake in someone new. That's when a lady won't respond to reference request. Or tells the gent to come see her instead. Her feelings are hurt and she is personally wounded. It's not personal it's the lifestyle of the hobby. My hope is gents recognize and appreciate when a provider gives a reference. Without making them feel like they have to go see her instead of the one he wants to visit. (P411 is your friend)

Naming names will make a drama filled thread full of name calling and denials. Maybe even all out war. Which, I would love to read when my life is boring or I wanna feel better about myself. Then I could say to myself, hey, at least I don't do that. Feel proud for just a brief moment in time *giggle* Then back to real life and see how flawed I am.

I will name names of providers that stand out to me. Top of the list for outstanding in giving reference to me * Italian Princess * I even told her she should teach a class.
The following ladies are personable and professional in giving references. AngelaS, Reese Foster, Lana Warren, Fawn, AmberRain. They also happen to be tops in popularity. I can see why based on the way they TCB.

Are these "certain" women not very active? Or do they log in everyday here and have thousands of posts?

I don't usually ask for names. But if there's women who don't want to play the game then it would be helpful for us guys to know WHO not to use as a reference. So enlighten us with the name of a stingy lady or two please. Originally Posted by Hercules

Here, here!

I'm not working in the hobby these days, I last saw a client right around Christmas, and I've had guys that I last saw nearly a year ago use me as a reference that I KNOW good and well have seen other ladies because I have seen them write reviews, and given countless references for them, as well as made phone calls FOR THEM trying to get them a girl to go see them when I couldn't.

I was actually just updating my profile to leave a note for the ladies and gents about this very topic of references...I feel awful coming along weeks to months later saying...oh, sorry...that guy should have used someone else because it's been months, to years since he's seen me, and he's an active hobbiest...I mean, really now.

I'm sorry ladies get all bitchy and greedy - and believe me - there are the Deejah's of the world that will get your call or email, and turn right around and call that client to offer them a "better deal" trying to take your biz. (Oh, and I had suspicions for years, but that's cool...I still got plenty of REPEAT biz...no worries...)

This is why I just LOVED P411 and don't like fussing with the one on one of direct contact with the ladies most of the time.

Good luck y'all.

And guys - don't use me as a reference. I'm not around these days.

Happy Hobbying!

Kendall, get p411. It'll cut down your time on screening.

I ask the hobbyists who wish to visit me to have their references forward an an email to my gmail account.

The forwarded message provides me with the hobbyist's email address, as well as the provider's (so that I can easily verify/cross-reference the legitimacy of each through their contact details). The message often gives me an idea of how he presents himself to the ladies he's seen before and demonstrates a type of behavior... how he treats, addresses or speaks to her. Gives me an idea about what is important to him or stands out in his mind from the time spent together OR gives me an idea of the image he has of himself (because he will often include a tid-bit about a session or details about his appearance or behavior or personal information to jog her memory).

Once I've received the forwarded message and have verified the info/identities of those involved, I let the guy know that his screening is complete or ask for more information.

If an extended amount of time passes and I receive no forwarded messages and no further inquiries, I figure his reference has made him an offer he can't refuse. More power to her. As much as this Hobby is about financial livelihood for many women, it wouldn't exist if hobbyists weren't looking for a good time and to have their egos stroked. If another lady shows him that good time or strokes him the right way, then the Hobby is fulfilling its purpose. Of course the fella won't get to enjoy all of the ways I can stroke him or experience how good time with me can be, but someone else will come along and have all of that for himself and the guy who never made it past his reference can read all about it later...

If he hasn't heard from me after an extended amount of time, I can tell him that the lady he thought would put in a good word for him has not done so when he inquires about the progress of the screening. It saves me the frustration of trying to get a ref from a lady who wishes not to give it as well as the dread of even trying whenever some certain lady's name is offered again and again. Best of all, I don't have to tattle on the ladies who don't play nice.... They tattle on themselves.

Let the gentlemen know his references aren't checking out and why. Let him light a fire to have them call you back or find out if they're still active. If that doesnt work he'll at least know not to use them as references anymore.

One of the reasons i see mostly mature providers is, in my experience, the level of service goes far beyond just the time spent.

I agree 411 is the way to go. Although, every time someone does ask for a reference I try and get back to them ASAP.

Now, if I ever ask for a reference most of the time might take the provider a week or more to get back to me (if at all). I figure they are just super busy. For me P411 is the way to go.

Hugs!

Aren't okays on P411 not enough?

Actually no.

L.E. can be and is on P411 with profiles just as well as providers. If you go off of just looking at a gent's profile and see he has a few okays without actually speaking to the provider and knowing who she is, that can be dangerous.

Also, just because we gave the guy an "okay" doesn't mean that he was a fun/polite/sane person. We give the guy an "okay" simply stating that yes, we visited with that person. The next provider must contact us personally for details,or, a reference on that person. An "okay" simply means we saw that person, not that, we would necessarily see that person again.

....just my 0.02 cents.....

Stay safe ladies and I always give references when I can help out!

She already has p411, folks. Kendall's post is therefore directed to the verification of non-p411 members.

I give "ok's" on P411 only if I would see the guy again. I do not give them to everyone I have seen. Ok means just what it says "he was ok". If he wasn't "ok" then too bad for him. He better learn some manners or practice better hygeine or whatever his "offense" was. JMHO

I have P411 as well.

Some gents don't have P411. Some gents don't realize Gina doesn't have to have your personal info if two ladies vouch for you. Two ladies vouch=6months free on P411. An added bonus-----Lots of ladies on P411 aren't on Eccie. New shopping LOL

When a lady checks a gents okays on P411, it is up to her whether she wants to contact those providers for more info. It's a tool. Not foolproof. Gina even suggest ladies do their own due diligence.

You have P411 gents
Eccie members who use references
Lurkers who have references

Good point!

This is an ongoing problem and some ladies are very good about supplying references and others are less than helpful. What gets to me is when I supply a lady with references because I dont use 411 and probably will never join that group. But I will give a lady three to four very well known ladies and they my references never hear from the new provider. WTF??? I contact a lady, want to set up an appointment, give them easy to reach and reliable references and then nothing ever comes from my attempt to set something up. Maybe the ladies are much busier and the economy is stronger than I think!

Now Party on, Play nice and Happy 4th of July and morn the loss of Andy Griffith

Oh, man, we lost Andy? Dang, I hate to hijack the thread, but that's a big loss for us 40 something and beyond fellas.

Dang, dang, dang, dang. Well, here's hoping everyone will promptly respond to reference requests for the remainder of the year in honor of Andy. He would have wanted it that way, so do it for Andy.

RIP, Sheriff Taylor!

I disagree. Some providers NEVER respond. Wish they would, but some just don't, for whatever reason..... Happy fourth!!!!!!!!!!!!!

To be honest, I don't use provider reference to verify...that's why there are reviews and p411.
Sometimes when asked for a reference...I'm not given enough details to remember who the person is...but if I can, I always give references.