To the gents - Whats your fee if roles were reversed

So does that mean you wouldn't open up the door for me, you don't have to stick your tongue up my ass. I pinkie swear.

If the provider/hobbyist roles were actually reversed for one week, I bet you would never see a hobbyist come on here and gripe about a girl that is YMMV ever again. As soon as the guy opens his incall door and a sweaty Roseanne Barr walks in and asks him to put his tongue up her ass, I bet he will gain a whole new perspective on a ladies right to a little mileage variance. Originally Posted by broes

You drive a hard bargain, up-selling for BFE, geez, no kleenex huh? how will you wipe my tears of joys when I have the big O, please don't say your gym socks.

If I don't pass the peep hole screening, im screwed, can I put my boob on the peep hole instead, that should help right?

I will work for tips.

Screening is done through the peephole, If I don't open you didn't pass.

Cim is ymmv depending on cleanliness and whether you treat me like a gentleman.

BFE is an upcharge, as is cuddling, holding or providing a shoulder to cry on. Bring your own damn kleenex. This isn't match.com

no msog on sessions under an hour and nothing up my butt. Originally Posted by monkmonk

Ah, what the hell, Lisa. Book for two hours, and I'll throw in the mustache rides for free. That's right, I said rides. I'm a MOOG kind of guy.

I'm pretty sure you'd find me curled up in a fetal position on the floor of the hotel rhythmically chanting "find your happy place" over and over with Pink Floyd blaring in the background and my arms clutching a half empty bottle of Jack Daniels if I had y'alls job for one week.

I'm pretty sure you'd find me curled up in a fetal position on the floor of the hotel methodically chanting "find your happy place" over and over with Pink Floyd blaring in the background and my arms clutching a half empty bottle of Jack Daniels if I had y'alls job for one week. Originally Posted by Shackleton

that is probably closer to the truth

"comfortably numb" on repeat

Now that I have you attention, let me introduce myself. My name is Jasser Short-Stroke and I have the chorizo to fill your taco. I'm a highly refined gentlemen that enjoys natural light on a hot summer day. I'm 5'9" with brown eyes and a smile like the sunrise.

I can be a soft sensual lover, take my time, and blow in 1 minute or I can be the hardcore PSE type and last 25 seconds. See my rates below.


15 minute cream & scream $5.89
Regular 1/2 hour session (non BFE) $25.46
1 HR (BFE Light) $51.00
1 HR (BFE) $102.83
1 HR (BFE & light kissing) $110.02
1 HR (BFE & sensual kissing) $123.00
1 HR (massage only) $15.50
1 HR (massage & digits) $20.27
1 HR (massage & DATY only) $35.26
1 HR (massage & BFE light) $86.29
1 HR (massage & BFE) $93.78

Please add 75 cents for DATO (shower first please)

Sorry girls, no Greek!

I do require screening!!! My number is 867-5309. When my momma answers, she will do the screening. Only call if you want an appointment! I'm not here to make friends or chat; time is money, honey!

I cater to fetishes which include, but not limited to: role play, tampon sucking, water sports, etc. There is just too many to list!

100% me or it's free! 100% D&D free!

***DISCLAIMER***
This not an offer for prostitution. Any money exchanged is for my time only. If you are cop, please let me know upon calling.

200 flat fee per hr, orgasm in my mouth avavilable and your cooch and in your bunghole=MSOG, (prefer no bunghole though) mish, doggie till you get sore provided, lol. (dato available to one person only, im not tellin who), shower available, fresh towels, man soap only and it smells like grass or motor oil your choice, no feminine beauty supplie available, a good f_ckin always provided, age, race unimportant. Please come sqeaky clean to your appt, as I will be, nothing goes in my ass, screening based on eccie hobbyist intel. Spray whip and strawberries will be on hand, light dom is ok, both ways, no fake orgasms permitted, body shots with multiples get 50 dollars off anytime. (above is for which no money is exchanged.)

I would charge $1000 per hour, with an "If the pic's not me, it's free" proviso. Since the pic would be of Brad Pitt, I'd expect quite a bit of business but not too much in the way of a profit (except for the occasional very nearsighted or extremely kind hearted client who might just think I chose to use an old photo and allow me to keep the gift as some of the guys on the board occasionally do under similar, though reversed, circumstances).

I am crying from laughing. That was hilarious

I'll take HR massage with BFE lite. Hold the DATO

Hey your mom is not going to be there when I get there right?. But hey if she is hot, she can join it, im into to MILF's, how much extra for that.

Dude did you say tampon sucking?, LMAO!!!!!!!!!

Now that I have you attention, let me introduce myself. My name is Jasser Short-Stroke and I have the chorizo to fill your taco. I'm a highly refined gentlemen that enjoys natural light on a hot summer day. I'm 5'9" with brown eyes and a smile like the sunrise.

I can be a soft sensual lover, take my time, and blow in 1 minute or I can be the hardcore PSE type and last 25 seconds. See my rates below.


15 minute cream & scream $5.89
Regular 1/2 hour session (non BFE) $25.46
1 HR (BFE Light) $51.00
1 HR (BFE) $102.83
1 HR (BFE & light kissing) $110.02
1 HR (BFE & sensual kissing) $123.00
1 HR (massage only) $15.50
1 HR (massage & digits) $20.27
1 HR (massage & DATY only) $35.26
1 HR (massage & BFE light) $86.29
1 HR (massage & BFE) $93.78

Please add 75 cents for DATO (shower first please)

Sorry girls, no Greek!

I do require screening!!! My number is 867-5309. When my momma answers, she will do the screening. Only call if you want an appointment! I'm not here to make friends or chat; time is money, honey!

I cater to fetishes which include, but not limited to: role play, tampon sucking, water sports, etc. There is just too many to list!

100% me or it's free! 100% D&D free!

***DISCLAIMER***
This not an offer for prostitution. Any money exchanged is for my time only. If you are cop, please let me know upon calling. Originally Posted by Jasser

Oh Dear God please don't let anyone post a showcase.

Grass or motor oil..damn..well i'll take motor oil

Hey you meant no fake orgasms from you right??? LMAO!

200 flat fee per hr, orgasm in my mouth avavilable and your cooch and in your bunghole=MSOG, (prefer no bunghole though) mish, doggie till you get sore provided, lol. (dato available to one person only, im not tellin who), shower available, fresh towels, man soap only and it smells like grass or motor oil your choice, no feminine beauty supplie available, a good f_ckin always provided, age, race unimportant. Please come sqeaky clean to your appt, as I will be, nothing goes in my ass, screening based on eccie hobbyist intel. Spray whip and strawberries will be on hand, light dom is ok, both ways, no fake orgasms permitted, body shots with multiples get 50 dollars off anytime. (above is for which no money is exchanged.) Originally Posted by lilsmurf

Now that was funny!

I would charge $1000 per hour, with an "If the pic's not me, it's free" proviso. Since the pic would be of Brad Pitt, I'd expect quite a bit of business but not too much in the way of a profit (except for the occasional very nearsighted or extremely kind hearted client who might just think I chose to use an old photo and allow me to keep the gift as some of the guys on the board occasionally do under similar, though reversed, circumstances). Originally Posted by eccienewbie

My stomach hurts from laughing, its nice to know you guys are creative with your words. Keep the responses coming and where did the ladies go?

I am usually fairly sarcastic, so for once I will be out of character. A female comedian once commented about not wanting natural childbirth because, as she put it, she would not even want to do something that felt good for five straight hours. My point is this; I like sex. I could not imagine taking something I like this much and doing it three or four times a day, four or five time a week. For any price. Not to mention, how would I charge for equipment that only worked for the first couple of clients? I would be L3 for about an hour, then it would be L2 for the rest. You girls rock.

If the provider/hobbyist roles were actually reversed for one week, I bet you would never see a hobbyist come on here and gripe about a girl that is YMMV ever again. As soon as the guy opens his incall door and a sweaty Roseanne Barr walks in and asks him to put his tongue up her ass, I bet he will gain a whole new perspective on a ladies right to a little mileage variance. Originally Posted by broes

i think we need to hire the guys to write our ads for us

$1.79, but I only offer overnighters.