As a provider I have sometimes wondered why some gents like other girls and not me. The bottom line-I don't do it for them. And-so what? Guys have the choice to make who they spend their hard-earned $$$ with, and ladies have a choice who they choose to see and who not. It goes both ways. For the guys-there is a mighty plethera of hot girls with great tcb and service, so if I were a hobbyist faced with the delima that provider x shot me down, then I would simply say, "NEXT!" and just move on. As a provider-I have to question what about me is not as appealing as other ladies, step up my game and evaluate how I look, what I'm doing, how I advertise, etc. if I am wanting to attract more biz. The bottom line is you can't please everyone. Just have as much fun as you can with those you click with and enjoy yourself because that's what it's all about. As far as people not feeling comfortable to post, and guys not feeling comfortable with posting reviews-you have your OWN reasons. You don't have to explain them to anyone. No one is hobbying with your wallet, your personal interests, or aspects of your life that you need to protect, etc. And for the ladies that do or don't see certain guys-it's their bodies, there perogative, their decision. I have had heard of girls explain a number of different "prejudices" or "standards" that dictate who they will and won't see for xyz reason. Some to me are valid, others-not so much. You basically can't argue with free-will or need to explain yourself to anyone. Originally Posted by Devynn von Tease
What she said!! THG, you know that I love ya...you have been so kind to me. I don't really think I fully understand the question or dilemma that you are having, but I think that you should do what YOU are comfortable with and don't worry about the other stuff! It's been awhile since I saw you, and you know a lot about me and my "stuff" over the years. You chose to be a friend from a distance to avoid enabling me and that is understandable and shows how great you are.
DVT, I often feel the same way...not "fresh meat" anymore...got a bad rep for awhile of which I earned all on my own so will take even longer to rebulid my credibility again, but I'm doing it. What I don't get, however, is how or WHY other providers make decisions to see or not see a hobbyist based on who else they see or whatever, especially if it is a provider that she has never even met. It's her choice, of course, but sometimes it seems a little shallow.
I have several clients that ask me what I think about so and so or who I would recommend for XYZ...and sometimes they even mention a provider by name. I NEVER have and NEVER WILL say anything that could be harmful to another provider as that is not my place and just isn't good business. Many providers, from what I have heard, feel that they are "protecting" clients from certain providers by "warning them" and say things that are damaging to another provider and her reputation. That provider...and I know this from personal experience...doesn't need help damaging her reputation. BUT, what if that provider turns her life around and gets back on track and in time, she proves it and those that have known her for awhile actually see those changes...yet has to deal with others that are constantly downing her without ever having met her or knowing the situation at hand?? It's just not cool!
Ummm...wow, I think I got way off track there but oddly enough feel better after having said that...lol. My point, I think, is that it is what it is. Everyone is free to do as they please. We have to live with the consequences of our actions, and although it often DOES affect us (as it obviously does you, THG), we have to remember that often times it is "their issue" and whether we like it or not, they are entitled to have them. It's very hard for me to overcome some of my mistakes but I can't complain as I did it to myself. It IS up to me, however, to change that behavior and try to avoid those actions that got me to "that place" but also have to accept that some may choose to get over it and decide to enjoy my company while others may not! And there are too many fish in the sea...many a lot younger, tighter, and hotter than myself...to choose from so I can't...and don't...blame them. As for the other stuff, I'm not in certain "cliques" or whatever...okay...I'll live. I don't get a second or third or fourth chance to meet some great guys based on my actions in the past, that's what I get. BUT, if other providers choose not to see someone because of me or decide they don't like me for whatever reason, that is their choice but that also speaks volumes about their character and probably wouldn't make the best of friends for me anyway.
So, I feel like I just got some unnecessary comments (perhaps even unrelated to this thread) off of my chest. But when I see a GREAT guy start a thread about how he is worrying about whether he is right or wrong to do whatever...and I guess it makes me step outside of the box and say something (should take my own advice). If you don't want to post reviews, don't...if you do but are worried that other providers may turn you down in the future because of it, decide how you will feel about that as they are probably not worth it! Knowing you, an ugly disposition can turn even the most beautiful of women into a very ugly person...so that's just my opinion.
I apologize if this post turned into an opportunity to get some things off of my chest but the goal WAS to add to this thread. Whispers, I was going to PM you and have been thinking about it, but I am going to go out on a limb here...I realize that I am in no way at all your type and have never met you before yet have heard some not-so-great things about you. BUT, I just want to say that I agree with your posts probably about 99% of the time (the ones I have read anyway) and THAT statement right there just earned me a few more "points" against me from a few others, but it's TRUE!
And here it comes........