Discovered GF is a Provider

Missy Mariposa's Avatar
I also want to suggest therapy. I'm a huge stickler for honesty in a relationships - I like to say I can handle everything *but* lying. But sometimes, for that right person, you can get past it. I wouldn't be so quick to give up.

I've never withheld my provider status from a partner (male or female), and I won't even consider pursuing anyone who I don't know (up front) is okay with it. While I'm of the belief this is just a job like any other, I realise and accept others do not share my views. It's only fair to any lovers I were to take to be completely honest with them up front.
BigOil's Avatar
White Chocolate, no she wouldn't admit it. Said my evidence was fabricated and based on suspicion and false intuition. Turned it around and tried to make me out to be paranoid-delusional. I know what I know. Her angle is plausible deniability. Her "real job" and her network is diabolically genius.

If I'd married her, she wouldn't have stopped. She knows I make a really good living and could have bankrolled her lifestyle. She's addicted, and apparently a pathological liar.
pyramider's Avatar
Don't bother ... just move on.
BigOil's Avatar
Perhaps this isn't the appropriate forum. Thank you all for your insight and advice. It is greatly appreciated.
whitechocolate's Avatar
A good therapist can work with just about anyone if they are willing to show up and are motivated to be in the relationship. Yes, this is not the best forum because these situations are far to complex for one line solutions that will help you.
TechOne's Avatar
White Chocolate, no she wouldn't admit it. Said my evidence was fabricated and based on suspicion and false intuition. Turned it around and tried to make me out to be paranoid-delusional. I know what I know. Her angle is plausible deniability. Her "real job" and her network is diabolically genius.

If I'd married her, she wouldn't have stopped. She knows I make a really good living and could have bankrolled her lifestyle. She's addicted, and apparently a pathological liar. Originally Posted by BigOil
Hard to believe that her "real job" and network are that diabolically genius...there is no such entity that can explain the alone time with clients...in that manner...not even Dorrell with Petrino as part of her job...
BigOil's Avatar
Giteneny, it is genius. Trust me. It's so legitimate on the surface. It's foolproof. Totally undetectable. Even better, it's legitimate aspect is an additional income source while providing the perfect front with built in time and location alibi for a provider.
KatieKatie's Avatar
I wonder how many providers were peeing there pants waiting for this thread to load!
BigOil's Avatar
Providers, PM me if you want details.
I know a girl that worked in a hotel as a manager and pulled this off pretty nicely. You would be surprised.
  • MrGiz
  • 04-20-2012, 09:25 PM
So.... I'm taking a wild guess here... I see that you just signed up today.
Was it evidence of this website, left unsecured, which tipped you off? If not... why sign up here, today, to make this announcement?

If you were already a hobbyist... and y'all were as close as you say... isn't it just a tad bit hypocritical of either one of you to say you cannot accept each other's position?

If she's "The One".... the Hobby shouldn't matter... not given your pre-enjoyment of it... same goes for her... just my opinion...

Best of Luck...
BigOil's Avatar
This website is immaterial to our situation. She isn't on here. She gets business in other ways. Ive been on here in the past, when single. I never hobbbied while with her, or any other relationship. She won't admit to it, so without transparency, it can't be resolved.
  • MrGiz
  • 04-20-2012, 09:45 PM
So.... to be clear.... you have admitted playing the hobby to her , right?

Did she know, previously?

just curious...
BigOil's Avatar
It didnt come up. If she'd asked, I would have told her.

@ asterik: EVERY provider should have a friend in the hotel biz!
  • MrGiz
  • 04-20-2012, 10:08 PM
Ahhhh , I see... clear now...

Good Luck... hope both of y'all find a way to continue to keep a smile on...