Living with former provider

Ms. Athena's Avatar
I had a over 3 year long affair with a hobbiest. I broke ALL my rules and was left with nothing for my time....I will continue to be friends with hobbies. Butt ALL BCD will be on the clock. If your boss called and said come into work early oh butt it's off the clock....you'd be H3ll Naw
Alyssa XOXO's Avatar
Good luck with that OP...
My SO used to be in the business in a city other than Houston. My former wife is a lawyer who had my SO investigated. She threatened to provide the information to family members and my business clients. She made very difficult demands on my SO to avoid these disclosures and pictures her investigators found. Things were difficult for a long period of time. Originally Posted by SD7
Sounds like your ex was just itching to get disbarred and put in jail for extortion....
@owlman, It’s a small world after all or y’all visit spots from her past or she was really well known.
  • SD7
  • 12-05-2019, 11:40 AM
She has pictures and other information that she could give to relatives of mine. My SO's relatives, including her daughter, also do not know about what she did. The lawfirm where my wife works is one of the biggest and most influential firms.

Getting around things has not been easy. My SO and I have had to do some unpleasant things.
boardman's Avatar
She has pictures and other information that she could give to relatives of mine. My SO's relatives, including her daughter, also do not know about what she did. The lawfirm where my wife works is one of the biggest and most influential firms.

Getting around things has not been easy. My SO and I have had to do some unpleasant things. Originally Posted by SD7

I agree with Deereman. What she did is Extortion...The practice of obtaining something through force or threats. Her law firm would not have been pleased.

Unless you are in the public eye or your business caters exclusively to the religious right you had more on her than she had on you.
Furthermore, why not come clean about your SO. Isn't a person entitled to redemption?
Totally agree with Boardman on this one. Show your divorce attorney the paper trail of your ex-wife attempting to contact relatives showing what your SO does (or did in the past) and the Texas Bar will immediately launch an investigation, possible suspension of license, and disciplinary action. All which means she won't be able to do her job as Lawyer and won't have an income.
pyramider's Avatar
The lawfirm where my wife works is one of the biggest and most influential firms.
. Originally Posted by SD7



This falls into the category called Load Of Crap.
Man up and own it. Don’t run, hide, relocate, etc. The bigger issue with dating a provider is not her past volume of dudes and profession, it’s the provider mindset that never turns off. They keep that provider mentality for life.
eveonastick's Avatar
Ehh, screw all that. We're supposed to have fun. Don't get personal. No religion. No politics. There's so much random hilarious b/s and flirting to be had. There's no reason to even initiate texting or relations. You don't know what's going on in their actual lives (unless announced/OK'd). Keep it discreet period. If you don't mind having arrangements/dating a pro. Please respect the privacy and confidentiality on both parts. Also, please make a very patient, cognitive, and educated decision. Truth be told we're all fun, but a tad maladjusted. Pick a truly decent counterpart. No offense to jaded ladies and gents, but! I wasn't aware this was a dating site. Just an observation.
Max Rax's Avatar
Just roll with the punches. I was married to a ex client for 6 years(no longer married). Never had anyone approach us. On the other hand I’ve recognized many gents in public I’m assuming with their wives or maybe one of the lovely ladies from here.
These matters can create serious issues based on one's profession and based on family relationships.
My wife of 20 years was a "fun" girl before she met me.
I've been on both sides of the equation. About 12 years ago I saw a gal that was very low volume provider just trying to make ends meet to get through college. After a while this became more of a sugar baby-lite situation. We dated, I helped her out. She had no time for a "real" relationship, so I was as much of a surrogate for he as she was to me. When she finally got a degree and a job with a public face things got a bit complicated. I accidentally met her mother and sister when they showed up unannounced. I was also on a first-name basis with her neighbor. When we were out together we had a few times we either ran into people she knew, or ones I knew.