How sad. I don't know how much of that is true, but I suspect quite a bit.You always write such wonderful things! Oh, and I'm a Libra, too!
Being an older lady when I started (age 47) might have been a good thing socially; I had an active life with lots of people in it before, and still do. A few of them know my current profession, and shock long ago gave way to fascination since I am so far from the stereotype. Probably helps that I have liberal arts and theatrical connections, as those minds are more open to alternate lifestyles. I do occasionally get the incredulous, "I can't believe you actually make enough money to live on from this full time!" I invest the best of myself in everything I do, so why wouldn't I expect a decent return? Those who can't handle the truth just get a different version of my reality.
I don't think I'm much competition to most ladies on here, and that statement has nothing to do with my self esteem. I just chose from the beginning to attract a different clientele for the most part, and not everything I do is confined to a few short hours in the bedroom. Some gentlemen desire physical (and not even necessarily sexual) AND emotional connections, so contact doesn't end when they leave my presence, and many times I spend most of a date fully clothed, just enjoying mutual companionship. I don't get weirded out if gentlemen treat me nicely; I kind of expect it because most people will reciprocate in kind with the way they are treated. Of course I like to be spoiled (perfect choice of career for that), but I'm always very appreciative. I don't take advantage of kind gentlemen; there are fellows on here who have offered much when they knew things were a bit difficult for me, but I never accepted. My Irish pride would slap me sideways. It would never occur to me to treat gentlemen as doormats, or gossip and say unkind or untrue things about other providers. I have too much respect for others, and having been treated badly (as everyone has at some point), I remember how that stung, so why would I want to hurt another person similarly? Spite? What a waste of time and energy. I'm obviously intelligent enough to get a "real job," as are most of the ladies on ECCIE, I think, if they wanted to put forth that effort. But most of us like being fully in charge of our jobs and schedules, not because of laziness, but because we work better without Big Brother Bosses looking over our shoulders.
I see good in everyone (which can be a flaw, I realize, if not balanced with caution), and the physical traits of attractiveness never much mattered in the first place to me, so the only things that really "gross me out" and turn me off now are bad hygiene, disrespect, and lack of dependability, aka NSNC.
Perhaps it has something to do with my being a Libra and a lucky Irish lassie; things in my life are pretty balanced. However, wouldn't bother me to have trouble balancing my checkbook because I was dealing with lots of large numbers. Originally Posted by Fancyinheels
Very good post Outdoorsman. I've been curious about this myself. I'm sure most providers live a very secluded life. Most of there real friends probably are in the hobby in one form or another. Too many judgemental people out there to share and open book life. I'm sure it has to eat at the soul of a person to hide the fact of what they do from their family. Originally Posted by rrabbit6926It's the other way around for me. I have one real friend in the hobby and the rest are in my personal life. It's very hard to trust people in the hobby --- and for good reason.
Every provider I have known that explains why she provides, tells that "She enjoys it" Yes, the ladies enjoy some limited sessions but really it is work for them. I have learned that the providers I have befriended cosely do not enjoy seeing 10 different men in a given week. They enjoy the cash! There is a level of shame when we engage in this Hobby, both for men and women, that simple. We make up BS excuses to help console ourselves, but it is all lies to ourself. "MY SO does not do CIM, so I hobby." or "How else do I pay my bills?" or "I like beautiful women, so why not?" or "God would not have given me this body if I were not to make money with it."This is one of the most outstanding posts I have ever read.
All BS we tell ourselves, me included. But this is a selfish hobby, I want great sex, that civilian ladies just will not do consistently. She wants a BMW and not a Tercel. Very selfish.
Providers are human, but must act when with us, she has no idea which one of us will write a review. I am not special to her at all.
Most providers I know have children, do the school thing, but have very few real friends. Even amongst the ladies they must always be on guard. Ladies will sabotage each other for my money. Men lie to them about everything!!! So, a provider in my expereince with some time in the job is very cautious when I just do something nice, wondering what I want out of her? Nothing, I do nice things for others with no expectations, that simple. Then providers tend to think they can take advantage of me, lol. Always trying to get more for less, just like any other salesman. No balance IMHO.
My experience tells me Providing is a very lonely business, and when a guy helps she tends to think he is doornmat or sucker. Which to me indicates low self esteem on the providers part (why does this guy want to help me? He only likes my looks, not my brain or soul. I am not smart enough to get a good paying job, etc). Makes sense to me, she has a job she cannot talk about openly, usually hides from her mother and kids, and she meets with some really gross men that turn her off completely.
Me I do not know if I could have sex with 65 year old 250 pound women on a consistent basis and make it fun for her. It is a real job, my hats off to you ladies. Originally Posted by Outdoorsman
This is one of the most outstanding posts I have ever read.
I have no friends, either in or outside the hobby. Originally Posted by charlestudor2005
It is now 5:30 AM. I just got back from being outside and freezing my ass off. Why was I outside? My 3 dogs needed to go the restroom. LOL!Did all three have to go at the same time? what if you somehow found out that they don't like you watching them, lol. Ya know one night you get pretty drunk and the oldest dog comes up to ya and Says " Ah Miki look, the next time were out pinching a loaf how about just looking the other way alright. There is some modesty here ya know, lol.
Nope, I am not just getting in from a party. LOL! Originally Posted by mikkifine
Other misconceptions about providers are there drug addicts, have a pimp, so they use tricking to support there habit or pimp. Originally Posted by shorty
Did all three have to go at the same time? what if you somehow found out that they don't like you watching them, lol. Ya know one night you get pretty drunk and the oldest dog comes up to ya and Says " Ah Miki look, the next time were out pinching a loaf how about just looking the other way alright. There is some modesty here ya know, lol. Originally Posted by acp5762