Bob the Nailer be careful .....it could be your Mother, Daughter, Sister or Wife dealing with the same issues. ..
I don't understand your reply but much love to you either way
and thank you again to my Community forall the supportive messages,
I got great news today, I received email from a patient social security advocate that is going to take my case and on Friday we are going to begin the process, she says she will see me through, will do the paperwork, talk to any necessary people, she will fight to get signatures and answers until I get approved..
Thank You to whom ever contacted this person, I am truly grateful, I knew that posting this that someone in this community could help..
that's always been the truth about this community,
I have some of the best people in my life still to this day, that I met through my profession as an escort, I have received more respect, love and help Than I would have received from my own family,
even if I'm not practicing as an escort, that part of me still lives in side of me,...
I love you all. ..
MAKE SURE YOU DO YOUR RESEARCH before looking like a complete ASS for questioning the validity of whats happening. It is VERY VERY serious and I think I should explain for those that cant view my facebook
The writer had qouted me as retiring 18 months ago and ITS TRUE, I HAD BEGIN TO RETHINK MY future, I had attempted RETIRING , the poor guy had 600 words or less and he couldnt get into every single detail , BUT there was a very pertininent moment that happened 18 months ago that would forever change my life
18 months ago I WAS employed by a law firm, I was given my 13 year old daughter FULL TIME, I had reunited with my boyfriend from high school AND LIFE WAS GOOD
I WAS NOT HELD BACK BY ANYTHING EXCEPT MY CONSCIENCE TO WORK AS A PROVIDER, SO ADMITTEDLY, SOMETIMES I DID...
my best friends and roomate were all hobbyists
I had experienced the best years of my life as a provider...... until the end where I was VERY VERY UNHAPPY AND VERY LONELY, I had alot of VERY BAD THINGS HAPPEN as some of you know, my professional life was full of drama and headache and my personal life was full of loss and grief,
Last year I THOUGHT I had found my happiness...
Last July, I had just moved into a new place, I was unpacking my home, I got a sharp pain in my back, my left leg and I collapsed, I noticed I couldn't feel my leg and my left hip...It felt...dead weight...completely paralyzed..
Thank God my roommate was there, the ambulance was called and I was taken to Baylor, I had already been visiting the Emergency Room every month aroung "my time of the month" I was having severe pain in my lower extremities, they sent me home after a few hours I gained some mobility and I was referred to a specialist...
At first the doctors thought it was due to endometriosis, years ago I was told to have a hysterectomy but I DIDNT because I never wanted to stop working, I just couldnt
My uterus and ovaries are so deteriorated that they had begun to fuse to my internal organs, they could not find one of my ovaries so they assumed it may be in or near my spine...
Sonograms were done and I was diagnosed with the ADVANCE STAGES OF OVARIAN AND UTERINE CANCER
I was devastated, I was unable to walk very well, I moved slow, I ended up losing my job at the law firm, losing my benefits
My daughter had to go back to living with my parents because it was hard for me to any daily chores like cleaning, cooking, driving,
It was the summer and I no longer could do all the fun things with my daughter that we used to
I was unemployed and sinking fast financially
And I lost my boyfriend, his mother had just passed away the previous year from cancer and he didnt want to go through anything again
I was alone again and feeling so helpless..
There were times I posted ads, wanting to work, but then I was embarrassed about the way I looked, my lack of physical mobility had caused me more weight gain, I didnt feel sexy , but I knew i needed money..
There may have been one or two people I saw,but it wasn't the same..
I WASN'T THE SAME
I wasn't this SEXUAL DYNAMO, I was someone VERY DEPRESSED, very sick and I was angry that I felt I HAD TO DO IT
SO I didn't work as a provider, and I couldn't work, but was it permanent?
I sank into a deep depression, I can remember days, weeks, months of sitting in my home, never leaving my house, or stepping beyond the front porch or back yard
SO I had lost my medical benefits/ insurance...I applied to the public Healthcare System known as Parkland, for the next few months, I would spend all my time, trying to survive, waiting on results of test that were scheduled MONTHS APART
I was volunteering at City Square Food Pantry for 30 lbs of food a week, I was volunteering at City Square Thrift Store, I was having meals at a church on Columbia , they served lunch and dinner, I was doing everything I could to just survive day by day..
AND I WAS NO LONGER A PROVIDER
I did finally apply for assistance with the Department of Human Services and was given FULL MEDICAID AND food stamps through last month
I was going through MRIs, CT scans, XRAYS, bloodwork,
2 months ago I was finally diagnosed with LYMPHOMA
The CT SCANS revealed LYMPHOMAS in several areas of my body, including my
*right leg/thigh
*my left side under my arm
*my right breast plate
*my upper abdomen has a mass so large it is separating my abdominal wall and pushing my intestines forward AND I HAVE A HERNIA
*my my lower abdomen has several masses so large that I have HERNIAS ON THE LEFT AND RIGHT SIDE OF MY GROIN
* my neck and thyroid - my thyroid levels have been abnormal and thats why I have been losing my hair and nails (nails will completely fall off without pain), I HAVE EXTREME ALLERGIES and trouble regulating my body temperature.
I have a fatty liver and high cholesterol so I was put on a restricted diet ,
I had been experiencing NAUSEA for weeks at a time, I would eat and then throw up hours later
AND my food was still in an undigested form
No fat
No fried foods
No gluten
No dairy
No bread, rice,pasta except quinoa and brown rice
No hormones meat
ALL ORGANIC
nothing with any seeds or peels or anything acidic
I cant drink alcohol because it makes me itch violently after BUT I still DO NOW AND THEN ( can ya blame me?)
I was THEN DIAGNOSED IN A LETTER that I have posted on my facebook, with
SPINAL EPIDURAL LIPOMATOSIS
A rare and progressive disease that is THE REAL REASON i havent been able to walk , it has taken away my mobility, independence and some days
I experience PARAPERESIS,
I use a cane, a wheelchair, a leg immobilizer,
I have good days and bad days, some days i need help walking, bathing,EVEN WIPING MY OWN SELF IS A FUCKING CHORE
I cant get up from a chair or sit down without PAIN
I am stiff,heavy in my lower extremities,.
I cant walk for long distances ()( not even a simple grocery store trip) nor stand for long periods of time
Sometimes I will feel as if I am moving or attempting to move my toes, feet, legs and sometimes hands and THEY DONT RESPOND
It happens sporadically and spastically
This condition has little known treatment and CAN LEAD TO complete paralyzation, myeopathy, weakening and deteriotion of muscle , NEUROLOGICAL symptoms and even DEATH..
I have lost so much financially, I have sold, pawned , gone without, i lost my vehicle due to a title loan, I have HAD TO MOVE 3 TIMES in 4 MONTHS due to being evicted..
Sometimes MY UTILITIES ARE OFF, SOMETIMES I dont have FOOD ( I dont get much in food stamps),
So please SPARE ME the courtesy of your sarcastic responses and lack of sensitivity..
I didnt come here to be ridiculed.
This can happen to anyone
I came here for your help and support
Im scared..I feel alone and its hard for me to have posted this publicly BUT THERE REALLY AND TRULY IS NO FUTURE FOR ME AS A PROVIDER
I surely hope that doesnt make me any less worthy or valuable to consider me as a friend or offer your support
But dont be cruel
Life has already been very very hard for me
This article was written because IM having problems both financially and with the healthcare system, it was an attempt to get the help I needed, and sure enough a disability advocate has contacted me, I have my first appointment on Friday
I had let my pride stop me from applying sooner
I THOUGHT, Gee ...Maybe I should go back to being a provider
But I cant, even if I wanted to, ITS JUST too risky physically and I would be ashamed of not being the WONDERFUL VIBRANT Off the Chart woman I used to be
I cant live up to her anymore
Not to mention, SEX and pleasing others is the last thing on my mind..
I need to take care of me, I need help and I need to accept my limitations and delegate whats important...
DO YOU understand now?