What excuses do you married men to get out of the house?

Iaintliein's Avatar
Getting out of the house isn't the problem, easily explained with work related excuses. The problems are:
1. Getting time at home alone with the computer to work on photos I've taken of providers.
2. Getting out of the house with the necessary envelope stuffing, since she is now unemployed every penny is watched. And thanks to direct deposit I can no longer skim from the payroll or expense account checks.

Till better days!

Regards,
aRandyOne's Avatar
Sporting clays range is an analog for golf.
Hunting trips and "going out to prep the deer lease" lasted all last year for me. I filled an imaginary deer corn feeder several times. It explains the disappearance of the $$ in the joint checking account. Damn, that corn gets expensive! I never did fill my deer tags last year.
wild28's Avatar
I average about 80 hours a week so its not real hard to do. She is pretty much used to me never being home except on Sunday's.
Boltfan's Avatar
"Honey, I am going to fuck Jamie, be back in a few hours. I'll let you know if she is worth a threesome!"
my wife doesn't care, as long as she doesn't hear about it.
I have kids and would rather hang out with them at night and on the weekends anyway.

Occasionally I will sneak out early on sunday mornings to go to work, but 6am on sunday morning is a bit difficult to find anyone awake.
I have clients tell me all sorts of things they've used as excuses...inventive little buggers! LOL. Since most of the men I see have traveled here for work, they're already out of the house, so to speak. But most times, wifey expects that being on a business trip makes her man more available to chat on the phone etc....but NOT when he's with me! If we're not in the middle of something, one particular guy answers the phone to avoid suspicion. I've heard him saying anything from "Hon, I'm in the gift shop picking up some things to bring back that you & the kids will love. I'll call you back when I'm back in my room" to "I have a client coming to the hotel bar for a quick meeting...so let me go & I'll call as soon as I get this guy outta here". Little does mama know, he's in the bar with me, and we're whispering about how I'm going to cradle his dick in my tits later. HA!
pyramider's Avatar
"Honey, I am going to fuck Jamie, be back in a few hours. I'll let you know if she is worth a threesome!" Originally Posted by Boltfan

Be sure to let us know how that one turns out.
White Tiger's Avatar
From experience, I can offer that the golf excuse is a good one because it takes half a day to play a round, but if you come home and you're NOT sweaty--that will get questions. EAsy to get out in the afternoon, when I'm supposed to be at work anyway, as long as I have my job covered, but harder at night. I rarely get to go hobbying in the evening unless I use the timeless "dinner with client" excuse. Iaintliein--also speaking from experience, I would be careful about doing any hobbying on the home computer; she's probably smarter with those things than you think, or has friends that are, or waits for you to leave something undeleted in History. I learned the hard way NEVER hobby on the home computer, no matter how inconvenient the situation becomes.
daddylonglegs's Avatar
I use that I play basketball or try to schedule while she is at work. I guess its a natural thing!
mtabsw's Avatar
my wife doesn't care, as long as she doesn't hear about it.
I have kids and would rather hang out with them at night and on the weekends anyway.

Occasionally I will sneak out early on sunday mornings to go to work, but 6am on sunday morning is a bit difficult to find anyone awake. Originally Posted by monkmonk
+1
After outing myself to the SO, things are far less stressful. In general though I don't take time away from when we'd be together. I travel almost 100% which most weeks means seeing someone on the way to or from D/FW. Makes me VERY cancel intolerant.

Before outing, I'd sometimes also have a fake business trip "out & in" during one day. Especially useful if I was seeing Fleur (outcall only)
69er's Avatar
  • 69er
  • 07-09-2010, 05:36 PM
Sporting clays range is an analog for golf.
Hunting trips and "going out to prep the deer lease" lasted all last year for me. I filled an imaginary deer corn feeder several times. It explains the disappearance of the $$ in the joint checking account. Damn, that corn gets expensive! I never did fill my deer tags last year. Originally Posted by aRandyOne
But you did bag a couple does!

My wife and I tried swinging for a while. We both enjoyed it, but on several occasions, I got the cold shoulder for a while afterward. She confided that she really enjoyed the change of scenery playing with other men, but found she got jealous when she saw the other woman. So, I have her blessing to go play!

She just doesn't want to hear about it. I usually just say that I'll be out... and she doesn't ask any questions. Works for us!
quote=sinkerswim: "I like the idea about the massages. I do buy her massages from time to time. maybe it's my turn...."

Darlin', I even offer receipts for you to turn in to your insurance company for reimbursement if you have a benefit for it!

Just let me know when! I'd be happy to see your wife too!
Never tempt fate.

My wife and I just bought a set of golf clubs for her today. She said she wanted to see what she was missing since I seemed to enjoy hitting the range so often.

Guess she's gonna wonder why i suck so bad at golf.
I had a guy who was on vacation in New Orleans...he gave his wife a bunch of money to go shopping & he came to see me!!{he told her he was going to play golf....well he did get a hole in one...lol} Originally Posted by DallasRain
Actually, he got one in the hole...
Charlie Brown's Avatar
Me: "Look, I've run across this special add where this girl is going to do all the things I want you to do but you never will and I think I can get it done for about $250 or so.......any problems with that?.....also, what can I bring you from the grocery store?"

Her: " Yeah, right.....pick up some milk "

It does work. I feel so honest.