Submissive or submissive leaning men...

Rooter's Avatar
I'm having trouble understanding, and appreciating, the difference. While I agree kink and dominance are not necessarily interchangeable terms, I'm specifically referring to sex and asking about people who play with kinky or dominant women. Women business owners is not the topic at hand. Can you elaborate? What is a "bitch" to you? Please do tell... Originally Posted by ZoeyBelle
I dont usually think of women in those terms myself. I have played with a couple of dominant providers, usually because another wasn't available. Lol. One in particular was a lot if fun and the only woman that actually made anal fun for me. Me giving to her by the way. It's not something I ever seek out but she kept insisting and demanding. She made it fun. She wanted to role play and lots of other stuff. It wasn't anything that made me turned off or anything. To me what made her fun was she was down for anything and not afraid to talk about it. Several dominant women I have been with are a bit of a turn off. If their control aspect means saying no to what I want. Everyone is a individual.
I do understand power exchange and people wanting what they don't have and power relating to sex. But the psychology of a dom is usually a bit off putting and not for me. We are on fetlife site and male doms are usually the worst.
Rooter's Avatar
Submissive Men? Sounds what women today expect their partners to be, A Total pussy Originally Posted by BLM69
I always chuckle when I hear this. I never understood the pussy insult. Even as a child before I ever touched one I remember thinking "a pussy must be the most wonderful thing in the world, why is that a insult "? However I wasn't thinking about being one I guess. Lol
I have always been ultrasubmissive to girls and then women. I loved when my friends put makeup on me and undressed me in front of others and jacked me off at their whim. My girlfriends transitioned me to blowing guys. I became the pee toilet to any female who would sit on my face or stand over me and pee in my mouth or all over my face. I was a pee toilet to all three of my wives who peed in my mouth on demand. I was ordered to go down on women I lived with when the impulse hit them. I crave being ordered to have any woman sit on my face and make me swallow all their pee anytime anywhere. In public is a big turn on.
While I am not into pain, I do like to be slapped around and degraded by dominant women and have my large nipples pinched!
I want to be made to be a dominant woman’s slut bitch particularly in front of her friends! Originally Posted by whitechocolate
No one believes your fantasy stories. Write a letter to Penthouse Forum, will you?
We all have our kinks and what we like. Cim and cof is just super hot. I too always look for providers who allow this. I dont look for dominant providers fir this, I just look for women who are as slutty and kinky as I am Originally Posted by Rooter
Yep, that's where I start, with the slutty & kinky. Sometimes I just want to add aggressive & dominant to it. As I said, I really like the attitude, look (leather, boots, bustier), and dirty talk.
I dont usually think of women in those terms myself. I have played with a couple of dominant providers, usually because another wasn't available. Lol. One in particular was a lot if fun and the only woman that actually made anal fun for me. Me giving to her by the way. It's not something I ever seek out but she kept insisting and demanding. She made it fun. She wanted to role play and lots of other stuff. It wasn't anything that made me turned off or anything. To me what made her fun was she was down for anything and not afraid to talk about it. Originally Posted by Rooter
This is what I'm looking for. A fun, role playing Domme, or dominant personality.


Several dominant women I have been with are a bit of a turn off. If their control aspect means saying no to what I want. Everyone is a individual.
I do understand power exchange and people wanting what they don't have and power relating to sex. But the psychology of a dom is usually a bit off putting and not for me. We are on fetlife site and male doms are usually the worst. Originally Posted by Rooter
I've been with a Pro Domme once and you're right, it wasn't about what I wanted. I was actually bored. Found out I wasn't that type, but also found out I like nipple torture. That was a positive. And Fetlife hasn't been a source for me either. There was a site called Alt.com that I used when I first started down this road. It was more of a swinger site. Met a few that were fun. I think it was a sister site to AFF. It's still around, but I don't remember my ID or anything, so I'm not sure what it's like now.
Lhornbk's Avatar
It's partly the role reversal for me, and partly just something about me prefers to be dominated. I'm not into water sports, but I love being ordered to wear panties and stockings or pantyhose and having a domme put me across her lap and spank me, or sit on my face or otherwise order me to eat her pussy or rim her (oral sex is just about my favorite activity, I could do it for hours.) I have always wanted to find a mistress who would make me wear different female outfits, although just in the bedroom for her, or possibly some of her girlfriends. I have been pegged a couple of times too, and fantasize about having that happen again, or having a mistress force me to suck on her strapon. (Or be pegged by one woman while sucking on another woman's strapon.) I just love the idea of being used for a woman's pleasure, it is a huge turn-on for me.
ZoeyBelle's Avatar
You sound like a wonderful time. My BFF and I love spit roasting men like you and forcing you to wear our frilly panties.


It's partly the role reversal for me, and partly just something about me prefers to be dominated. I'm not into water sports, but I love being ordered to wear panties and stockings or pantyhose and having a domme put me across her lap and spank me, or sit on my face or otherwise order me to eat her pussy or rim her (oral sex is just about my favorite activity, I could do it for hours.) I have always wanted to find a mistress who would make me wear different female outfits, although just in the bedroom for her, or possibly some of her girlfriends. I have been pegged a couple of times too, and fantasize about having that happen again, or having a mistress force me to suck on her strapon. (Or be pegged by one woman while sucking on another woman's strapon.) I just love the idea of being used for a woman's pleasure, it is a huge turn-on for me. Originally Posted by Lhornbk
jonboy52's Avatar
This is what I'm looking for. A fun, role playing Domme, or dominant personality.


I've been with a Pro Domme once and you're right, it wasn't about what I wanted. I was actually bored. Found out I wasn't that type, but also found out I like nipple torture. That was a positive. And Fetlife hasn't been a source for me either. There was a site called Alt.com that I used when I first started down this road. It was more of a swinger site. Met a few that were fun. I think it was a sister site to AFF. It's still around, but I don't remember my ID or anything, so I'm not sure what it's like now. Originally Posted by papadee
Sounds like you met a self proclaimed pro domme and not an actual real life pro domme who was actually mentored by another pro domme. Any pro dommes I have ever met want a to know my likes, dislikes and hard limits to make sure if they're a match and the appt is 👍. Most even offer consultation prior to appt. I actually prefer the appts I've had with pro dommes more than any other appts.
Sounds like you met a self proclaimed pro domme and not an actual real life pro domme who was actually mentored by another pro domme. Any pro dommes I have ever met want a to know my likes, dislikes and hard limits to make sure if they're a match and the appt is 👍. Most even offer consultation prior to appt. I actually prefer the appts I've had with pro dommes more than any other appts. Originally Posted by jonboy52
No, she was a Pro, it was probably me who went in with expectations that she wasn't going to fulfill. I don't blame her, I just found out that I'm not a true sub or into BDSM. I love the roleplaying & the look, but I want to have sex.
Rooter's Avatar
Sounds like you met a self proclaimed pro domme and not an actual real life pro domme who was actually mentored by another pro domme. Any pro dommes I have ever met want a to know my likes, dislikes and hard limits to make sure if they're a match and the appt is 👍. Most even offer consultation prior to appt. I actually prefer the appts I've had with pro dommes more than any other appts. Originally Posted by jonboy52
Now I'm no expert here as I don't seek out dom providers or a dom mistress. If you are talking about a provider that is a pro dom that's one thing. Almost all providers want you to be pleased even if that means not taking what you want into consideration, if that's your kink. Some dom mistresses who say they are pro, in the lifestyle, don't care what you want and actually might be aroused if you are uncomfortable. Lol.
Of course dom is a general term and can range from gentle to forceful. Most seem to be hung up on power compensating for lack of, or taking control of.
CoffeeBear's Avatar
I was into kink and bondage when I went to college, back when AOL chat rooms were the rage. Found my college GF there, who was Dominant and quite the sadist, and that’s when I got introduced into a lot of the kinks and fetishes I love today: bondage, humiliation/verbal abuse, sensory deprivation, sissy/slut play, feminization, “forced” bi with other AOL members, pegging, queening, golden showers, cuckolding, and more.

While she was great in the bedroom, she wasn’t the most stable woman outside of it, despite my attempts to help. This lack of stability ultimately crept into the bedroom and she ended up violating my trust, which was the end of the relationship.

If I’m being honest, 75% is that I enjoy the play, especially since I’m in charge elsewhere in my life and I married a vanilla (soon to be ex) wife. 25% is probably just me chasing the past and trying to get an experience so incredible that it eclipses what I encountered before and I can finally leave my past in the past for good.

On a related note, when I do start dating again in the near future, I’m not going vanilla ever again. There’s got to be a stable, sane, ambitious woman out there that’s into kink and fetish play and likes to be in control in the bedroom on occasion, right? Or are women like this unicorns too?
Ohhh what fun I could have Originally Posted by GypsyHeart
Great reviews... Will have to meet next time i am in Tulsa
Hmmm I am attracted to the power exchange, the amazing sensations and role play. I don't consider myself a 'submissive guy' IRL. I have to be dom and aggressive and love giving up control to a sexy woman.
ZoeyBelle's Avatar
You sound fun. And yes, there are plenty of stable people into this lifestyle. But why do you feel like you need to leave it in the past? Why not ask for what you want? I think you can have your cake and eat it too...

I was into kink and bondage when I went to college, back when AOL chat rooms were the rage. Found my college GF there, who was Dominant and quite the sadist, and that’s when I got introduced into a lot of the kinks and fetishes I love today: bondage, humiliation/verbal abuse, sensory deprivation, sissy/slut play, feminization, “forced” bi with other AOL members, pegging, queening, golden showers, cuckolding, and more.

While she was great in the bedroom, she wasn’t the most stable woman outside of it, despite my attempts to help. This lack of stability ultimately crept into the bedroom and she ended up violating my trust, which was the end of the relationship.

If I’m being honest, 75% is that I enjoy the play, especially since I’m in charge elsewhere in my life and I married a vanilla (soon to be ex) wife. 25% is probably just me chasing the past and trying to get an experience so incredible that it eclipses what I encountered before and I can finally leave my past in the past for good.

On a related note, when I do start dating again in the near future, I’m not going vanilla ever again. There’s got to be a stable, sane, ambitious woman out there that’s into kink and fetish play and likes to be in control in the bedroom on occasion, right? Or are women like this unicorns too? Originally Posted by CoffeeBear
CoffeeBear's Avatar
You sound fun. And yes, there are plenty of stable people into this lifestyle. But why do you feel like you need to leave it in the past? Why not ask for what you want? I think you can have your cake and eat it too... Originally Posted by ZoeyBelle
Thanks for the compliment. 🙂

And maybe I worded it wrong—I’m wanting a similar experience in my next relationship, if that’s out there. I think because I’m in a bad relationship now, and some of the best sex I ever had was in that past D/s relationship, I keep trying to recreate the past with providers…when I should be looking forward.

As for meeting Dominant women in the dating world, I’m at a loss for where to begin. Then again, I haven’t been actively dating for some time, so I have a lot of homework to do…