What to say/do about the smelly vajayjay?

Don't Be Daft!'s Avatar
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Don't Be Daft!'s Avatar
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Don't Be Daft!'s Avatar
Yea...okay mate (snicker), you try doing that in real life. I think the direct approach is less insulting. Look luv your puss smells like my cat's shit box. Please wash, then stick Potpourri in fuck hole.

Not many threads make me laugh--but this one is fucking aces. Banter about stank hooker pussy bahahaha! Too bloody funny!
PS-You are a hooker it's your job to know if your cunt is broke. If it's broke the £ runs out. Economics 101.







In all seriousness, if she's mature and professional, why not just tell her? "I really do enjoy daty, and the first time we were together it was great. However, the last time it didn't seem as if you were as fresh as you could have been which stopped me from going down."

I suppose that is if you're giving her the benefit of the doubt that she isn't aware of the issue and just ignoring it. Originally Posted by FunInDFW
FunInDFW's Avatar
Yea...okay mate (snicker), you try doing that in real life. I think the direct approach is less insulting. Look luv your puss smells like my cat's shit box. Please wash, then stick Potpourri in fuck hole.

PS-You are a hooker it's your job to know if your cunt is broke. If it's broke the £ runs out. Economics 101. Originally Posted by Don't Be Daft!
:lol! Surely that English charm can make the worst news sound positive! And that last bit is a quote for the ages.
TinMan's Avatar
PS-You are a hooker it's your job to know if your cunt is broke. Originally Posted by Don't Be Daft!
That right there is the line of the week.
Don't Be Daft!'s Avatar
I must admit at times I make myself laugh.
Great thread. I have had this experience more than once. Trust me I know it goes both ways... You would think that since we are dealing with professionals and this is a business arrangement, that at the very least fresh breathe, freshly showered and fresh pussy would not be too much to ask??
Go take a dump and come back with smelly ass then recommend you both go clean up together, if she declines you will be fine as we all know our own shit doesn't stink.
If her pussy smells then I conclude that she doesn't care about her personal hygiene (which is repulsive), she's on her period and didn't tell you (which is rude and self-serving) or she's got "something" going on down there requiring mdedical treatment (which is scary). I pick up the fee, get dressed and leave. She's off my list and I'll gladly explain why I don't see her to any Hobbyist wishing to ask.
suiram77's Avatar
-- first time this has ever happened to me in the hobby.

I saw a certain provider and we had a great time. She's a fantastic girl. On our first meeting her coochie was, well, just a bit sweaty. Not horrible. Normal really if you consider someone who might have been working around the house a bit and was just a tiny bit sweaty and didn't get to take a shower right away. If it was an SO I wouldn't mind at all and DATY would have been a blast. In this case I just dove right in because of the above and because she was so damn hot.

The next time I saw her it was worse. Much worse. No way was I going to be sticking my face down there. WTF? How would you suggest that be handled for future meetings because other than that she's a great provider?

FWIW, I'm OCD about showering, cleaning up before showing up for a session. I can't stand the thought of not smelling like I just got out of the shower before being with a provider or even an SO.

Your thoughts? Originally Posted by Richardson570
Wow man that is horrible, but in the future this is what you do
I always run my finger in it and then put it up to her mouth to suck it
And if she turn her head and don't lick your finger then you don't lick her
Pussy simple as that. My rule is if she want taste her self then why would I.
DarthDVader's Avatar
I have had this happen a few times. Very disconcerting to run into a sticky sweaty VJ. One that really bugs me is going in for DATY only to find out it tastes/smells like cigs or weed. Yes ladies, it is possible for you to taste like your favorite brand of cigs or grass. Before a date I suggest you do what one of the ladies did right before we started to play. She shoved 2 fingers inside her, put them to her nose and said "Just giving it the old sniff test. It's OK." LOL true story.
  • zebra
  • 06-24-2014, 11:37 PM
God Damn go wash that fucking thing Bitch! Cant you smell dat rank ooose stinch between deem legs. I should'a said dat to Diane of Dallas cause her's smelled just like
seafood dat went bad.
Finger her, then rub it under her nose.. and ask her "Does this smell right to you?" She will get the hint.

Or ask her where her expiration date is printed... because something has curdled and needs to be tossed out. Originally Posted by TexasDave555
that's epic reply..I dropped from the chair laughing my a** out..