Naughty Photo

Still recovering from that last one BD, but here's one along the same lines...

A man was at a bar one night, not really looking for a hook-up but certainly willing if something became available. It was almost time for last call and a fairly attractive lady who appeared to be in her early 40's approached him. He invited her to join him and they shared a couple drinks, then last call was given.

Well, apparently they hit it off well and the lady asked if he'd like to go home with her. He agreed, and on the way there, the lady asked if he'd be interested in a little mother-daughter action. Well he thought he hit the jackpot. He started thinking in his head what the approximate age of the daughter would be, he figured she'd be in her 20's. He told her that it sounded like fun, something he'd never done before but certainly looked forward to a fun threesome.

They arrived at her house, he got comfortable on the couch, and she said she'd go get her. She walked over to the staircase and yelled upstairs, "Mom, can you come on down?"

It is a slow night in the tavern and despite her best efforts, the local working girl has not been able to make anything happen. She is just about to give it up when a strapping man of about 30 comes in the door and orders a beer. He is good looking and she decides that somehow she is going to make it work with him.

After some flirting and teasing, she makes it clear that while she would love to spend some time with him, she was "on the clock" so to speak.

"Well..." head said, "I have never paid a lady before, but there is a first time for everything I guess. Sorry if this is rude- but how much do you want and what do I get?"

The question is a little direct but she does not miss a beat. "It is your lucky day cowboy. It is pretty slow in here and I like you a lot. So I will tell you what, you will get a lucky day special. For $150 I will do whatever you want."

He looks her up and down and leans back in his chair. "Now that may be the best offer I have ever had." He takes out his wallet and counts out $150, looks deeply into her eyes and says "Whatever I want huh? OK then... Paint my house."

LMAO!! Good ones yall!

This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionallism goes right out the window...
He tells her to take her pants, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs.
"Do you know what I am doing?" asks the doctor?
"Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies.
He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing her breasts and asks, "Do you know what I am doing now?", she replies, "Yes, checking for cancer."
Finally, he tells her to take off her panties, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and starts having sex with her. He says to her, "Do you know what I am doing now?"
She replies, "Yes, getting herpies - thats why I am here!"