One of my current favs has a husband, and is in an affair with another guy. Over time, as we have developed a deeper friendship, I've become a bit of a shoulder for her as the balancing act she is doing is quite taxing emotionally. Almost everyone of my inner circle of providers have told me of their personal relationships and all have an SO at a minimum, and most are truthful about it. I've learned about kids, homes, school pressures,and such from each of them, but only after having spent a couple of years visiting, and feeling comfortable, and I have and will never ask anything.. I've met a SO of one of them, and like others have said, as long as it is not a safety issue for me, I'm honored to a degree that these ladies have enough trust in me to feel like letting me know if anohter side of their lives.
I have come to believe that sometimes the ladies want to share personal info with someone they know won't judge them, or think less of them because they have rationalized the career choice with ongoing private life choices. They just sometimes need an outlet that does not judge them and understands this goofy little lifestyle we all are playing in.