Haggling/negotiating....

i dont haggle with providers, its a respect thing.
ANONONE's Avatar
i dont haggle with providers, its a respect thing. Originally Posted by citizen33
Hmmmm. . .

Would you show this same respect in all market situations?

If you drive down the road tomorrow and notice that the gas station you usually frequent is now charging $8.59 per gallon today would you respectfully drive up, respectfully pump your gas, and then respectfully hand over the money quietly with no comments or questions?

An extreme example, I know, but I use the hyperbolic metaphor for a point here.

Damn, I am supposed to be napping. . .
i dont haggle with providers, its a respect thing. Originally Posted by citizen33
You're a good man!
IMO (and you know I have one) this is a business yes but being what the business is and the discretion and no-no's that go along with it.... 1. Haggling is the discussion of money and cost for an item or service. 2. You're not supposed to discuss money or cost in this business for an item or service.
Cpalmson's Avatar
Your logic is somewhat flawed. As an airline frequent flyer, I still pay the same rate as other flyers. They just give me points/miles that can be redeemed later for one trip. But you should figure out how many times you have to fly before you've built up enough miles for a free trip. It's astounding.

Mastercuts (and other salons) used to offer a free cut for every so many cuts (either 10 or 20 if I remember). They gave you a little card that could be punched for every time you came in for a cut. Once it was filled, you got a free cut. (BTW, I always forgot the card so I was never able to redeem even one cut.)

Now, if you did something like that (visit me 10 times at the full price and get a freebie) I wouldn't have a problem.

As for your bartending experience, the owner can set the rates (just like providers set their rates). But I'm willing to bet your tips went down. The owner wanted to encourage loyalty, but by reducing the prices, he effectively reduced your tips if the customers tipped a percentage. And in my experience, bar customers tend to be loyal no matter what the price. They are drawn to a particular bar through a combination of atmosphere, friends, wait staff, and habits. They would feel very strange in a different place, and would come back pretty quick. Originally Posted by charlestudor2005
Charles, seeing the same provider 10 times to get one freebie? Might as well put a ring on her finger while your at it

I have no more of a problem with gents that haggle and barter than I do with the providers that offer "SPECIALS" in their ads that are not a reduction in price.
Originally Posted by ANONONE
Whaaaat? I've never heard of this. Where have you seen this? H
After reading the latest posts in this thread, it appears there is consensus on the following:
  1. It is NOT ok for hobbyists to haggle over the rate, and
  2. It IS ok for providers to vary their rate in any manner they want whether it is fair or not.
You can imagine my opinion...
After reading the latest posts in this thread, it appears there is consensus on the following:
  1. It is NOT ok for hobbyists to haggle over the rate, and
  2. It IS ok for providers to vary their rate in any manner they want whether it is fair or not.
You can imagine my opinion... Originally Posted by charlestudor2005
Awwee...you're such of a sweet guy...you should get a 'sweet guy' rate!
I have a question that I want to throw out. If a lady offers specials and you miss it, is it inapropriate to ask for that lower rate? Furthermore, do you think it is wrong for the guy ro make an offer and just see how it is received. Times are tough and many girls aren't doing well financially, therefore any offer may be accepted and in fact the lady may be grateful for an offer if her business is not doing well.
See below.

I have a question that I want to throw out. If a lady offers specials and you miss it, is it inapropriate to ask for that lower rate? I did that once. Lady took me up on it, but weather interfered. When we were able to get together, she suddenly raised her rates again. I felt like she went back on her word. I never saw her, and would never see her after that experience. Since she didn't NC/NS me, I didn't advertise it. If it happened again, I would. I always felt the board should have know of her duplicitousness. Furthermore, do you think it is wrong for the guy ro make an offer and just see how it is received. You gotta be careful with this. Maybe the gals can suggest a way to do this w/o seeming to be haggling. Times are tough and many girls aren't doing well financially, therefore any offer may be accepted and in fact the lady may be grateful for an offer if her business is not doing well. If they are doing so poorly, I suspect they will offer specials. If they don't they run the risk of not making their monthly expenses. Besides, I think it is in poor taste to try and take advantage of someone in financial straits. Let her make an offer or run a special, then take her up on it. In this vein, I think that there are, for the most part, fewer specials being run than 12 - 18 months ago. I have no data, just an impression. Originally Posted by oleguy
I have a question that I want to throw out. If a lady offers specials and you miss it, is it inapropriate to ask for that lower rate? Furthermore, do you think it is wrong for the guy ro make an offer and just see how it is received. Times are tough and many girls aren't doing well financially, therefore any offer may be accepted and in fact the lady may be grateful for an offer if her business is not doing well. Originally Posted by oleguy
I would not 'make an offer' no...that just isn't a good idea.

I don't mind, like I said, if a gentleman asks if I have a current special rate...this is how some tip me off that they are hard up, and i can proceed accordingly.
But like CT2005 says, ultimately it is always up to the provider!
  • Bliss
  • 05-27-2010, 09:12 PM
I have a question that I want to throw out. If a lady offers specials and you miss it, is it inapropriate to ask for that lower rate? Furthermore, do you think it is wrong for the guy ro make an offer and just see how it is received. Times are tough and many girls aren't doing well financially, therefore any offer may be accepted and in fact the lady may be grateful for an offer if her business is not doing well. Originally Posted by oleguy
Personally, I get annoyed when I offer a limited time special and for days and days after (sometimes weeks), after it expires they still ask for the rate. But, that's just me. The only time I make an exception is if a guy has contacted me during my special and we have tried hard to work out a time that suits us both and we can't. I wouldn't make an offer even though times are tough. If the girl is struggling for business that badly she will have posted a special to try to generate interest.
Cpalmson's Avatar
I have a question that I want to throw out. If a lady offers specials and you miss it, is it inapropriate to ask for that lower rate? Furthermore, do you think it is wrong for the guy ro make an offer and just see how it is received. Times are tough and many girls aren't doing well financially, therefore any offer may be accepted and in fact the lady may be grateful for an offer if her business is not doing well. Originally Posted by oleguy

Personally, I get annoyed when I offer a limited time special and for days and days after (sometimes weeks), after it expires they still ask for the rate. But, that's just me. The only time I make an exception is if a guy has contacted me during my special and we have tried hard to work out a time that suits us both and we can't. I wouldn't make an offer even though times are tough. If the girl is struggling for business that badly she will have posted a special to try to generate interest. Originally Posted by Bliss
As a client, I would casually ask for the special. It would be a no pressure request. As Wayne Gretzky said, "You miss 100% of the shots you DON'T take". The provider did offer a special. I see no harm in asking if it is still available. If you get it, great. If not, then honor the provider's regular rate.

As a provider, if you do offer special rates from time to time, you should expect to be asked about it. As a client, I may peruse dozens of potential providers. If one provider has fluctuating rates, it is hard to recall what the current rate is, so asking is not bad form. Remember, the provider has offered the "special". If a provider is going to be frustrated by this, then don't advertise a special; just set your rates on your page as you see fit and let whatever happens to occur.
ANONONE's Avatar
As a client, I would casually ask for the special. It would be a no pressure request. As Wayne Gretzky said, "You miss 100% of the shots you DON'T take". The provider did offer a special. I see no harm in asking if it is still available. If you get it, great. If not, then honor the provider's regular rate.

As a provider, if you do offer special rates from time to time, you should expect to be asked about it. As a client, I may peruse dozens of potential providers. If one provider has fluctuating rates, it is hard to recall what the current rate is, so asking is not bad form. Remember, the provider has offered the "special". If a provider is going to be frustrated by this, then don't advertise a special; just set your rates on your page as you see fit and let whatever happens to occur. Originally Posted by Cpalmson
Great post, CPALMSON!

atlcomedy's Avatar

As a provider, if you do offer special rates from time to time, you should expect to be asked about it. As a client, I may peruse dozens of potential providers. If one provider has fluctuating rates, it is hard to recall what the current rate is, so asking is not bad form. Remember, the provider has offered the "special". If a provider is going to be frustrated by this, then don't advertise a special; just set your rates on your page as you see fit and let whatever happens to occur. Originally Posted by Cpalmson
I think there is some merit to this.

I think it is also important to bear in mind that it is hard to know how he found her or what he read. Old ads or posts (which may still show up in search engines) never really go away. In fact some ad venues deliberately leave ads up or repost them to make it look like their site has a critcal mass. As I've suggested in other threads, it is not his responsibility to try to track down everything she has even written. He see ad. He likey. He call.

If you are concerned about this be very explicit in wording your special. Instead of "Holiday Special ends Monday" try "Special ends May 31 at the stroke of midnight"