Providers showing their face

planojim's Avatar
Daphne...and you have a LOVELY face to show nice lady!!
PJ

My answer to this question has always been
"If they see my face here, then that means they are here too, for their own reasons so I dont have to be ashamed" Originally Posted by Daphne-Hart
I'm with Melannie on this one! You go girl!

My friends and family also know what I do for a living. I am very open about it. Although I am careful to keep my personal identity and my escort identity separated so as to not open the door for stalking or drama, I am not shamed of this line of work. Just like professionals in other fields do not need to hide their identities, I do not need to hide mine. I am proud to be a sex worker and this industry is my dream career. I walked away from a potential career in engineering wherein I was being recruited by dozens of companies and the US military's nuclear engineering department to enter this line of work because it's truly what I wanted. A decade ago I decided it's what I would love to do with my life and five years ago, I took the plunge and this journey began. No regrets!


Shaming sex workers is disgusting, and shaming sex workers for refusing to hide our faces in shame is equally disgusting. This is not to knock any lady who chooses not to show her face out of concern for her own privacy, as some ladies are not in a position to feel as confident about their futures as I feel about mine. For me, five years in this industry has taught me an invaluable amount of skills that are recyclable into different segments of this industry. This is my career. Yes, someday I will retire from being an escort, but I will never be ashamed of this career and will most likely just re-enter a different segment of the sex industry. I could screen for other providers, start a website like ECCIE, make a film about my life in this industry, become a sex worker rights activist and/or lawyer, open a health clinic for sex workers, etc etc etc. My future is in no way shot because I am open about being a sex worker. I have written articles about sex work and a google search of my legal name also connects me strongly to the sex industry. I don't ever want to work for anyone again anyway. I'm an independent lady, a business owner, an entrepreneur, and a motivated self-starter who is extremely savvy about marketing. When I move on from this line of work, it will be onto something even better, not to wage slavery for some boss somewhere. I don't ever want to work for/with anyone who would discriminate against a former sex worker anyway. Better to know up front that they are whorephobic so I can avoid association with them. That's one major reason why I am very open about what I do in my personal life.


One major reason why I show my face is that I don't appreciate objectifying myself with images of a faceless body. I am a human being and I appreciate that having my face in my images reflects this. I like to make eye contact with the camera to remind potential clients that I am an engaging person and not just a body to play with. It's a very intentional decision and I wouldn't have it any other way. Originally Posted by spicyzoey
+10000!

I love your post.

However, the problem wherein is that much of (American) society does not see escorting, stripping, and even porn as actual work.

I'm speaking for the professionals; not the ones who use sex work as a means just to get by until they secure a "vanilla" job.

For those of us who put in the time and effort to run a successful escort business; prostitution is still illegal.

Stripping and porn you can get away with; but a dancer's license, sheriff's card, 1099, and a video can always come up later.

You can candy coat escorting all you want, but in reality, guys aren't exchanging roses for fucking conversation. We all know this, Society knows this, Cops know this, and Uncle Sam knows this too.

For that reason, and that reason alone, I am cautious of attaching my face to something that isn't absolutely legal, for fear of being prosecuted or watched later on down the line.

Lastly, for the providers who do show their faces, there are much more detrimental things that can happen on your behalf that can impede on you having a future career.

Bad credit, Arrests for dumb things, Lack of education, Gaps in employment and risqué posts on your real life Facebook profiles can all potentially hurt your future.
jimmylbob's Avatar
We don't need assholes to mansplain to us how the world works. Originally Posted by spicyzoey
This made smile... thanks for that!


I am simply enacting the changes that I wish to see in the world, starting with MYSELF. Originally Posted by spicyzoey
Regardless of the topic, this statement is profound... outlining personal behavior from which every one of us could benefit!!! Thank you, Zoey!
The problem with this world is people wanna treat people based on what they do or the things they do, not who they are. If hiding a face helps avoid the stigma that some people in this society wanna give others, then be all for it. Whether a provider shows her face or not is up to them and how much privacy they wanna covet, but it ultimately doesn't define who they are. Working with professional athletes and celebrities for a living, I can tell thousands of stories of how fake people are when others are watching. Judge someone by how they spend their moments with you and how they act towards you and treat you, and reciprocate the same. Life works much easier when you keep a positive mindset through all the negativities and bullshit this world will throw at you.
My answer to this question has always been
"If they see my face here, then that means they are here too, for their own reasons so I dont have to be ashamed" Originally Posted by Daphne-Hart
That is very true of people that are on here looking to p4p, but some employers or even a rumor and private information shared with the wrong person could lead "outsiders" here. All it takes is a few clicks.

Its not the people already in the hobby that i worry about. Its the persons who might stumble upon it someday who see this as dirty or disgusting and aim to do harm precisely bc they disagree with it.

I would agree with what you said if hobbyists and providers were the only people who could see the site though.

FYI...ThatHottNurse has a BEAUTIFUL face!! She's also a great lady and a cool chick!
PJ Originally Posted by planojim
Thank you, sir! Very sweet of you. The sentiment is mutual, of course!
In response to the original topic, I used to refuse to see providers with cropped or blurred-out faces due to bad experiences with bait & switch, most mongers have been down path, right? But, I've realized that it leaves more of a mystery when their faces aren't shown. But, since I'm a "face man" I try to book with ladies first who show their faces. I'm not prejudiced, but ladies, please do us mongers a favor and update your pics.
planojim's Avatar
You're VERY welcome LOVELY Nurse!!!

That is very true of people that are on here looking to p4p, but some employers or even a rumor and private information shared with the wrong person could lead "outsiders" here. All it takes is a few clicks.

Its not the people already in the hobby that i worry about. Its the persons who might stumble upon it someday who see this as dirty or disgusting and aim to do harm precisely bc they disagree with it.

I would agree with what you said if hobbyists and providers were the only people who could see the site though.



Thank you, sir! Very sweet of you. The sentiment is mutual, of course! Originally Posted by thathottnurse
melannie_star's Avatar
I wonder how many of us have actually clicked on one of the sites and have seen a family member advertising or vice versa.

How would you explain that one at the dinner table.

I have hooked a family member up with an escort before.. I would not do that again!
He went for the extended hours..without realizing it.
I ended up paying his tab Lesson learned.
Luke Skywalker's Avatar
My answer to this question has always been
"If they see my face here, then that means they are here too, for their own reasons so I dont have to be ashamed" Originally Posted by Daphne-Hart
Baby, if i didnt love you yet, i would fall in love with you right now. Alas, it has happen yet, so it is a moot point! lol.
My answer to this question has always been
"If they see my face here, then that means they are here too, for their own reasons so I dont have to be ashamed" Originally Posted by Daphne-Hart
I understand your logic, and it is true. But the person looking at your picture likely doesn't have his or her picture posted on this site, and can pretend to be holier than thou in a real world setting and be judgmental you.
  • EZ.
  • 11-29-2014, 08:03 PM
We don't need assholes to mansplain to us how the world works. You assume that we are too stupid to understand these things and that's actually very offensive. If you simply want to inform ladies who may be unaware of how hiring processes work, then please do state the facts. But DON'T assume that we don't understand how the world works and DON'T tell us what to do as though you are wiser than us. We are the ones running the businesses here and it's not really your place to decide that just because we are whores, we must not know what we are doing. That actually IS a shaming tactic and it's very rude. Express your opinion, but there's no reason to treat us as inferior or unaware just because we make a decision that you don't personally agree with.

I'm happy to limit my options in ways that preclude me from working with those who would stigmatize sex workers. My activism includes living my life openly and that's what I choose to do. It's my choice and I don't appreciate your assumption that it is borne out of ignorance. My decision isn't about the "hobby lifestyle" it's about a deep conviction that sex work is nothing to be ashamed of and that neither I nor other sex workers should have to hide what we do. I am simply enacting the changes that I wish to see in the world, starting with MYSELF. So there's really no need to be condescending and act like you know more about the world than I do just because you know a lady or two who regretted their decisions. Maybe you can focus on telling the hobbyists who demand face pics to stop doing that or spend your energy fighting for acceptance of sex workers in society rather than getting on a high horse and telling intelligent independent women that we need to hide our faces due to fear that others will discriminate against us in the future. I refuse to make my decisions that way and your assertion that I need to make decisions out of shame and fear about potential future discrimination is offensive, period. Originally Posted by spicyzoey
What is this the sex worker liberation movement? You are totally out of line directing this towards TinMan. I would seriously doubt that any of the women, that know him, on this thread, agree with your assessment of him.
  • EZ.
  • 11-29-2014, 08:13 PM
I understand your logic, and it is true. But the person looking at your picture likely doesn't have his or her picture posted on this site, and can pretend to be holier than thou in a real world setting and be judgmental you. Originally Posted by Golden Man
That would be the ultimate in hypocrisy. It is one thing to pretend to be holier than thou and another to believe it.

I can hear the married guys, "isn't that disgraceful" but thinking, "damn, I would hit that in a second". That is pretending being judgmental is believing.
Zoey Zacquery's Avatar
Um, of course this is the sex worker liberation movement. I'm a sex worker and I am always working toward the liberation of myself and other sex workers. I can see how we have fundamental disagreements if you have a problem with that though. I've said my piece.
BBW Katrina's Avatar
Honestly I don't think it's anyone's business if a provider chooses to show her face. Just as it isn't anyones business what she charges, where she advertises, whether she does incall or outcall, etc.,
We are all aware of the risk.
I don't know that I agree with this premise in the first place. Having been here for about 4 years nd on ASPD for nearly 10 before that, I don't think its really changed that much.

There have always been those that chose to show their face and those that didn't. Ultimately its their risk and their choice. I see this as similar to a lady choosing to bare more skin or stay covered up in some sexy lingerie. Her choice. She's got to decide what she's comfortable with.

I see more and more providers are showing their face in pics. May I ask, are not you afraid of one of your family members seeing you? Probably, if I was a female provider the only time I'd show my face in pics is if i"m out of the country and had no family where im provider services. Originally Posted by Shrewd