Hurt...

Chung Tran's Avatar
Scribe has been described as getting too much into the lady's business.. but I wonder if you can be too casual and matter-of-fact? I have had a few non-responders when I asked for a session, I was brief and to the point in my PM's.. I know some ladies want you to "introduce" yourself first, but there are others who hate the back-and-forth.. "don't PM until you are ready to book"!

too many panties get wadded up on ECCIE, Men's and Women's.. I prefer finding those who don't wear underwear.
Scribe's Avatar
Scribe has been described as getting too much into the lady's business.. but I wonder if you can be too casual and matter-of-fact? I have had a few non-responders when I asked for a session, I was brief and to the point in my PM's.. I know some ladies want you to "introduce" yourself first, but there are others who hate the back-and-forth.. "don't PM until you are ready to book"!

too many panties get wadded up on ECCIE, Men's and Women's.. I prefer finding those who don't wear underwear. Originally Posted by Chung Tran
CT is right. As a courtesy, I contact any provider I'm interested in with a brief PM. (INTRO & asking if they need screening). Even many that say they do need to screen, send a text back immediately asking to schedule.

Give notice, don't give notice... ask this, don't ask that... it gets confusing. But most people work it out and things get accomplished. Again, some of the things I would think would tick women off are nothing - and obviously some things I think wouldn't, do.

AllegraHope had a post about "seeing her in public"... you can read there, many of us agree on the limits. Still, even there, there are alternative views.

The underlying note is "nobody should want to offend" (and most of us dont)... but when it happens, other than apologize and learn - what can we do?
Grace Preston's Avatar
I feel your intentions were good, but your chosen phrasing could easily be taken the wrong way. I'd always suggest merely asking if she has time in her personal schedule beyond your planned appointment in the event that you'd like to stay longer. That leaves the window open for a yes or no, without perhaps phrasing in a way that may make someone think that you think "less of them" because of their profession.
Scribe's Avatar
I feel your intentions were good, but your chosen phrasing could easily be taken the wrong way. I'd always suggest merely asking if she has time in her personal schedule beyond your planned appointment in the event that you'd like to stay longer. That leaves the window open for a yes or no, without perhaps phrasing in a way that may make someone think that you think "less of them" because of their profession. Originally Posted by GracePreston
Noted, an appreciated Grace.
ElBombero's Avatar
You asked if she was "stacking," and she got pissed? I can't imagine why. But, regardless of your intentions, what's done is done. Apologize and move on down the road. I'm sure these ladies deal with a lot worse things than this, and to keep dwelling in it in public makes it seems like you care less about her feelings and more about your reputation.
micktoz's Avatar
Again - had she posted a two hour rate - it never would have come up. "Multi-hour discounts!" doesn't tell me anything. She might have thrown a number where my next response would have been "What's 3? What's 4?"

Scribe, if there isn't a published cost for more time, I usually ask "What would it take to arrange 90, 2 hours, 3 hours etc.?"

What I usually get back is the answer I'm looking for.
After receiving the answer, "Are you available for 2 hours?" is all that is necessary.
micktoz's Avatar
Micktoz, I appreciate respect... and I appreciate the fact that you saw, I was trying to be respectful. I'd like to point out, this was a first time meeting with a new provider (New to me).
I've read your reviews... And like me, you tend to see the same girls quite a bit. I can guarantee you, had any of the other women I see heard this... They would have understood that it was just a question... In my often satirical joking manner " are you free for the night? Or if I ask for more, will that screw other things you have planned?" mind you, I should have asked it more eloquently. but I don't feel that question, in and of itself is disrespectful.

this wasn't the extension of a session we're already IN... it was completely during the setup phase. and I'm in no way suggesting that she was out of line in any way...
again, I'm simply trying to gain perspective here.
But, I appreciate you sharing yet another viewpoint... Thanks Originally Posted by Scribe
I get what you were doing. It is quite a dance that we walk. As the saying goes, "familiarity breeds contempt". Of course I have been guilty of this also.

There is one other saying that I think applies, "Contempt prior to investigation". I have also been guilty of this and It sounds like the provider took it in this manner and she also exhibited the same behavior. There are always two sides.

BTW, you mentioned looking at my reviews. I only visit DFW a few times a year and I do repeat with some amazing women, a few that are UTR (no reviews). But, most of my reviews are on another site that starts with T, as that is the board more relevant to the cities I frequent.


Good luck have fun!!!
Scribe's Avatar
Micktoz... nothing but respect man... Thanks
Scribe's Avatar
You know theres a weird thing here that CT brought up let's say you're a girl and you work at a KFC... you really can't get so upset over the word breast or thigh that you can't do your job. Likewise, I've had providers tell me when booking a session that they were " selling an F". and while I understand respect and decorum... if a provider doesn't list the service, how do you ask for it without being graphic enough that you might say something that they would take offense to?

"Stacking- with this particular provider, was a poor choice of wording... however in my defense, I see many of the hobbyist calling them whores... Which is something I would never do

the only reason that I brought this up here is because it offended someone I thought was nice.... I still think she's nice, so much so - that in spite of my faux pas She still willing to see me...

all the more reason for this thread on Self Improvement
Scribe... you seems like a really sweet guy. Don't let anyone on here change that. It's good to see at least one good guy on here. Stay sweet baby. Hold your head up. Muah
Sir Lancehernot's Avatar
You know theres a weird thing here that CT brought up let's say you're a girl and you work at a KFC... you really can't get so upset over the word breast or thigh that you can't do your job. Likewise, I've had providers tell me when booking a session that they were " selling an F". and while I understand respect and decorum... if a provider doesn't list the service, how do you ask for it without being graphic enough that you might say something that they would take offense to?

"Stacking- with this particular provider, was a poor choice of wording... however in my defense, I see many of the hobbyist calling them whores... Which is something I would never do Originally Posted by Scribe
Like so many other things in the hobby, it depends.

There have been some women whom I've seen several or many times whom I'd never dream of calling up and saying, "Hey, how about a blowjob today?" or "Can I come by and fuck you this afternoon?" or something similar. They presented themselves to me, and our relationships developed, in such a way that it just would have seemed totally inappropriate. And I'd never use the word "slut" or "whore" to refer to them. These are the sort of women I preferred to see on a regular basis.

But there were others, based on the same criteria (presentation and relationship, ) with whom I would have had no such compunctions.
BLM69's Avatar
  • BLM69
  • 01-30-2017, 02:22 PM
Don't be a pussy OP or the site piranhas will eat you alive in here, this is not the RW or civi women you're dealing with here.
IMN2U's Avatar
  • IMN2U
  • 01-30-2017, 02:29 PM
It's impossible to spend enough time with any of the providers to truly know them well enough to avoid mis speaking at some point.
. Originally Posted by Iaintliein
This quote is so true. ^^^

Scribe, you seem like a decent guy. Just chalk it up to experience. You have had a lot of good experiences. A communication breakdown every once in a while isnt too awful.
micktoz's Avatar
Hahaha, this is almost a reverse threAD. Scribe, you have just got yourself in the good graces of the thoughtful providers here. No need to be a hard ass on this board. Well done, Mate! For all of us mongers who treat women like people, you are a pretty good example.
PeterBota's Avatar
Hahaha, this is almost a reverse threAD. Scribe, you have just got yourself in the good graces of the thoughtful providers here. No need to be a hard ass on this board. Well done, Mate! For all of us mongers who treat women like people, you are a pretty good example. Originally Posted by micktoz
He was haughty and demeaning to the fine young lady. And you say he treated her well? Shame on both of you.