Quote from OP { I'm not really that worried about the disease itself since it is so common and has no real health impacts, but I am freaking out about how it will impact my life. I still haven't told her '} Quote
Is she (wife) aware of the 1st exposure? , u knew this and still exposed others???
- Sweet N Little
- 12-29-2010, 04:59 PM
- London Rayne
- 12-29-2010, 05:16 PM
Ummm thank you and "he is not all that worried about it." Cheers to him and his wife he probably infected!
- London Rayne
- 12-29-2010, 05:19 PM
Charles we realize this is a risk, but so is screwing men for free. You don't have to be an escort to have multiple sex partners...hell you don't even have to be 18 lmao. I don't think anyone signs up for being lied to which is why alerts are posted when guys request bbfs. So no, it does not just come with a "provider's territory" but yours as well lmao. What if you saw someone he was with? Since you don't go for cbj, well nuff said.
As I said, I am not naive enough to assume I did not run into someone who had something, but I will be darned if omiting that crap should come with the territory. He deserves what he gets as far as I am concerned. If any of us were spreading this or something else around, I wonder what would be said lol. So it comes with the territory for ALL involved in the hobby, because odds are many providers are also lying about being clean. I hate to note the obvious chain of infection here, but he and others like him are putting all of us at risk...not just the ladies lol.
As I said, I am not naive enough to assume I did not run into someone who had something, but I will be darned if omiting that crap should come with the territory. He deserves what he gets as far as I am concerned. If any of us were spreading this or something else around, I wonder what would be said lol. So it comes with the territory for ALL involved in the hobby, because odds are many providers are also lying about being clean. I hate to note the obvious chain of infection here, but he and others like him are putting all of us at risk...not just the ladies lol.
- MsElena
- 12-29-2010, 05:56 PM
If a provider was outted as doing this, the hobbyists would want to hang her out to dry.
I do disagree with what you said Charles. Being in the hobby as a provider or hobbyist, its NOT part of the package. Anyone with a soul or even half a heart wouldn't continue to hobby if they had an STD of any type.
I do disagree with what you said Charles. Being in the hobby as a provider or hobbyist, its NOT part of the package. Anyone with a soul or even half a heart wouldn't continue to hobby if they had an STD of any type.
- FatBastard
- 12-29-2010, 06:36 PM
I have been keeping up with this thread and just cannot resist posting my two cents.
I had an ex gf who started providing in June of this year. I was paying all of her bills (supporting her, etc.). She told me she wanted to get a job and earn her own money. She started travelling out of town for one week a month to different locations throughout the US. Well, in September, I accidentally discovered what she was doing. I read her reviews on TER and read where she had a lot of unprotected encounters during the same time she was with me. I am a big boy. If that's what she wanted to do, then let me know. Do not disrespect me and put my health at risk. That is truly reprehensible. Now I am going through periodic testing and am clean so far, but the pain and stress has been hard to bear at times.
Asstronaut, I never read at any time where you are truly concerned about the safety and well being of your wife, who also happens to be the mother of your 3 children. You may not love her anymore, but she is the mother of your children and for that reason alone, she deserves better. I am not an expert on what all you might have, but I suspect she could have something hence there is a remote chance it could be passed on to your children. Maybe by sharing a glass of Kool Aid. I don't now. But from what I read, it is apparent to me that you are only concerned about your own but. I suggest you man up, grow a pair, get your life in order and stop putting others at risk.
I had an ex gf who started providing in June of this year. I was paying all of her bills (supporting her, etc.). She told me she wanted to get a job and earn her own money. She started travelling out of town for one week a month to different locations throughout the US. Well, in September, I accidentally discovered what she was doing. I read her reviews on TER and read where she had a lot of unprotected encounters during the same time she was with me. I am a big boy. If that's what she wanted to do, then let me know. Do not disrespect me and put my health at risk. That is truly reprehensible. Now I am going through periodic testing and am clean so far, but the pain and stress has been hard to bear at times.
Asstronaut, I never read at any time where you are truly concerned about the safety and well being of your wife, who also happens to be the mother of your 3 children. You may not love her anymore, but she is the mother of your children and for that reason alone, she deserves better. I am not an expert on what all you might have, but I suspect she could have something hence there is a remote chance it could be passed on to your children. Maybe by sharing a glass of Kool Aid. I don't now. But from what I read, it is apparent to me that you are only concerned about your own but. I suggest you man up, grow a pair, get your life in order and stop putting others at risk.
- Sweet N Little
- 12-29-2010, 06:51 PM
I have been keeping up with this thread and just cannot resist posting my two cents.+1
I had an ex gf who started providing in June of this year. I was paying all of her bills (supporting her, etc.). She told me she wanted to get a job and earn her own money. She started travelling out of town for one week a month to different locations throughout the US. Well, in September, I accidentally discovered what she was doing. I read her reviews on TER and read where she had a lot of unprotected encounters during the same time she was with me. I am a big boy. If that's what she wanted to do, then let me know. Do not disrespect me and put my health at risk. That is truly reprehensible. Now I am going through periodic testing and am clean so far, but the pain and stress has been hard to bear at times.
Asstronaut, I never read at any time where you are truly concerned about the safety and well being of your wife, who also happens to be the mother of your 3 children. You may not love her anymore, but she is the mother of your children and for that reason alone, she deserves better. I am not an expert on what all you might have, but I suspect she could have something hence there is a remote chance it could be passed on to your children. Maybe by sharing a glass of Kool Aid. I don't now. But from what I read, it is apparent to me that you are only concerned about your own but. I suggest you man up, grow a pair, get your life in order and stop putting others at risk. Originally Posted by FatBastard
if exposed 8yrs ago as u stated asswhatever and she has had a child during that time, unless it was csection the child was exposed as well unless you have been using protection with her (your wife) if thats the case then you did not endanger your wife or children hopefully. My bet is you have not used condoms with your wife, and by your own statement u said comdoms are always fool proof. But hey , its just a freckle.
- Guest011914-1
- 12-29-2010, 06:58 PM
Pay no attention to some of the rude comments that have been posted...some people are just rude and have nothing nice to say...read my PM
It bums me out that I've been bashed on a thread where I was asking for constructive suggestions. I have gotten some kind advice from providers via PM, and I want to thank them. As to why I would post this on this board, I figured that it must have happenned to someone else, and they might have some ideas about how to deal with disclosure. The comment from one person that I should just lie seems harsh, but considering 50% of the population has had this stuff at some time, may be the best there is...my thinking is that it may have been there dormant, or it may have been new, but I have to try to save my marriage. Obviously thhis is my fault, but for the record, I always wear condoms with providers. I don't see providers that often, and I obviously haven't seen any since I notice the symptoms, so I'm not going around spreading this stuff, and I'm not really that worried about the disease itself since it is so common and has no real health impacts, but I am freaking out about how it will impact my life. I still haven't told her, and the soonest i can get to a doctor is in two weeks, so i don't know what i'm going to do. Originally Posted by asstronaut
- asstronaut
- 12-30-2010, 11:55 AM
some of you are plain mean. others (including several health care professionals) have written me very kind and informative and helpful private messages.
first, thankfully, i have now been seen by two doctors who say i have no symptoms of any std, but there is not test for hpv in men, so i may or may not have it. he said considering the number of sex partners i've had, i probably had contracted at least one strain of the virus, but that i had no symptoms. the bumps i was freaking out about are not genital warts, but irritated hair follicles in my pubic area.
second, i said i was exposed 8 years ago, meaning after i had sex with a woman while wearing a condom, she called and told me that she had a positive pap smear for hpv, and that i had therefore been exposed, and that i needed to be checked. i went to a dermotologist and was checked, but (like i said above) there is no test for hpv in men, and i never developed any symptoms, and i never thought i had anything wrong with me. but i know i was exposed, since condoms don't protect from this virus. exposed to the disease is not the same as contracting the disease, and if the cdc's statistics are correct, I now believe that most of the people who read this board have also been exposed, irrespective of whehter they contracted it.
if i had thought i could transfer anything to anyone, i would have told my wife and abstained from the hobby.
third, i always wore a condom with providers, but apparently that isn't enough to protect against hpv or crabs. bbbj or cbj doesn't matter. condoms help, but since the disease is frequently transmitted from pubic area to pubic area, outside where a condom would cover, you can't rely on condoms. hpv and crabs are the two stds not transmittted by human fluids, and therefore the 2 stds that condoms can't prevent.
fourth, i think everyone should read the facts and statistics about hpv for themselves on the cdc website. http://www.cdc.gov/std/hpv/ i am not going to try to argue with all of you. i feel like i was trying to get some advice, and all i got was criticism. sorry if i hit a nerve.
fortunately, i have now been to two doctors, and have been cleared. but i will say that the stress and fear and depression i felt when i though i might have an std was something we should all consider.
read the cdc's website. hobby as safely as possible.
first, thankfully, i have now been seen by two doctors who say i have no symptoms of any std, but there is not test for hpv in men, so i may or may not have it. he said considering the number of sex partners i've had, i probably had contracted at least one strain of the virus, but that i had no symptoms. the bumps i was freaking out about are not genital warts, but irritated hair follicles in my pubic area.
second, i said i was exposed 8 years ago, meaning after i had sex with a woman while wearing a condom, she called and told me that she had a positive pap smear for hpv, and that i had therefore been exposed, and that i needed to be checked. i went to a dermotologist and was checked, but (like i said above) there is no test for hpv in men, and i never developed any symptoms, and i never thought i had anything wrong with me. but i know i was exposed, since condoms don't protect from this virus. exposed to the disease is not the same as contracting the disease, and if the cdc's statistics are correct, I now believe that most of the people who read this board have also been exposed, irrespective of whehter they contracted it.
if i had thought i could transfer anything to anyone, i would have told my wife and abstained from the hobby.
third, i always wore a condom with providers, but apparently that isn't enough to protect against hpv or crabs. bbbj or cbj doesn't matter. condoms help, but since the disease is frequently transmitted from pubic area to pubic area, outside where a condom would cover, you can't rely on condoms. hpv and crabs are the two stds not transmittted by human fluids, and therefore the 2 stds that condoms can't prevent.
fourth, i think everyone should read the facts and statistics about hpv for themselves on the cdc website. http://www.cdc.gov/std/hpv/ i am not going to try to argue with all of you. i feel like i was trying to get some advice, and all i got was criticism. sorry if i hit a nerve.
fortunately, i have now been to two doctors, and have been cleared. but i will say that the stress and fear and depression i felt when i though i might have an std was something we should all consider.
read the cdc's website. hobby as safely as possible.
- Naomi4u
- 12-30-2010, 12:15 PM
If a provider was outted as doing this, the hobbyists would want to hang her out to dry.Very well put MsElana!
I do disagree with what you said Charles. Being in the hobby as a provider or hobbyist, its NOT part of the package. Anyone with a soul or even half a heart wouldn't continue to hobby if they had an STD of any type. Originally Posted by MsElena
- Hugbuddy
- 12-30-2010, 12:19 PM
Kudos asstronaut, and glad to hear the good news from your recent Dr. visits, I'm sure that would have been good enough news to allow for a decent nights sleep for a change!
Yeppers on the "plain mean" comment! Anytime though that you sort of open yourself up and expose your private self on a public forum, there will always be someone(s) to knock yer legs out from under ya!! You handled it well!!
Good Luck
Yeppers on the "plain mean" comment! Anytime though that you sort of open yourself up and expose your private self on a public forum, there will always be someone(s) to knock yer legs out from under ya!! You handled it well!!
Good Luck
- FLWrite
- 12-30-2010, 03:43 PM
some of you are plain mean. others (including several health care professionals) have written me very kind and informative and helpful private messages.I'm sure glad to hear of your positive results from the doctor. As you suggested, the emotional distress surrounding STD's can often cause people to become part of the "worried well," eventually making themselves sick worrying about what sickness they might have.
... Originally Posted by asstronaut
The knowledge you've gained, coupled with the lack of compassion you've experienced here in some cases, hopefully will serve you in the future to help others on the forums. As you've seen, it's pretty easy for fear to rule around this topic.
I hope you'll forgive what might seem like rather uncivil treatment by some. It's easy for people's fear and passion--and often lack of information!--to curdle together into somewhat unmannerly posts. I don't think anyone meant to be indecent but I think everyone will understand why it appeared that way.
Glad you'll be able to enter the new year with a refreshed perspective.
All the best!
- Guest011914-1
- 12-30-2010, 06:06 PM
I love your positive but honest feedback...you always know how for diffuse things
I'm sure glad to hear of your positive results from the doctor. As you suggested, the emotional distress surrounding STD's can often cause people to become part of the "worried well," eventually making themselves sick worrying about what sickness they might have.
The knowledge you've gained, coupled with the lack of compassion you've experienced here in some cases, hopefully will serve you in the future to help others on the forums. As you've seen, it's pretty easy for fear to rule around this topic.
I hope you'll forgive what might seem like rather uncivil treatment by some. It's easy for people's fear and passion--and often lack of information!--to curdle together into somewhat unmannerly posts. I don't think anyone meant to be indecent but I think everyone will understand why it appeared that way.
Glad you'll be able to enter the new year with a refreshed perspective.
All the best! Originally Posted by FLWrite
- FLWrite
- 12-30-2010, 06:28 PM
- Guest011914-1
- 12-30-2010, 08:51 PM
WELL SAID
Kudos asstronaut, and glad to hear the good news from your recent Dr. visits, I'm sure that would have been good enough news to allow for a decent nights sleep for a change!
Yeppers on the "plain mean" comment! Anytime though that you sort of open yourself up and expose your private self on a public forum, there will always be someone(s) to knock yer legs out from under ya!! You handled it well!!
Good Luck Originally Posted by Hugbuddy
- London Rayne
- 12-30-2010, 10:28 PM
