To the ladies... would you consider going out with a client for real?

Or a bucket of fried chicken.

rules are for insects.

as a higher form of animal, the only question that matters is this: how much risk, uncertainty, and adventure are you willing to add to your life?

if you can't answer that question rationally, then you have the answer to your current dilemma.

I agree with Caroline but I have to be honest. I have been out with one of my regular client who I haven't seen in a month. He had concert tickets he did not want to waste, we hit the pool hall (I won all 3 games), had dinner (I paid), had some drinks & said our goodbyes. He goes back & forth from the east coast to the bay area. He just wanted to have a good time & enjoy himself that night. So I figured hey why not. I'd do it again but only with him.

So it depends. Hey doesn't hurt to try!!!

I just did a post entitled " moment of clarity " where I talked about how I had a provider who give me a sob story and asked to borrow money and after the second time I realized she was playing me and was just getting money because she could. Every situation is different but we all must think about what we are doing here. I am here because I like the fact that there is no attachment, I can do my thing and roll out. I can EASILY find someone to screw on the side but I do not want the attachment to another woman. I need my personal life and this life separate. I will admit I have had sex with some beautiful women in this hobby, but that's just what it was and when I shower I leave that moment right there.

I agree. I am VERY leery of gents who show any signs of boundary-crossing. I've heard way too many horror stories and witnessed one or two unfolding firsthand. Yes, I have gents who I adore and have an amazing time with, and honestly wouldn't mind spending OTC time with- BUT, in order to be comfortable I need to have those lines firmly drawn. Originally Posted by Bijou Neko

Exactly! Anyone that knows me knows I am always willing to catch up with hobbyists I like over a meal or accompany them to a event/movie OTC. I've even taken one to his softball game because I didn't want him to drive. But all of us know where the lines are.

I’ve had some providers who became wonderful friends and we remained friends after they left the business. None however have asked me to give them away at a wedding… yet.
However, being an active person, I love the opportunity at times to have someone accompany me to an event or breakfast/lunch/dinner and some time to chat.
When I had to make certain life decisions it was nice to have someone who had no stake in the game sit and give me their opinions and advice.
There are events I see that I would love to go to since I am not a stay at home person but enjoy doing things that are not always possible with family. Sometimes going to a concert, show or lecture. I love lectures.
I do at times enjoy giving gifts as a form of appreciation and because I consider that person special and even make hand crafted items because they are one of a kind and not available to anyone else.
But as I once told one provider, ‘I loved her dearly, but would never interfere with her family life, no matter what.’ She was relived to hear that.
Not sure what that makes me.

You will have some that will remain strictly business!
You will have some who are open to casual dating
You will have some who will tell you whatever she needs to tell you because it's about her money!

So I'll say this... Only you know her (I hope) and only you know the connection yall have. Because a woman or man can be so cold hearted or have their feelings numb for so long... Eventually when that person is ready... The heart opens again. If it feels right..and it's mutual.. Hey go for it! Great Chemistry is strong like dope! Good luck sweetheart

I just did a post entitled " moment of clarity " where I talked about how I had a provider who give me a sob story and asked to borrow money and after the second time I realized she was playing me and was just getting money because she could. Originally Posted by Gucci

If you're suggesting that she's leading me on and will eventually start milking me financially, that's not gonna happen. I would like to think she is more than that base on some of the personal background that I know of her. But if ever that becomes the case, a sob story is not something I'm gonna fall for.

So I'll say this... Only you know her (I hope) and only you know the connection yall have. Because a woman or man can be so cold hearted or have their feelings numb for so long... Eventually when that person is ready... The heart opens again. Originally Posted by Dr. Vanity

I'm quite familiar with this and guilty due to a bad breakup I had before. It has it's good and bad side. But yeah, you might be right and only time can tell.

I have be-friended providers who have told me they ended up having relationships with clients..so it happens.

however there comes a point where the guy serves an ultimatum of get out of the business, and that is where the problem lies.

so I would strongly advise you to NOT get involved with a provider, it won't end well.

enjoy the fantasy where in your mind she is your ATF

Noooooooo way! I just got out of a relationship with a client. He wanted me to quit escorting and see only him. He didn't want me talking to other men outside of work and had the gall to say that I shouldn't use a male photographer because he didn't want another man taking suggestive photos of me. He didn't want to hear anything about the session and he got upset when I didn't send him photos "when he wanted me to" or if I didn't call him every day. He was heavy into phone sex, something that I'm not into and I told this to him several times. His response? "We live in different states, that's all we got so get used to it." He also would accuse me of cheating all the time, and was VERY insecure. I know this sounds crazy and farfetched...but it's unfortunately true. I tried to make it work...but realized that monogamy wasn't for me and when I told him this, he flew off the handle saying that I was a phony and a liar. He knew what he was getting into and tried to guilt trip me into coming back to him (I refused and blocked him). A provider/client romance sometimes works...but for me, I'd rather not play with fire a 3rd time and get burned again!

Noooooooo way! I just got out of a relationship with a client. He wanted me to quit escorting and see only him. Originally Posted by MochaNautteBBW

Interesting thread. I hear this from quite a few providers, that their boyfriends get jealous. I don't quite understand that -- given that most guys want to have sex with any hot lady that they see. Especially a client, I mean hello hypocrisy? I dated a provider for a while, and actually I liked the fact that she enjoyed sex with other guys and that we could talk about her sessions. It made our own sex hotter, frankly. It ended badly as she tried to start taking advantage of me, though. Hint - don't let her move in until you're married - lol.

Noooooooo way! I just got out of a relationship with a client. He wanted me to quit escorting and see only him. He didn't want me talking to other men outside of work and had the gall to say that I shouldn't use a male photographer because he didn't want another man taking suggestive photos of me. He didn't want to hear anything about the session and he got upset when I didn't send him photos "when he wanted me to" or if I didn't call him every day. He was heavy into phone sex, something that I'm not into and I told this to him several times. His response? "We live in different states, that's all we got so get used to it." He also would accuse me of cheating all the time, and was VERY insecure. I know this sounds crazy and farfetched...but it's unfortunately true. I tried to make it work...but realized that monogamy wasn't for me and when I told him this, he flew off the handle saying that I was a phony and a liar. He knew what he was getting into and tried to guilt trip me into coming back to him (I refused and blocked him). A provider/client romance sometimes works...but for me, I'd rather not play with fire a 3rd time and get burned again! Originally Posted by MochaNautteBBW

Your situation is quite different, so not really comparing apples to apples here. Though I think yours is alot more complicated due to the fact that it's long distance. Everybody knows that doesn't work out in the long run. It's a good thing that you've broken up with him as things will just get worst for you.

I have be-friended providers who have told me they ended up having relationships with clients..so it happens.

however there comes a point where the guy serves an ultimatum of get out of the business, and that is where the problem lies.

so I would strongly advise you to NOT get involved with a provider, it won't end well.

enjoy the fantasy where in your mind she is your ATF Originally Posted by joesmo888

I think this should be a two way decision and not just about the guy giving an ultimatum. Both parties need to find a common ground. Something like "If you stop mongering then I'll stop providing. If you don't, then I won't". It's a question of how serious the relationship will go. Do we want to be mutually exclusive or not....

yes I always love the sugar daddy option

I don't think it should be assumed that her text was some manipulative ploy. But I also think you're making assumptions and projecting your desires onto the situation. She might have sent the text early the next morning because that's when she had time and space to send you a thoughtful text.

"I enjoy spending time with you" and "I was thinking of you" aren't necessarily the same as wanting to date you outside of the hobbying context. As others have mentioned, some providers genuinely enjoy their time with some of their clients. But if a gent misinterpreted a thoughtful message and crossed those boundaries with me, I'd disengage.

I have had a few providers hit me with that line.I miss you,was thinking about you,etc.Simple test is to text them back i miss you too do you want to hang out?.They reply yes baby i need you.Then you replay i need you to but i am short on $ today do you sill want to hang out........You will know where you stand real fast works in the SB/SD deal as well.Its a simple quick test lol