Boyfriend and The Business. Can you have both ?

i.e pimp? Where do we draw that line?? I mean, he's going to be benefitting from the $$ too - especially as it rolls in fast. Not going to go there - but ...nope, not going there. Originally Posted by Eva Damita

I don't think pimps would be considered boyfriends in the sense they are talking about here.

I've seen all kinds of relationships work that I would not want to emulate. Has nothing to do with the hobby. It's just not the dynamic I would seek for myself or anyone I care about.

I've also seen what I considered highly desirable --- almost idyllic --- relationships, that didn't work out. So I would never want to judge someone else about what kind of relationship they choose for themselves.

Having said that, there's no way I could be with a person in a committed relationship, who chose to sleep with other people, whether for pay or otherwise. I respect those who do, but it would not work for me.

The answer for me, then, is that you limit choices of who you could have a relationship with, but that doesn't mean it's not possible. I would think there would be a lot of pain involved to find the right person, though.

It can be achieved with the right two people with a strong will for each other.

First the biggest thing that will need to occur is that the two of you are very good communicators and when asked a question are honest.

Secondly the two of you cannot use the hobby as a pawn. No holding that over eithers head. You both know going in what it is so no sense bailing and crying wolf.

Third you both cannot have an ounce of jealousy and must have total trust in each other. Anything else will be the demise of your relationship.

The odds are stacked against any relationship to survive this hobby but it's not impossible and personally I'm a fan of those who try, as trying is half the battle. No successful relationship ever was formed without trying!

i.e pimp? Where do we draw that line?? I mean, he's going to be benefitting from the $$ too - especially as it rolls in fast. Not going to go there - but ...nope, not going there. Originally Posted by Eva Damita

Allow me to make clear this is not ALWAYS the case...it's only that we have to remember 'Pretty Woman' is a movie...and not for everyone , nor a reality. I personally know I can have a healthier relationship after retiring. Some folks are different. I have no folks. My playworld only is mine alone, not shared.

someone benefitting from what I do 100 ( or yes even less) percent is typically considered to be what then - in THIS world - perhaps I had the wrong idea.

It does happen, and is possible... As Marie said, can be difficult at times, but is possible....and I speak from personal experience.

^^Yes, lets's all take relationship advice from people who consider a long-term relationship, an overnighter LOL

Pretty Woman is BS; that is why there was no Pretty Woman Part II. That would have gone more into Richard Gere controlling her with 'allowances' and things like that.

I actually speak from many years experience, with the same man.

It is doable but it is also the exception and not the rule. Either they both leave the hobby or they don't. You can't have one person with one foot in, and the other person is removed.

If everyone isn't on the same page, you might as well not even try. This is coming from a woman who has never had a relationship (hobby or otherwise) last less than 5 solid years at a time....no breakups every other month.
Not until the above started to occur. I can't deal with liars. Do what you want with your penis, just keep it real with me.

^^Yes, lets's all take relationship advice from people who consider a long-term relationship, an overnighter LOL

Originally Posted by TheOriginalDannie

And who exactly would you be referring to? Surely not me as I've never made such a ridiculous statement, you know nothing of my personal life and you're talking bollocks, so you can fuck right off.

I have been in a relationship before which failed due to other reasons...

Now...
2. Case by case basis. Originally Posted by YummyMarie

So you're screening your SO's hookers? Does he get the same privilege?

I know there are some ladies who have good relationships and it works or them .I would love to know where they meet those guys lol !!!
You just need the right guy who knows it's just work and he has you . It never worked for me , if I ever met someone I usually ended up losing work , not working and constant fights because of it or related to it . In the end like other girls said most guys throw it in your face or use it as something to have over your head .If you really only want him take a break and see how it works or sometimes if you know deep down it will never work than let it go either way is hard , hope it works out for you !!

Wow That Was Great ! I am very pleased to hear so many different opinions of there own life stories and experiences from everyone.. I had a lot of really good answers and some things that I need to maybe consider for my relationship to be happy , healthy, and successful.
First.) Have an open mind and an endless heart. Love is unconditional.
Second.) Keep Each Other Balanced. I believe it is absolutely a vital thing to have.
Third.) Jealousy cannot Dwell inside of you. Once you allow for the jealousy to exist, even just a little. Each time becomes more and more. Its like a cancer that will spread through out. Taking your soul and sparing your heart. I will have the hardest time with this one , I know! All Jealousy basically is , is fear.

Anyways, Thanks to all and to all a good night. See ya :-)

Works for me, my boyfriend is actually turned on by it. Lucky for me, I need the variety of different men or I wouldn't be happy, and he likes me happy

And who exactly would you be referring to? Surely not me as I've never made such a ridiculous statement, you know nothing of my personal life and you're talking bollocks, so you can fuck right off. Originally Posted by Valerie

I do not thinck TheOriginalDannie was referring to you, but to the fucktards like me replying.

Like TheOriginalDannie did confirm that long term relationships do happen, but are rare because relationships are hard work. Basically it comes down to if you are not willing to put in the effort ... do not bother to lead each other on.

So you're screening your SO's hookers? Does he get the same privilege? Originally Posted by Dorian Gray

Sure, as long as he takes into account how much they pay for my services

I know that certain swinging couples purport to have "a better grasp" of P4P with glib rationalizations saying it only physical and not love.

I think that false belief just lulls one into a false sense of comfort.

After a while, you won't know what is physical and what is love because you cheapen love-making.

. . . You can't have it both ways, but you can convince yourself of most anything with a convenient set of beliefs. Sounds like you still have some serious soul searching to do on this issue. Maybe we all do.
Originally Posted by Fast Gunn

If you CONTINUE to confuse the insertion of your PENIS in a woman's VAGINA with the ultimate act of love, that's what you get...

This is the reason why there are so many children borne out of wedlock, right? Because of too much love? NO darling. Sex is just that. Yes, love makes you horny and want to make love to that person, but that's not the ultimate end-all be-all of love.

That's probably what's wrong now, you have no other way to express how you feel to a woman other than sex or money.

I think it's possible, but of course is going to be rarer than your standard Mom & Pop relationship.

As with all relationships, I think it's about expectations and having each partner be open and honest to the other what they are ok with so that both parties can make an informed decision as to if the relationship can work for them or not.

When someone's expectations aren't met / boundries are crossed, that's when problems (in any relationship) start to happen, imo.