Does open relationships Really work?

blowpop's Avatar
Open relationships are a lot of work. And both partners need to be very honest with themselves and aware of what their hot buttons are.

I've been in a handful over the years, and the demise of each one was jealousy. At first, everything was great and fun, but as soon as one of the primary partners feels threatened by one of the playmates (too young, too pretty, too buff, too smart...) problems happen. Resentments build. "You can, but I can't?" Endings are often very dramatic.

I think the most stable way to have openness in a relationship is to always play together, and to give veto power to both partners. That works as well as anything else I've tried.
whitechocolate's Avatar
Blowpop is so right. I speak from experience as well. Playing together is often best but I have found it hard for both partners to agree on who to play with. Raquel, you are getting a lot of good advice and you have to individualize it to you and your partner. Playing apart is the most fun but takes two exceptional people with great open communication and lots of trust to avoid jealousy which is fatal to the relationship. Both partners need to be on an equal footing and playing with others they enjoy and also be turned on in a kinky sort of way by the fact that their primary partner is playing with someone hotttt and not resent it. It can be used as a "turn on" when you are alone with your primary partner.
Eccie Addict's Avatar
If I wasn't able to commit to my SO and her be enough for me sexually then I'd be willing to bet that eventually she wouldn't be enough in other areas of our relationship.... I find it hard to believe that starting out in an open relationship would stand the test of time.
Hun I'm not looking for long term. I just miss having a boyfriend but luv my freedom. Thanks everyone for your thought.
If you're finding it hard to be with one person, then you haven't found the right person. Keep looking. Originally Posted by Energy
Eccie Addict's Avatar
I'll be your fuck buddy lol. You can see whoever you want and I won't have any issues with it at all
Lol fuck buddies are easy to get. I want a boyfriend. Anywho I have someone in mind. Wish me luck. Kisses
I'll be your fuck buddy lol. You can see whoever you want and I won't have any issues with it at all Originally Posted by Eccie Addict
rwksl's Avatar
  • rwksl
  • 07-27-2011, 09:41 PM
...I think the most stable way to have openness in a relationship is to always play together, and to give veto power to both partners. That works as well as anything else I've tried. Originally Posted by blowpop
Wise words.
whitechocolate's Avatar
Raquel, good luck with your new boyfriend. He is a lucky guy to soon have you
Eccie Addict's Avatar
Define boyfriend?

And good luck, you deserve it
Lol a person your in relationship with, cuddle, kiss, have sex, lots! go out has a couple, meet my friends meet their friends. hang, laugh, joke, talk, watch movies and like the person, later down the road maybe more then like. And thanks for the sweetness xoxo
Define boyfriend?

And good luck, you deserve it Originally Posted by Eccie Addict
Mojojo's Avatar
You can see whoever you want and I won't have any issues with it at all Originally Posted by Eccie Addict
No issues only threads

Good luck Raquel!
Lol a person your in relationship with, cuddle, kiss, have sex, lots! go out has a couple, meet my friends meet their friends. hang, laugh, joke, talk, watch movies and like the person, later down the road maybe more then like. And thanks for the sweetness xoxo Originally Posted by Raquel Ryder
Don't think EA would be a good fit then. Alot of that would require him to be away from ECCIE, and I doubt he can do that.

No issues only threads

Good luck Raquel! Originally Posted by mojojo213
Eccie Addict's Avatar
Mojo... I've calmed down lol.

Syn... Shut up man, always cockblocking lol.
They work until one of you starts having more fun, gets laid more often etc.. then the other one gets very mad.....
DaChef's Avatar
Lol a person your in relationship with, cuddle, kiss, have sex, lots! go out has a couple, meet my friends meet their friends. hang, laugh, joke, talk, watch movies and like the person, later down the road maybe more then like. And thanks for the sweetness xoxo Originally Posted by Raquel Ryder
Sounds like me.
I also cook is that ok?