Donations when to pay?

I think the donation issue isnt as much an issue with verified independents on multiple sites. I think the gents concern mostly in this thread are the new ladies who are unheard of with no rep and random toftts.

I always did multiple hour outcalls, so maybe thats why most ladies felt comfortable taking it after, especially since she can confirm Im in the room before coming. But your best believe it was clearly visible and not at all in a wallet. Paying out of a wallet is tacky to me, and I want her to feel comfortable without that concern.

I have tried to toftt and asked beforehand by phone with a lady unknown before , and they will more than likely tell you to pay first. If she insists on it an she doenst have a rep....I move on. Being 1200 dollars or more lighter on a tofft is definitely not what I want.

Stick to the reputable ones, it wont be an issue most times, AS LONG AS SHE CAN SEE IT.

Done with this thread, ANONONE and Old Sarge gave solid advice. Take or leave it as you will.

I owe a number of you an appology for my tone. Sorry.

I can't remember the last time I heard of an in call doing a grab and dash or whatever. Not the most common thing I would expect.

At an out call yea it happens. About 8 months ago 2 women were running around doing out calls pulling a gun on the clients and then robbing them. Not sure if they just moved on or HPD finally got them or someone else did the world a favor.

different escorts have wanted the cash in had to count it. some want the envelope, some want hit handed to them, some the bedroom dresser, some the or the foyer cabinet or table.... Half never say crap before hand or have it on a post or listing the others you are only left with partial instruction. Frankly, when it gets to the point I am following some as much routine it kill the mood.

I never had an issue with women on the lot higher end.

It's very very very very amazingly simple.

A considerate hobbyist will have his fee in an unsealed envelope ready to hand to the provider or place it wherever according to her instructions.

Placing it on a desk or beside the bed is not a good idea unless she specifically asks it to be placed there. Wait for her instructions.

The money doesn't have to be counted out in front of the gent, it can be removed from the room and counted while fetching the gent a drink or while he undresses.

I have never read of an established well known provider do a cash-n-dash.

However, the alert boards are chock full of well known, "reputable", long time established hobbyists that regularly short the girls.

One well known established hobbyist likes to prey on the younger, newer girls. He books a multi-hour appointment in which time he tells them how his review will get her business going etc. Then he pays for only an hour at the end. He knows these girls are too scared to make a stink.

Another will book a multi hour date including dinner. At the end, the envelope contains the fee for the BCD time only.

There are alerts of gents coming in and laying the envelope down on the nightstand and later the provider finds the envelope contains cut up newspaper.

Mnay of these gents know that the providers don't want to make waves and incur the wrath of established hobbyists.

Most girls are just sick and tired of being taken advantage of, and have adjusted their protocol accordingly. SW

It's obvious that Old Sarge attended the same "old school" I did.

I attempt to learn the lady's preference for the money transaction via her website. While there are common similarities among most providers, a particular lady may request a unique procedure or method. In the absence of website instructions, I always discreetly place an unmarked, unsealed envelope on open view right after our initial greeting.

Since the vast majority of my appointments are in-calls, I excuse myself to the restroom to shower. I invite the lady to come in and talk to me while I'm showering ... at her convenience. This accomplishes two objectives:

1. It gives her the opportunity count the money, if she deems it appropriate, without my scrutiny.
2. It doesn't leave her alone in the room feeling awkward while I'm showering.

I guess that I'm fortunate. I've never had a lady run with the money. As an educated and experienced participant in this business, I must be willing to lose the money I placed in the envelope. If I'm not ready to lose it; I have no business in the hobby. Any negative issues regarding money can be addressed in a review.

As a side note, I'm not at all comfortable with the lady counting the money while I'm immediately in her presence. I don't care if you count it, but don't do it in my presence. My reasoning has to do with issues regarding LE ... not etiquette.

I have about half who leave either cash or an envelope out in the open before we start and about half who leave cash or an envelope after we are finished, before he leaves.

I have had more than you would think completely forget and walk out without paying. Having said THAT, they have ALWAYS come back with the fee. My clients are sometimes just so relaxed that they just zone out and don't even think about it. It isn't to try to rip me off, they just don't have much brain power left! LOL!

I feel very good about my visitors, therapeutic and others, they take good care of me!

Having always paid the full agreed upon fee, I never thought of this in detail until just recently.

The third provider I was with: we went through the whole session, and then I pointed to a pretty gift bag sitting on a table and told her that was for her. I had prepared it ahead of time and it had been in full sight of her from the time she walked through the door. The donation in full was inside along with a small personal gift. She was very relieved. And I was very confused. It had never occurred to me that anyone would "short" or not pay for a session. Guess I was naive.

I called her several times after that, but she never agreed to see me again. I guess I now know why. I just made her too nervous.

Fast forward to now. I always have the envelope out on the table when the lady arrives. She is free to pick it up and walk into another room or whatever. But at the same time, I'm afraid enough of a cash n dash that I want to make sure she isn't out the door w/o BCD activities.

I tend to like reading your replies. They are based around some sense and personal experience. Originally Posted by grtrader

What a backhanded compliment. I guess, as a woman, I wouldn't possess the full intelligence to make a legitimate argument. Silly me, I thought you WANTED the female perspective.

I usually try to bring a small gift of some type and usually put the donation in it. I will tell her that I have something for her and place the gift down next to the lady or hand it to her if she reaches for it. If I do the envelope thing, I will place it in plain site with no mention made. I have only once had the lady sit there and count the donation.

Once I bought a lady a candy bar (since she stated that she really liked chocolate). I slid the donation just under the outside wrapper letting the edge of the cash peek out. Gave her the candy bar when I arrived and she laid it down. Probably 5 minutes after I left, I get a call from her asking where I left the donation. I could tell from her voice and how she spoke that she was pretty uncomfortable in having to call me. I said I left in the wrapper and apologized for not making it extremely clear. There was this long pause and I thought maybe I had not given the right amount so I tell her if something isn't right, I will come back and make it right. She says don't bother that she threw the wrapper away and didn't see the donation. She had already left her incall and was at the store and to not worry about it. I state that I was extremely sorry and that I will get her the money since it was my fault for putting it inside the candy bar wrapper since I figured that it would fall out in plain site when she opened it. I offered to meet her where ever, when ever to give her a donation to make it right. It was my fault for not making sure she saw the donation inside the candy bar. There was this pause and she says, "The candy bar wrapper? I thought you meant the condom wrapper." She then realizes that she had thrown the candy bar in her purse, finds it and finds the donation. Needless to say, I learned to be more obvious in my donation placement in the future.

When I was hobbying, I always put the money in an unsealed envelope and left the envelope someplace where the provider could see me drop it. I left it up to her to decide when to look inside. I never had any problems with being ripped off (nor do I recall any provider actually checking the envelope while I was still there.) If you're worried about being ripped off, see someone else. If you're into taking risks by finding unknown providers, the possibility of getting ripped off is one of the risks you're into.

I always put it in a gift bag and ask to freshen up (usually with a shower) before we get going. I go for at least 2 hours, so 10 mins in the shower is no big deal. This is for incall.

grtrader:
"Guessing from your first line you have taken many out to say a black tie affair or ball.. or opera or Corporate business meet / retreats. ... Or how about just grabbing jet on the spur of the moment and heading off to Italy check out Venices glass factories or go skiing in Garmich Germany? Benjamins are jump change compared to what gets shelled out in the certain crowds.

"You don't bring a girl with a high school education to a retreat to impress the corporate chain or to help you get info on what the current play is or to seal business deals. Talking when actual refinement and multi degrees along with usually 3+ languages. I could go through a list of reason why very high end escorts can ask 25,000 a night and more for their time. But unless you actually been in the spot to need or use one it probably won't make a lot of sense from the out side."

Though it may be presumptuous of me to assume that you are talking about every provider on this board, I do want to remind you to be careful. Some of us do have genius IQs, multiple degrees, and a sense of refinement that could only come from etiquette school combined with experience. Not everyone has the time to invest in becoming a "higher end" escort; if she did, she would not be able to pursue an even higher education, take care of her children, et cetera.
I express this opinion only in the hopes that if you were indeed making a sweeping generalization, you will think it over before doing it again.

The envelope is a stupid idea.

"Your honor, the money was in an envelope, so obviously, it wasn't an offer for prostitution." Yeah, that's going to work. More likely, they'll say the envelope proves you were trying to hide something. Bribes and other shady deals are done with envelopes.

You're on a jury. Are you going to buy the story that the hooker didn't think there was cash in the envelope? If a guy gives you a greeting card, do you just leave it on the table and open it later or do you open it and go "ooh" and "aah" and make a big deal over it?

It's as dumb as thinking saying "$$$" instead of $300 is going to make you safe.

As for paying up front, don't cops always like to exchange the cash first? Makes their case a lot easier if the actual money exchange took place first.

As far as cash and dash, what if the guy's a flake and decides to get his money back because he wasn't happy? Do you want to be save yourself from ripped off a few times by guys who shortchange you or get hurt by a guy who decides to take it back?

However, I'm pussy whipped, so I'll do it if the lady wants. I'm just saying it's another dumb idea.

I read a similar thread about this yesterday so I just skimmed through. I would like to give you a prime example of why ladies count the money first. Today I received an email from a well-known and respected provider asking me if the guy that used me as a reference had ever shorted me. I have seen him twice and donation was correct both times. He is a very nice man and it may have been a mistake but now that provider is $80 short. He only calls from pay phones since his wife is very nosey, so she has no way of contacting him. I feel very sorry for people that have to go through this. I will be honest and I normally don't ask for or count the money until after the session, but after reading so many bad stories I just think it is wiser to get the money situated first. For the men that are afraid about lousy service after giving the donation, you should do your research and you should not have that problem.