As a provider, what are your biggest challenges/fears?

I think you can have a healthy balance. I have been that football mom/hooker. Hard at times? Yes. My close circle of friends knows what I do on the side. They are accepting of it. No one in my family other than one of my brothers knows though, but I have always worked a real world job (except for a 1yr period) so it does make it a lot easier to conceal. In addition I have no immediate family in Texas other than my 2 kids so not lots of people prying.
Providing is such a small part of my life. I do not let it consume me. We as women/mothers/ providers are so much more than our online personas. No shame in this game as all these wonderful ladies have pointed out. We are empowering if anything. Except the ones that fall prey/victim.
This is a great thread Reese, but it also made me sad to hear those things.

Wow, what an interesting thread. I've personally been giving a lot of thought to these things lately as I've grown rather fond of a new friend I met through this board. I've really met some wonderful and interesting ladies in the 8 months or so I've been involved in the hobby and I often find myself wondering how they are and hoping that they are being treated with the respect they deserve.

I know that often this profession wouldn't be a first choice and I greatly admire the ladies that are able to make a viable career out of it. Reading of the personal sacrifices that are made saddens me in a way but also increases my admiration for those that are able to achieve a balance in their life.

Thanks everyone for sharing. I am really blessed that I have awesome friends and family members that know what I do. I am able to go home and be myself and I do not have to hide what I do. I have had some people tell me if I could do what you do I would. I have had a friend tell me not everyone can because it takes courage. I am like really you think so and he was like yes. I have the attitude you either like me or you do not and the ones that love me accept me for me.

My biggest fear is not being outed it is something else. This can be a tough lonely life for ladies. I know there are people in the world that thinks the worst of ladies but over all if it was not for us how many men would go postal, go home and yell at his wife or children or if he was a boss fire a worker just because. Life is so stressful and hard at times and seeing an escort gives him a break from it. We may see a guy for a short time but the one at home see the best in him. Thanks to all the ladies that make this world a special place and thanks guys for taking time out of your life for us.

All of guys who stepped as gentlemen here haber my utmost respect. All the ladies coming forward have my admiration. Every lady I have ever spent time with has my most sincere feelings and utmost respect. I often find myself wondering what if society were different or we had all met under different circumstamces. I've always been a romantic and a dreamer.

It would be really hard to share snippets about my life like SD did in this forum. In the private company of a close trusted friend, I may someday.

Always treat a woman like a lady.

I have been feeling very jaded lately about the hobby and the things on this board (so much so that I seriously debated a quick and quiet exit - if only I were a little less stubborn lol), but reading from the *gentlemen* here is very touching and reinforces my girlish fantasy that we provide a more than just open orifices and slutty dispositions devoid of a heart or soul. I'm aware that many hobbyists only want a fcuktoy, but I feel so much better as a person in this chosen profession to know a good number of hobbyists and providers appreciate each other as an entire person.

Once I was told by a well-known hobbyist to back-off of being myself on the boards because, as he put it, I only needed the be "flirty and sexy" and stay away from "serious topics" since "guys don't like to hear that". I never responded to that bit of advice or any of his texts from that point on. And I couldn't be more glad. If it bothers anyone that I have half a mind to dialogue about what I find interesting then they can politely go fcuk themselves. It saddens me to think of all the girls and ladies who have felt their entirety is undesirable because of instructions like his.

Thank you again to all the gentlemen who value their ladies as a whole rather than just her holes.

I too am not ashamed of my chosen profession, it is others that have a problem with it, not me. I am a provider... I provide a much needed service. I agree, a counselor of sorts. Only a few select people know what I do for work. When meeting someone new, it seems the first thing everyone asks is" what do you do?" I answer one of two ways. 1) I exercise,travel, boat, read and spend time with friends. Or 2.) I have a consulting business. Then it's , oh what kind of consulting business. I reply, oh, kind of like a life coach, I won't bore you with the details. This usually shuts them up, if not. I'm a master at turning the conversation around on them. My biggest obstacle is, I am so discreet, I do not know other providers. It can be a very lonely profession. I live alone. But try to stay as active socially as time permits. Although, I do enjoy my alone time. I wouldn't have a problems being direct and saying, I am an escort, however, I DO live in the Bible Belt. I have had many hobbyist say" you are too good to be doing this ". REALLY? Why? because I have college degrees? because Im beautiful?? Well, I happen to enjoy it, don't judge me. I feel as those are the ones who do not have respect for women who are in this by choice. I am one of those. It's not like I am at rock bottom. I have a wonderful tidy little life and I love it. So, back to the subject at hand, my biggest obstacles are ignorant narrow minded judgemental people.

To all of you - I'm sorry because all that have posted seem like sweet, smart, and grounded ladies. Ask me a year ago about "the hobby" and I'd have SUCH a different opinion. Because of this you learn not to judge people as much and I've learned to treat ladies even better than I did before because I appreciate what you do for me. I don't care about getting laid (well, let's not get crazy lol) what I'm missing at home is the closeness, feeling desired, and an excitement in my life. From the bottom of my heart, to those of you that are truly professionals - THANK YOU. Your sacrifice is appreciated and you're defiantly not just looked at as a piece meet but a counselor of sorts. I can promise to every lady that's been with me - I thank and respect the heck out of you. Dang, reading those tugs at the heart strings. Originally Posted by EasyLover214

Not to derail, but I have to say something OT to easy. First I consider you.a gentleman no matter what for being so honest.

But I can help you get the closeness, intimacy, and desire you seek at home. I learned how and have done it. Now the bad part is that may not be enough. I'm on my 2nd marriage. My 1st was horrible. My 2nd is perfect in all aspects but one. Like I'm saying it just may not be enough. The world is really a cruel shallow sad caveman like place when it comes to our most primal needs as men. Society and our SOs do.not understand it, and they will tell you that you are wrong. If you want the information I will share it for free vía PM. I warn you though there is no turning back. Your views on how men and women relate will change and all illusions society has created will be shattered. Monogamy is totally possible but she has to be sexier than you are and she needs to lay you like tile. How many relationships do you know where that is the case? For me around zero, which is why they are doomed. I didn't learn this stuff until 3 yrs into my 2nd marriage. I wish I had learned long ago.

And when Ms. Smart, funny, sexy, and I'm gonna lay you like tile comes along my SO should be super worried. She's worried now because smart and sexy and 10 yrs younger than she is threw herself at me in front of my SO and at a work party. If she would have only followed through and done me like a tiled Italian cathedral..... No man will resist that. We are programmed to want it. Its part of the reason we are all here. A lot of the women here have the hot thing down and know how to lay a man like tile.

I have been feeling very jaded lately about the hobby and the things on this board (so much so that I seriously debated a quick and quiet exit - if only I were a little less stubborn lol), but reading from the *gentlemen* here is very touching and reinforces my girlish fantasy that we provide a more than just open orifices and slutty dispositions devoid of a heart or soul. I'm aware that many hobbyists only want a fcuktoy, but I feel so much better as a person in this chosen profession to know a good number of hobbyists and providers appreciate each other as an entire person.

Once I was told by a well-known hobbyist to back-off of being myself on the boards because, as he put it, I only needed the be "flirty and sexy" and stay away from "serious topics" since "guys don't like to hear that". I never responded to that bit of advice or any of his texts from that point on. And I couldn't be more glad. If it bothers anyone that I have half a mind to dialogue about what I find interesting then they can politely go fcuk themselves. It saddens me to think of all the girls and ladies who have felt their entirety is undesirable because of instructions like his.

Thank you again to all the gentlemen who value their ladies as a whole rather than just her holes. Originally Posted by thathottnurse

Obviously whoever gave you that “advice” was someone only seeking the holes you speak of. As for speaking your mind – as I told you when we met – THAT is WHY I like you. I LOVE a woman with a brain that speaks her mind on here – especially if it’s not the popular opinion. THN has heard this a million times from me – turn on the big head and that turns on the little head. I’ve tried meeting with ladies where the entire get to know you before the session included directions to her place and it just doesn’t work for me. Some ladies may think I’m a waste of time but I have to get to know someone a bit before I’ll meet – that’s just the way I am – my P411 profile describes it perfectly but there’s not enough room on the ECCIE profile. I don’t mean to waste anyone’s time but I’m on here for a very specific reason – to meet a few great ladies that I click with and see only them on a regular basis. Some ladies on here I would LOVE to just talk with for hours because they’re fun, interesting, and smart.

I for one love unsolicited PMs from ladies that are shy but like my posts – I can get to know them too, they’re just not as publically vocal – think most of my meetings have come from chatting with a lady for a couple of weeks and THEN meeting – and when we meet boy is it great – and chances are very good that I’ll be a return visitor. My sessions are vanilla too – I will never want greek, to face fuck, or smack a lady – I want to, for all intensive purposes, make love to her. I don’t judge those that enjoy other activities, it’s just not for me – so a thread about ladies being people is great for me – and if you’re my kind of girl just send me a PM (does that turn this into a threAD for me???).

I have been feeling very jaded lately about the hobby and the things on this board (so much so that I seriously debated a quick and quiet exit - if only I were a little less stubborn lol), but reading from the *gentlemen* here is very touching and reinforces my girlish fantasy that we provide a more than just open orifices and slutty dispositions devoid of a heart or soul. I'm aware that many hobbyists only want a fcuktoy, but I feel so much better as a person in this chosen profession to know a good number of hobbyists and providers appreciate each other as an entire person.

Once I was told by a well-known hobbyist to back-off of being myself on the boards because, as he put it, I only needed the be "flirty and sexy" and stay away from "serious topics" since "guys don't like to hear that". I never responded to that bit of advice or any of his texts from that point on. And I couldn't be more glad. If it bothers anyone that I have half a mind to dialogue about what I find interesting then they can politely go fcuk themselves. It saddens me to think of all the girls and ladies who have felt their entirety is undesirable because of instructions like his.

Thank you again to all the gentlemen who value their ladies as a whole rather than just her holes. Originally Posted by thathottnurse

I agree with this 100%. I've been advised to "turn down the volume", but I think in the end, it doesn't really matter. My vibrant, cynical, and humorous posts are just a mere echo of my personality (in person). I'm very comfortable with people, and I enjoy getting to know every detail!

Not to derail, but I have to say something OT to easy. First I consider you.a gentleman no matter what for being so honest.

But I can help you get the closeness, intimacy, and desire you seek at home. I learned how and have done it. Now the bad part is that may not be enough. I'm on my 2nd marriage. My 1st was horrible. My 2nd is perfect in all aspects but one. Like I'm saying it just may not be enough. The world is really a cruel shallow sad caveman like place when it comes to our most primal needs as men. Society and our SOs do.not understand it, and they will tell you that you are wrong. If you want the information I will share it for free vía PM. I warn you though there is no turning back. Your views on how men and women relate will change and all illusions society has created will be shattered. Monogamy is totally possible but she has to be sexier than you are and she needs to lay you like tile. How many relationships do you know where that is the case? For me around zero, which is why they are doomed. I didn't learn this stuff until 3 yrs into my 2nd marriage. I wish I had learned long ago.

And when Ms. Smart, funny, sexy, and I'm gonna lay you like tile comes along my SO should be super worried. She's worried now because smart and sexy and 10 yrs younger than she is threw herself at me in front of my SO and at a work party. If she would have only followed through and done me like a tiled Italian cathedral..... No man will resist that. We are programmed to want it. Its part of the reason we are all here. A lot of the women here have the hot thing down and know how to lay a man like tile. Originally Posted by bbtony

The short answer is no – I’ve not met someone with the ENTIRE package of everything I seek. I have closeness and intimacy at home, just not the physical kind and after 18 years together at this point I know it’s not going to happen. As for what women here have – they have the smart, funny, sexy, lay you like tile thing down – I honestly wonder about some ladies how the heck they are single! I can only assume by choice or it’s like many reality shows – in the short window I’m with them life is grand – but put in the bills, cleaning the house, work, kids, pets, and everyday stress and things change.

I agree with this 100%. I've been advised to "turn down the volume", but I think in the end, it doesn't really matter. My vibrant, cynical, and humorous posts are just a mere echo of my personality (in person). I'm very comfortable with people, and I enjoy getting to know every detail! Originally Posted by brownsugarbaby

They’re wrong with you too – your personality is VERY attractive. You probably just get a different clientele – men with brains that like women with brains. Just my not so humble opinion.

Easy you can have the physical at home too.... but it may not be enough.

BSB, don't change a thing.

nurse, I would buy you coffee any day just be in the presence of your wit and smile.

Oh and ladies I'm a gentlemen and I prefer vanilla too..... but I still want to try everything there is to try unlike my friend Easy . I'm willing to try most anything at least once. If a lady really enjoys something that is new to me, I'm a very fast learner.

I had a provider ask me what I like once as she told me some of her horror stories.... my answer was "uhm.... normal. I like normal."

Thank you all.

Easy you can have the physical at home too.... but it may not be enough.

BSB, don't change a thing.

nurse, I would buy you coffee any day just be in the presence of your wit and smile.

Oh and ladies I'm a gentlemen and I prefer vanilla too..... but I still want to try everything there is to try unlike my friend Easy . I'm willing to try most anything at least once. If a lady really enjoys something that is new to me, I'm a very fast learner.

I had a provider ask me what I like once as she told me some of her horror stories.... my answer was "uhm.... normal. I like normal." Originally Posted by bbtony

Vanilla is a relative term - I THOUGHT I was a perv until I talked to some of these ladies and read posts - I too would try about anything for the right lady lol.

Easy in my limited experience I find the ladies actually really appreciate and aim to please the vanilla guys. They like normal too.