Anyone else having suicidal fantasies?

chicagoboy's Avatar
Might be waiting for a New Years blow out.... Originally Posted by pyramider
The OP could eat a Dagwood sammich to ring in the new year.
Lucas McCain's Avatar
That’s all we need is the media to get a hold of this tread and this board will be shut down too!! Then we will all be jumping off the bridge Originally Posted by soldierboy44
Over dramatic much genius? I won't be jumping off any bridges. My RL is just fine with or without this place. If yours is not, send me your personal info and address. You'll have a Henry rifle within 2 days.
I haven't read all the replies. My sister took her life in Aug 2007. She left small ones behind, the same exact ages as mine. Suffice it to say it was difficult and still is......but in a rather abstract way somehow. A bit like a rubix cube is how I describe it. You sort of just turn it over and over, trying to make sense of it, connecting with it in many ways but at the same time trying not to connect *too* much....because it's all too easy to become her.... And you don't romanticize her death and you don't romanticize the present or the future, because you know in your heart all the issues there had been and were, would still be.... But yes, it sucks to see all the happy families, the sisters in matching sweaters with their kids making cookies and gingerbread houses, to see something and want (even 10 yrs later) to call and tell her about it. But that's my family, and I know that in the end, for many reasons, that's something that I never had anyway. But perhaps I would have? There's always the what ifs....the could'vs, shouldv's, would'vs.....would now's.....

My mother in law died the 14th of this month. And it has been so so so incredibly hard to watch my husband be able to mourn with his 2 sisters. And not to throw in his face all the mean, insensitive things he has said to me over the past decade....because he had no. idea. But now we're closer to home and he gets to mourn with family. And mine is all gone while we were a continent away. And it's incredibly difficult to deal with all the heartbreak and bitterness while feeling like he gets out "easy".....
Inversion's Avatar
You should really talk to a psychiatrist before you make any bad decisions. A lot of times feeling that way is just due to chemical imbalances. Originally Posted by TheProphetJosephSmith
Yes AKA the "Ya'll need more Testosterone" imbalance. Some folks have said Product No.17 is the new "Holy Grail" - maybe try it.
Lucas McCain's Avatar
I haven't read all the replies. My sister took her life in Aug 2007. She left small ones behind, the same exact ages as mine. Suffice it to say it was difficult and still is......but in a rather abstract way somehow. A bit like a rubix cube is how I describe it. You sort of just turn it over and over, trying to make sense of it, connecting with it in many ways but at the same time trying not to connect *too* much....because it's all too easy to become her.... And you don't romanticize her death and you don't romanticize the present or the future, because you know in your heart all the issues there had been and were, would still be.... But yes, it sucks to see all the happy families, the sisters in matching sweaters with their kids making cookies and gingerbread houses, to see something and want (even 10 yrs later) to call and tell her about it. But that's my family, and I know that in the end, for many reasons, that's something that I never had anyway. But perhaps I would have? There's always the what ifs....the could'vs, shouldv's, would'vs.....would now's.....

My mother in law died the 14th of this month. And it has been so so so incredibly hard to watch my husband be able to mourn with his 2 sisters. And not to throw in his face all the mean, insensitive things he has said to me over the past decade....because he had no. idea. But now we're closer to home and he gets to mourn with family. And mine is all gone while we were a continent away. And it's incredibly difficult to deal with all the heartbreak and bitterness while feeling like he gets out "easy"..... Originally Posted by ScarletteC
Sorry to read that about your sister. My children are my world but so are my siblings. Pretty much everything in my life is replaceable. It's just insurance and a deductible. But they are not.
  • bw357
  • 12-26-2017, 07:04 PM
Over dramatic much genius? I won't be jumping off any bridges. My RL is just fine with or without this place. If yours is not, send me your personal info and address. You'll have a Henry rifle within 2 days. Originally Posted by Lucas McCain
I'm sure they'll get it right or you get your guns back. If you're serious you have a lot of faith in people. And you're not worried about any legal issues IF one them happens to be successful?
Lucas McCain's Avatar
I'm sure they'll get it right or you get your guns back. If you're serious you have a lot of faith in people. And you're not worried about any legal issues IF one them happens to be successful? Originally Posted by bw357
You're making the silly assumption that I would ever actually mail registered guns in my name to complete strangers on a whore board. Are you this dense? I think everyone caught my sarcasm but you. You have been smart to only have one post in almost 7 years. You should not have made it two. I am not sending any of my Henry rifles to some fuck up on a whore board who wants to die. I did not buy them for that.
  • bw357
  • 12-27-2017, 05:14 AM
I didn't catch your sarcasm and I'm not sure anyone else did. I thought the OP had a problem but now I wonder about your state of mind. Let us know how you feel.
pyramider's Avatar
The OP is trolling, and has done this before.
bigwill832's Avatar
You said, "I want to die because I live a valueless, loveless, empty life."

The only person who can provide value, love, and a full life is you. It value, love, and a sense of fulfillment is not just going to drop into your life. You need to find what you have a passion for and surround yourself with it as well as people who hold the same type of passions. If you are sitting around by yourself all of the time, that right there is your number one problem. An idle mind in a lonely place is the worst thing to have. Anything that makes you upset or feel bad gets into a constantly swirling maelstrom that gets worse and worse as time goes on. You don't necessarily have to get out and talk to anyone. You just have to get out. Go find those things you enjoy and do them. Fuck worrying about what others say or think. If you need to move, move. If you need to get a new job, get a new job. Whatever you need to do to move away from the negative, do it. Will offing yourself solve your problems? Yeah, actually it will. You won't have to deal with them anymore. Then at the same time, you don't get to play with hookers, bust a nut, feel that euphoric feelings of post orgasm. You don't get to laugh at other people doing stupid shit on the internet. You don't get to eat your favorite food and say "Oh shit I love this stuff." So, just remember, you can do it and not have your problems but at the same time you don't get the other side of life either.
ElisabethWhispers's Avatar
That's not going to work. My guns are all registered in my legal name. I'll need your legal name and address. PM me with that info and you'll have one of my Henry rifles by next year if you want one and you can register it in your name. I don't think that's unreasonable to ask of you for a free rifle. Why would it matter if you decide again that you want to kill yourself and I know your real name and address? It's not like I could ever tell anyone that I like to mail Henry rifles to people I've never met on a whore board who have suicidal thoughts.

I'll put it out there, anyone who wants a free Henry rifle, send me your real name and address and I'll verify it. It's a simple verification process but I'll know that it's actually you. If you post again on this board after you have received it, I want my rifle back. If you blow your fucking head off, I'm glad I helped. Your estate can keep the rifle. I won't want it back. Deal? Originally Posted by Lucas McCain
Dammit. That is fair.

I just wanted the gun. I'm female and from my understanding, and this certainly applies to me, if I were to kill myself ... I wouldn't use a rifle or a shotgun to do so.

Drats. Thought that I might get a rifle in the mail. Now, with THOSE boundaries in place, I simply do not qualify for one.

Henry rifle. Haven't heard that name/gun type since watching Silverado (which is a great movie!).

Is that the type of gun that Lucas McCain used?

Oh ... and I already have a smallish shotgun and a 9mm. Guess that I really don't need a third gun.

Happy new year, Lucas. Thanks for explaining it all to me. That is why you make the big bucks, obviously.

Happy new year to all,
Elisabeth
normalguy21's Avatar
Funny so many people fighting to stay alive and others trying to figure out away not to .

The rush one gets from staring down death .

The way it never is the same rush .

Being left all a lone and nothing seems as though it was meant to be.

Back when i was a crazy son of a bitch i was brought in DOA twice .Both from shock from severe wounds.

One week alone i was hospitalized three times from being wounded .

Looking for that next rush are death de fie ing feat to gain the acceptance of others are achieve that next level of bullshit .

I have lost just about everyone i ever bounded with .

I have been to alot of funerals and chose not to go to others .

As i just tried to count the amount of suicides that have brought blows to my friendship with these people that took there own lifes i found them to many to count right now .

Over 10 and under 15 somewhere around there .

I dont go to funeral's of people that take there own life's even if it was my brother .You selfish mother fucker

So many trying to stay alive and you want to kill yourself .............................. ..............

Lat time i heard of this a friend got on a plane to vegas and when the door opened the person got punched in the face and thrown down the stairs and jumped on to be beat .

They fought back . no longer aconcern they wanted to live they still had will to live ..........

Does someone need to come slap you into finding out if you will fight back ...............
chicagoboy's Avatar
The only thing the OP has posted that I actually believe:

I want to die because I live a valueless, loveless, empty life. Originally Posted by zacknite
tinman483's Avatar
So yea I did just a few weeks ago. Had it planned out. just wasn't sure on timing yet.
Then I remembered (I was raised Catholic. now recovering catholic!) Thou shall not murder. It is same either suicide or someone else it is still murder.
That is when I changed my mind.
And NO I'm not trying get all religious on anyone! So I don't need to hear it.
There are choices we all make in life. Don't mean I will change some of mine though.
annie@christophers's Avatar
Do not listen to these people.. come to nola.. get drunk..get laid.. laugh and dance naked in the street!! ( run the FUK away from your mean brethren!!)

Fucking Jesus. Just hang on cause you will surely upset sombody!!

Lucas. Chicago and especially u PYRAMIDER...you should be ashamed of yourselves. If it happens you won't forgive yourselves and then it's to late...j.s

And yes I been there.. it's horrible..

XXOO annie