Married newbie questions

I agree with the two posts above. She's already suspicious. No matter how many guys think they are James Bond, 90% of not getting caught is the SO thinking things are fine. The old adage is once the local press starts investigating, you're done.

Your SO has your finances on lockdown and is able to control what apps you have on your phone. (?!?). That's the type of spouse who is very likely to employ apps to track your phone, gps devices on your car, keystroke loggers etc.

You mentioned she saw emails from providers. She's likely googled their info and found her way into here and is still 3 steps ahead of you.

Walk away. She seems willing to work on things, give that your best shot. Otherwise things could get really ugly when this all comes crashing down and she has a mountain of evidence to bury you.