Is it okay to "negotiate" a "date"

It's been a few years, but I used to see one of the most famous providers on here. After the first two or three times, I would ask her to meet me for a drink somewhere, usually close to my hotel or her place, and then a bcd session. We never really talked about money, but I always paid her enough, I guess, because she never complained and came back two or three more times. But the amount I paid her wasn't exactly her normal hourly rate X the number of hours total. It was more like 1/2 of normal for the "drink" part of it, and then full pay for the last part...

It's a wonder to me how any of you unhappy, crabby PEOPLE ever get laid. Good God!

It's easy...post an ISO or see a lady that you like a few times then ask her if she is interested.

Most of the ladies here appreciate the clients that treat us well and yeah most of us like to be treated like ladies. Most of us also know that our Stuff isn't made of Platinum...so be a gentleman and ask nicely and see what happens.

normally girls dont negotiate they're prices but some will

It's a wonder to me how any of you unhappy, crabby PEOPLE ever get laid. Good God! Originally Posted by reese foster

OMG Reese, there's just something sexy as hell about a lady who can tell it like it is!

Come on. If you arrive with your donation in full, and the lady gives you 20 mins of play time instead of an hour, you're gonna be pissed because that was plainly NOT the agreement. Its the same thing in the reverse. Don't agree (or accept the offer of services at a given rate) and then try to pull some kind of counter offer later for a lower rate. Its crass and rude...and that's not business, its dirty dealing. Originally Posted by Nina Rae

Nina, just a side question...How do you propose we deal with this scenario if I book an hour long session and then find out after 20 minutes that the provider is not MSOG...and says, session is over ? Have we gone from paying from time to paying for activities ? Just asking because what you described happens here often.

I think this is a case where Steve Anderson's comment seems applicable.

It's a wonder to me how any of you unhappy, crabby PEOPLE ever get laid. Good God! Originally Posted by reese foster

It could be a cry for help. Or maybe it's my insatiable hunger for you trying to speak out.

I'd say a provider you have seen before and knows you is far more likely to enter into such a discussion than one that you have never seen before. Being a repeat (as well as being known) definitely helps out.

But in theory there's nothing wrong with asking. Some will take offense, and I'd suggest you move along. Others might be interested enough in asking more about what you want, and there will be some that would take you up on it.

Yeah, time is money, but everyone's time is worth something to them. If you have the time and nothing scheduled, I see it potentially as a nice meal, maybe some good conversation, and then some fun activities. It's like when you go to a strip club and the lady walks by and asks "do you want a dance?". I always tell them no thanks. But when they come up, sit down, and make the effort, I always buy them a drink and usually accept their offer for a dance when they ask. Personally I don't care how hot the lady is if she's not going to make an effort.

So go ahead and be polite and ask. As others have pointed out in threads, we do have an abundance of ladies around town. Surely someone would be happy to take you up on your offer.

It's a wonder to me how any of you unhappy, crabby PEOPLE ever get laid. Good God!

It's easy...post an ISO or see a lady that you like a few times then ask her if she is interested.

Most of the ladies here appreciate the clients that treat us well and yeah most of us like to be treated like ladies. Most of us also know that our Stuff isn't made of Platinum...so be a gentleman and ask nicely and see what happens. Originally Posted by reese foster

Wow Reese, I don't think I've ever seen you agitated. It's sassy and sexy all in one. You're right, some of us are crabby lately and I'm one of them. I apologize to the OP if I came off like an asshole. I apologize to you Shea, I know I was a asshole to you.

I've been on edge lately and I haven't had any hobby strange in months and rarely get any familiar.

Sorry for the derail.

So, if you have a request like the one that started the thread...be polite and ask nicely (good tip for many things) in an appropriate way and the laws of economics or mutual attraction may work in your favor. Does that about sum it up?

Long thread...but I actually learned some things from the discussion (not the be nice part...I knew that)

flboy65,

A number of the ladies on this board will tell you that it is not ok to "negotiate" the rate.

I say, if they want to pay sticker... when it is their money... let em.

You know the relationship between yourself and this provider better than anyone else here. That should give you some insight into how she might view this.

I might phrase this more as an offer, rather than a negotiation. For example: "Name, I would really enjoy taking you out for dinner at ???, and having 2 hours of fun afterward. I am ready to spend $? for the evening. Would that work for you?"

This leaves it open for her to say sorry, or make a counteroffer. It is straight forward, you are letting it be known what you expect, and you are leaving the choice to her.

Done in such a way, it doesn't seem demeaning to me, but I won't be surprised is some of the ladies chime in to say what a lunkhead I am.

By the way, that type of offer has worked in the past with a couple favorite ladies!

NO----It is not okay to negotiate a date.
-look at it this way. providers are similar to medical doctors. they provide a service of time and companionship for a donation. if you go to your doctor, then you must pay what the doctor asks for, otherwise, the doctor will point you to the door and remind you that he has plenty of other patients that need his attention. in this scenario, bargaining does not work. if you cannot afford the doctor, the look for a clinic, where the fees are more affordable.
-therefore, my final piece of advice is the following: Learn to respect a provider similar to how you respect your doctor. Originally Posted by genesis

Actually, for a while I ended up going sans health insurance. I approached my doctor who agreed for me to pay the contractual price he would have been paid, if I was insured. (This would typically save me 60% or so!) He only asked that I pay at the end of the appointment. He liked it, as they didn't have to deal with all the paperwork of the insurance company, and wait 3 months for payment. He joked they were a bit dissapointed when I got another job, and went back on insurance.

So... Yes. Everything is negotiable!

providers are similar to medical doctors. they provide a service of time and companionship for a donation. Originally Posted by genesis

I have never paid a doctor for time and companionship, and I have never paid a provider to save my life. It may have felt like I was so horny I was going to die, but I am pretty sure it isn't a terminal illness. . .



. . .just thought we might need a reality check in this thread.

I have never paid a doctor for time and companionship, and I have never paid a provider to save my life. It may have felt like I was so horny I was going to die, but I am pretty sure it isn't a terminal illness. . .



. . .just thought we might need a reality check in this thread. Originally Posted by ANONONE

Damn it ANONONE!!! I read this whole damn thread looking to see if anyone was going to comment on how silly it was to compare paying a doctor for, "time and companionship" to the time of a provider on a date and I get to the last post and you stole my thunder!

I am not sure why anyone would pay a doctor for companionship. Maybe I just go to the wrong doctors. I've had many breakfasts, lunches and dinners with many physicians and trust me, nobody pays them for their companionship. To compare a doctors' time to a providers' is ridiculous. Doctors go through years of school, residency and more importantly, they have an expertise that no one else has - they can keep you alive.

Denton Seek makes a great point. I know many people who refuse to pay market value for damn near everything and in this economy, they usually don't. I'm lazy and I hate to haggle so I never negotiate anything but I see why people do so.

Having said that, I would never in a million years pay someone to have dinner with me. I don't mind paying for drinks, food, etc. but never for their "time." I guess it's all relative but the thought of knowing that someone is eating and having drinks with me because I have 2 OK's from providers and an ATM card is way too much for my ego to take; at least at this stage in my life, but maybe I'll reconsider in 20 years.

To the OP, you should just do what you feel comfortable with and if you don't feel you can afford the rates for their "time", as many have said, move on to someone who is more in line with your budget.

It could be a cry for help. Or maybe it's my insatiable hunger for you trying to speak out.

Originally Posted by Rambro Creed

There is a cure for hunger, ya know?

ftboy, No. I'm just saying that if I know a provider or if a provider is interesting in talking to me or whatever, then I think it's okay, without paying for an appointment, to meet them and buy them lunch, drinks and/or dinner. If, however, I want that meal to be part of the experience, then I should pay for her time for both.