providers online dating on the rise

There are over 3000 LISTED swinger clubs in the USA alone.. That's just "Clubs". There are probably 30-50 "house parties" a month right here in Austin, and they are NOT considered "clubs".
Having run one of the better clubs for 11 years, I can tell you, without being smart ass or snarky, you are wayyyy behind the curve. I can't tell you how many "parents" attended our club. If you think sharing your woman, is an indication of lack of love, or lack of respect.. I'll never convince you otherwise. Just understand, while you are not in the boat alone (as for attitudes about that activity), I will say, you have some pretty puritanical ideas. It's not for everyone, but you might keep in mind, There's a reason that Cruise ships fill up with special swinger events, three hotels in Vegas fill up every year for the NASCA meet, there are Swingers resorts all over the Caribbean. A major event is in Florida every year attracting 10,000 + attendees.

I'm not trying to "sell" anyone on this, that's all personal choice, but to think there must be something wrong with those folks is simply close minded and uninformed. You say you aren't jealous, or possessive... I would challenge that statement.

nuglet...I miss the "Jungle"

Thanks Agentx. Perhaps, out of all the hardlegs, you are one of the few that have a clue what I mean. You know I'm not knocking them, I'm knocking their lack of knowledge or maturity. It's funny, they'll go out a fuck a girl, but god forbid their mate want to be in on the fun.. pfft

There are a couple of implied assumptions in this thread hurting my head.

First, what fool would want to meet someone and enter into a committed relationship then make a "full disclosure" of their PAST. Do you really think a guy planning to get married has some kind of ethical obligation to tell his future spouse all of the details of his sex life in the years before they met (pro or otherwise)? What fool women would ask. I suppose if she flat out asks "ever have sex with a pro" you shouldn't lie so "yes" or be prepared to hold your ground on MYOB, but now is about now.

Second, why assume that if you meet a pro on a dating site that she's going to be an easy lay? OK you can assume she doesn't think sex is any big deal, but there are a lot of women who feel that way. If she's out looking for a non professional relationship that's a whole different context than p4p. You think you're going to be the predator? I doubt it.

Thanks Agentx. Perhaps, out of all the hardlegs, you are one of the few that have a clue what I mean. Originally Posted by nuglet

There are, I suspect, more than a few.

I found this statement and thought I'd post it just as general info. It's not gonna change anybodies mind, but it's offered to show the misconception that some have about sex, wives, girlfriends (and B.F.'s) possession, cheating, jealousy, etc..
This in NOT my writing, it's a general consensus of the thought process of people in the lifestyle. I think many would be surprised and the feelings that swingers have about the subject...

"There have been some length discussions about using swinging to prevent cheating. My view remains that it doesn't work. Swinging is about honestly, openness, trust and shared experiences. Cheating is about lies, concealment, secrecy and hidden experiences. Swinging builds relationships. Cheating damages them. They are antithetical. Swinging is not a cure or prevention for cheating."

Comparing swinging to cheating is like comparing eating fast food to eating dog shit.
Neither is particularly healthy for a fit body but one sure taste better and is less harmful than the other when you're hungry.

Swinging builds relationships? When a relationship starts out healthy with both loving partners taking care of one another's needs I have a hard time imagining that their relationship will grow even stronger as a result of inviting outsiders under the sheets.. I would love to see that conclusive study.

I'm not saying it ain't so because I can't speak for anyone but myself. I just can't find the logic in that statement. I certainly can understand why active swingers would make the claim.

Also I am not saying swinging is bad. It's a lot of fun in fact with someone you don't particular have any emotional attachment to.

Anyway the main topic was ........ oh yeah provider's online dating on the rise.

Swinging is a activity that requires a couple to be pretty secure in their relationship to work - goes without saying. Jealousy and disparate expectations kills the experience.

I've had a couple of S.O's that I've been with at swing clubs. The GF that was most communicative about sex and relationship stuff had the best overall experience. And I think the women in many cases (after their first swinging experience) initiate the activity moreso than the guys.

Example: one GF would check and see if swing clubs were nearby when we went on vacation. It would be one of the first things she'd do. And a lot of times, we'd only go and watch others fucking (she found this very hot).

Cody;
Not knocking your opinion buddy. Just shows a lack of life experience and maturity. You're possessive, and jealous. Lots of folks are. It's not a fault, it's a characteristic. You'll have sex with an escort, while "saving yourself" for the "real thing".. good luck with that.

"Speaking only for myself the whole benefit to being in a one-on-one loving relationship is that elusive magical bond and trust that can only exist between two people. " THAT'S BS, except where you admit "speaking ONLY for myself"
Fucking outsiders breaks that bond polluting that magic for the perpetrator whether or not the other partner finds out. also bs the phrase "....other partner finds out".. that my friend is CHEATING. They shouldn't need to "FIND OUT", unless someone is lying or keeping a secret. I realize this opinion will sink like a brick on an escort site but it is My truth regardless. At least you admit that you "YOUR" TRUTH. There are other truths also. That's like "she not the "right one", she the one for "right now".

None so blind as those that WILL NOT SEE. Nothing wrong with that, just don't believe your "ideal relationship" isn't for everyone, anymore than mine is. But I'm not judging you, it's a shame you don't take that same road.

No sense in continuing this ..................

Cody;
Not knocking your opinion buddy. Just shows a lack of life experience and maturity. You're possessive, and jealous. Lots of folks are. It's not a fault, it's a characteristic. You'll have sex with an escort, while "saving yourself" for the "real thing".. good luck with that.

"Speaking only for myself the whole benefit to being in a one-on-one loving relationship is that elusive magical bond and trust that can only exist between two people. " THAT'S BS, except where you admit "speaking ONLY for myself"
Fucking outsiders breaks that bond polluting that magic for the perpetrator whether or not the other partner finds out. also bs the phrase "....other partner finds out".. that my friend is CHEATING. They shouldn't need to "FIND OUT", unless someone is lying or keeping a secret. I realize this opinion will sink like a brick on an escort site but it is My truth regardless. At least you admit that you "YOUR" TRUTH. There are other truths also. That's like "she not the "right one", she the one for "right now".

None so blind as those that WILL NOT SEE. Nothing wrong with that, just don't believe your "ideal relationship" isn't for everyone, anymore than mine is. But I'm not judging you, it's a shame you don't take that same road.

No sense in continuing this ..................
Originally Posted by nuglet

You're taking two entirely different topics and using them out of context.

The whole "finding out" comment was specifically about a provider not disclosing what she does for a living while simultaneously fucking a new potentially serious love interest.

It specifically stated he might not be so happy to find out she's been kissing and fucking him only after sucking dicks , opening her legs and spreading her cheeks all day.
Cheating and swinging had ZERO to do with the statement. It was about providing and dating.

So according to you any man who truly cares about his partner and doesn't want to share that part of their intimate lives with total strangers is immature, jealous and insecure. Wow!
That has got to be one of the most distorted and twisted views I've seen on the board. It is certainly one for the books.

As I stated earlier I am not the jealous type. If I see other men eyeing my lady I take pride in the fact that she is with me. Why wouldn't they want her? I did.

If I see them hitting on her I am comfortable in the knowledge that she is with me as I am with her even if I'm not around. She can handle herself just fine.

What I won't tolerate is a man intrusively imposing himself upon her just as I won't put up with her deliberately trying to make me jealous. There is no love in that.

Based upon your view of life an important part of my passage into maturity, security and true manhood is my willingness to pass my partner around to total strangers? Do you see how absurd that reads?

To make it clearer for you. Would you teach your daughter that this is OK and that the right man for her to marry will be the one secure and mature enough to let his friends fuck her?

I certainly Hope Not

Not everyone views monogamy as necessary to validate a relationship. Not everyone views intimacy as something that is damaged if someone else shares it. You can believe both, but don't try to imply that your view is the only one or even the correct one. It is simply yours.

I have to say, your posts in this thread have a pretty negative view about women who have sex (especially the last "would you let your daughter" gambit, as if somehow an active sex life is something you have to protect those you care about from at all costs.) You also said earlier you haven't actually seen a provider in over a year.

I ask without malice and with curiosity, then: why are you here?

You also said earlier you haven't actually seen a provider in over a year.

I ask without malice and with curiosity, then: why are you here? Originally Posted by Qziz

Malice or not that is a pretty ballsie question coming from someone with Zero reviews.. I was under the impression that the board was for those interested in discussing hobby issues whether or not they are currently actively booking sessions.

When I start posting reviews for sessions I didn't have, stop contributing topic wise, become a total A-hole or turn into another Humpty then you might have a point. Otherwise deal with it.

In fact at zero reviews you've contributed a hell of a lot less than I have as a member. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.

I have to say, your posts in this thread have a pretty negative view about women who have sex (especially the last "would you let your daughter" gambit, as if somehow an active sex life is something you have to protect those you care about from at all costs. Originally Posted by Qziz

Equally absurd. A negative view of women who have sex? The question was whether he would encourage his daughter to marry someone who was secure and mature enough to pass her around to his buds. Her enjoyment of sex and active sex life had nothing to do with it.
In what part of any one of my posts do I impart a negative view of women who enjoy sex or who have an active sex life?

Malice or not that is a pretty ballsie question coming from someone with Zero reviews..

When I start posting reviews for sessions I didn't have, stop contributing topic wise, become a total A-hole or turn into another Humpty then you might have a point. Otherwise deal with it.

In fact at zero reviews you've contributed a hell of a lot less than I have as a member. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.

Equally absurd. A negative view of women who have sex? The question was whether he would encourage his daughter to marry someone who was secure and mature enough to pass her around to his buds. Her enjoyment of sex and active sex life had nothing to do with it.
In what part of any one of my posts do I impart a negative view of women who enjoy sex or who have an active sex life? Originally Posted by Codybeast

Your # of reviews just serves to show you are using a double standard, not that you have much to offer in this arena. You'll post about somebody's girlfriend or wife you fucked, and then claim to not understand how anyone could do that.. or "allow" (again a possessive) it to happen. So, you've been here 2 years, fucked at least 4 women that you want to brag and share info about, but it's no "YOUR GIRL".. Handy.

Couples do not "allow" or "permit". They engage and share their lives.

As for "would I encourage...." YES, if she was happy with the guy. Rather than be uptight, judgmental and hypocritical, YOU BET I would. But that would be based on her own choice. I'm married, I swing, and we're very very happy with each other, YOUR POINT?

And whether he has any reviews is irrelevant.. I do not review everyone I see. Maybe he's see 100 ladies, do you know otherwise? You just feel you're "special" and more Moral than some others.. and yet you are posting, dating, buying women, having them spread their legs (as you like to say) and passing judgement... pfft and finally, you again show your bias with the phrase "pass her around to his buds.. In the swinger lifestyle, it doesn't work that way. Nobody "passes" anyone around. Again you show your Possessiveness, like "she" is your property. That doesn't contribute to a good couple relationship.. and yet.. there are groups that enjoy THAT EXACT THING. A M/S relationship is very common and requires trust and desire on both ends.. (well, maybe not "literally")

We are ALL in the hobby. If we are honest with ourselves, I think ALL of us would like an emotional love component in our life in addition to an orgasm that I'm sure all of us get when we want one. In short, I don't think the providers or the hobbiests are any different. Each of us reveal ourselves gradually to others as we see fit and when we believe that timing is right. Personally, I think it would be great to have a relationship with a provider. The sexiest most open and honest women I know.

. Personally, I think it would be great to have a relationship with a provider. The sexiest most open and honest women I know. Originally Posted by dbuddy

Agreed with everything you wrote in your post except with what's quoted above.

sixx