Developing feelings for my provider

Ok, I have been there. Friday, in fact. I just ended my 15 month long relationship with a man who was client in Dec 2012. He talked me into stopping providing and moving in with him. He claimed after just a few sessions that he was in love with me and would divorce his wife. I fought this and resisted it very hard. But the more I saw him, the more I liked him. So I posted somewhere on ECCIE that I had fallen in love and was getting out of the hobby and so was he.
I really didn't think it could happen, but then I thought about it, and both clients and providers are people, and everyone deserves love, no matter their profession. I mean does the majority of the board expect every provider to be single? We're only human. And he is a great guy. Responsible, good job, kind and he really loved me and wanted to take care of me.
I let my guard down and fell in love with him too, and he actually did divorce his wife and we moved in together right away. I went from being a low volume provider seeing 3 or 4 clients a week to a full time homemaker, which was fine with me. I'm a homebody and love to take care of my home.
We were so happy, and made plans for our future together. I met his family, he met mine and we spent this past Christmas at his parents. He treated me very well and took care of me. We didn't argue much, but when we did he never lost his temper and called me names or put me down, like," you're just a f'ing whore" or something like that. He never did that. We had lots of fun and a great sex life.
But of course, here I am, back on ECCIE and P411. Nothing major happened, we just got bored, the engagement never came, and I started feeling like just a housekeeper while he worked. We still love each other, just not in the way to get married and live passionately ever after.
But I don't have regrets for the past 15 mths, I have lots of wonderful memories. We plan to stay close, as we still live together, and it will take me a while to find an apartment complex I can get a lease in with no verifiable income. Anyone have any suggestions? Or anyone need a roommate? My furniture will stay here until I have somewhere to put it. All of our possessions are blended together and it will take months to finish moving out after I find a place. I'll work out of an extended stay now for 3 days a week and then come back home to pack and take care of my housework.
So overall, it was a great relationship that just ran it's course. I have nothing bad to say about him, he took really good care of my every need and I had 15 mths where I could sleep late and do whatever I wanted, get my rest and shop, while taking care of the housework for my guy. I firmly believe it CAN work. Clients and Providers are people, why shouldn't they fall in love. Just because my relationship didn't go the distance doesn't mean someone else's won't. This is actually the most amicable breakup I've ever had. For those of you who said this shouldn't happen, why not? If both parties are of age and fall in love what's wrong with it? I do miss the closeness of the relationship, but I was also getting a little bored, and I missed working, especially my regulars.
I feel like a brand new newbie, and I'm so excited about my first appointment! And I still think my ex; or my former client, is a pretty great guy. If and when he starts hobbying I will give him glowing references. And he plans on writing a review of one of our last "experiences" here at home.
It was easy to reactivate my P411 and I just wrote to the mods here and they got my showcase back up right away. All I have to do is take some new pics. I look the same, except longer hair, as I let it grow out. But I've never had pics a year old before and I'm not comfortable unless they're no more than 3 or 4 mths old. So new pics coming, but I am already booking for next week! Ya'll come help break this "newbie" in again! I've been totally monogamous for 15 mths and I'm ready to break out!
GINGER KATT

gingerkittykitty@hotmail.com

https://www.preferred411.com/P78204

In my two decades of hobbying, I've never fucked anyone I didn't love--though that love did not always survive the session. At the risk of starting a very one-sided fight, I'd hazard the proposition that the willingness to give our heart completely and to see it broken every time, is part of what makes us men.

If by "it worked" you mean that you were able to experience a 15-month relationship and part as friends, then I guess yours was a best-case scenario. Most folks are looking for a little more permanency in their relationships.

If by "it worked" you mean that you were able to experience a 15-month relationship and part as friends, then I guess yours was a best-case scenario. Most folks are looking for a little more permanency in their relationships. Originally Posted by TinMan

^^^ this. And you were not working while in the relationship. You gave it up. He paid ur way. Easy. Not complicated at all to be taken care of by one man and take care of one man's needs. I'm not judging your personal preference but if I didn't have kids and someone wanted to turn this ho back into a housewife (and I liked them just as much) I wouldn't even worry about getting bored. Relationships are work after "the honeymoon phase" (typically infatuation has about a one year shelf life so ur on track there) and require commitment to the relationship rather than just enjoying the ride. Chalk this one up to a lesson learned that u probably have no need for a relationship either now or in the future bc after the infatuation ends so does the relationship. You had it pretty good from what it sounds like. It doesn't get much better than that if being a housewife is what you want.

I am glad y'all were able to part ways amicably. That's the best way to do it if at all possible. Most people aren't capaple of that so congratulations on being an adult.

And welcome back! I remember ur post back then when I was relatively new. Glad it worked out for you for a year or so. Too bad y'all couldn't keep the flames going for the long haul but it sounds like it was a good run. Thanks for sharing your story.

Very nice story...thanks for sharing. Relationships are tough.....no matter what professions are involved

I hear you Jessica! I've been with a few providers many times that I could love in a heartbeat. Even developed a bit of a crush on one. However you got to keep your shit in perspective.

No no no Bad bad bad run run run Originally Posted by Jessica Jade

Addendum to my last post: I have no opposition to loving/being loved by a provider. She's just as human as any other woman. However I think you'd need to be able to grasp and understand the difference between love and sex. Especially if she's sharing her sex with other people.

Very nice story...thanks for sharing. Relationships are tough.....no matter what professions are involved Originally Posted by joey1234

Except she wasn't working during the 15 month relationship.

Developing feelings for my provider...Suggestions? Originally Posted by joey1234

STOP IT

^^^ this. And you were not working while in the relationship. You gave it up. He paid ur way. Easy. Not complicated at all to be taken care of by one man and take care of one man's needs. I'm not judging your personal preference but if I didn't have kids and someone wanted to turn this ho back into a housewife (and I liked them just as much) I wouldn't even worry about getting bored. Relationships are work after "the honeymoon phase" (typically infatuation has about a one year shelf life so ur on track there) and require commitment to the relationship rather than just enjoying the ride. Chalk this one up to a lesson learned that u probably have no need for a relationship either now or in the future bc after the infatuation ends so does the relationship. You had it pretty good from what it sounds like. It doesn't get much better than that if being a housewife is what you want.

I am glad y'all were able to part ways amicably. That's the best way to do it if at all possible. Most people aren't capaple of that so congratulations on being an adult.

And welcome back! I remember ur post back then when I was relatively new. Glad it worked out for you for a year or so. Too bad y'all couldn't keep the flames going for the long haul but it sounds like it was a good run. Thanks for sharing your story. Originally Posted by thathottnurse

Yes THN, I had it pretty good and I was very happy for the most part. Boredom isn't why we split up, I gladly would have continued being a homemaker forever, if the feelings were still there. I know after the initial "honeymoon" phase passion can die down a bit, but that wasn't really a problem either. The sex was still hot. We just came to the realization that while we love each other, we're not in love with each other in the way that we should be to get married. I know I'm an escort; and some people assume we're just incredibly loose and have no morals; but that's not the case of course. I've been married twice and had two long term live in situations, (3 counting this one I guess), and in each case when I lived with someone it was with the expectation that we were getting married at some point. And I am strictly monogamous when I am in a relationship. I've never cheated on any one.
So we moved in with the full expectation of getting married, even though in the back of my mind was the thought that he was a fairly active hobbyist who frequently cheated on his wife and lied to her. I told myself it would be different when we were married. But those little nagging thoughts wouldn't go away! Like I said he's a wonderful, good man and I don't judge anyone at all. I love hobbyists and I couldn't care less if my clients are married or not. But my future husband? So I just decided to be happy with what we had, and I do love being a homemaker and taking care of a man. But that old fashioned part of me that wanted marriage never went away, and after his very contentious divorce, he decided that he wasn't sure he ever wanted to get married again. Which turned out to be a good thing, because we have decided we're better off as friends. But I had made it clear from the start that I wasn't interested in just living together for years. I want the protection of marriage if I'm in love and I think it will last forever. It's important for making medical decisions and insurance and survivorship benefits. And he's not just leaving me high and dry, he's going to help me get into an apartment and arrange movers and be there for me when I need him. I'm sure he'll be in my life forever. But when and if I get married, I want to know that it's what we both really want to do, that head over heels euphoria. I think it's out there! Although I certainly don't plan on dating any clients, lol! I like being a girlfriend an hour or two at a time! And just so I can get started working I'm going to spend a few days at an extended stay hotel starting Monday and I'm a little nervous because I've never worked out of a hotel. I'm a complete homebody and want my own apartment. Not sure where to ask this; but does any one know how a provider can lease an apartment with no check stubs or verifiable income?
Sorry for the long posts, but I do appreciate the feedback. And I looked back on the posts when I was leaving (in Dec 2012 and Jan 2013), and I just cringe, lol! I sound kind of smug like I think I'm Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman". Well like someone else said; lesson learned.

Ginger, perhaps he can co-sign the apartment lease. What an angel if he did.
Cool that u two gave it a go.

Every time I start to get feelings for a provider, I stop and think how many guys she is doing a week, and if that doesn't cure me, then I read someone else's detailed review of what he did with her, and that cures me. Originally Posted by Gypsy

Hmm...what a mindfuck that can be.....

Three months advanced rent + deposit with no financial history. If you wanna cut ties cut ties. You don't need his help unless you just want it. When ur done be done.

Three months advanced rent + deposit with no financial history. If you wanna cut ties cut ties. You don't need his help unless you just want it. When ur done be done. Originally Posted by thathottnurse

______________________________ ______________

And you don't think they would need proof of a job? I can certainly start calling around and trying. But someone else asked if he would co sign and I don't think he wants to. He's very protective of his credit rating and wouldn't want to risk it. Although I was in an apartment when he met me, and I was always a month or two ahead on the rent. And he convinced me to leave it and move in with him. But I'm a big girl, it was ultimately my decision. But I just really want my own apartment again! And many of them check your tax returns and credit history now. I have nada in the way of financial records.
And by the way, I appreciate the kind and supportive words about our breakup, and really 14-15 months is longer than many relationships I've had before. The hobby and my profession had nothing to do with why it didn't work. I really was relatively inexperienced, (still am I guess), because I had only been working a year, and I always worked alone, I never had anyone to show me the ropes or tell me easier ways of screening or doing anything. I just kind of figured the job out by trial and error and gut instinct. And reading lots of ECCIE and learning from the smart ladies here.
As for the poster who said when he got feelings for a provider he thought about how many clients she did that week and then read her raunchy reviews; I've always stayed a little UTR and kept pretty much a low profile on this site, I'm not much for posting; (except right now I guess!); and extremely low volume. I would see an average of 3 clients a week, and before he met me, he would see that many providers a week sometimes. Not always, but I never judged him and he never judged me. And he thought the reviews were sexy. One of our favorite things to do was to go to a SC and get a private dance from a girl in the VIP room. We were thinking of going to the LIDO in Dallas before we broke up. We had also planned to visit a provider together, but we never got around to it. So we were actually pretty compatible. I told him from the beginning he could never throw my profession up to me, even when we were arguing, and he never did.

But anyway, he still doesn't want to sign the lease!

... Although I was in an apartment when he met me ... Originally Posted by GingerKatt

This would be a good place to start.