The Catch-22 of screening.

bambino's Avatar
And this is why I titled this thread with the moniker of "Catch-22"

Another old movie reference BTW Anyone watch it?
Basically it involved a set of rules that were nearly impossible for a person to comply with.

Sort of like giving up personal info for some of us.

I COMPLETELY understand the need that we have to remain anonymous.
I COMPLETELY understand the threat of blackmail/extortion/ whatever the wrong use of your data could lead to.

I do appreciate the gentlemen who have seen my side of this, especially the gents who have reached out to me.

There are many other ways of getting verified or meeting with a lady without it Including SA which mostly includes women who would wholeheartedly deny being in the biz.

We all know it's possible, It's just not possible with me.

Although I will say this. There are many people in this thing of ours that know my real life info. Some I've never screened or met with outside of social gatherings.
Why? because of their online presence I have no worries about what they'll do with it.
I trust them.

So yes I do understand the gents side of this. I just hope that some of you now understand my side.

Oh and while we're throwing lists out there.
Aileen Wournos 7 men

Rosemary West 10 girls

Amanda Logue 1 client

Angel West and her pimp (chopped a client to bits)

Juan Carlos Matinez-Herrera & Edwin Faulkner ( I know guys but they were hookers who killed a client)

Bridget Fury ( exact number unknown)

Mary Jane Bricktop ( Unknown number Although she was convicted of Slicing up a man who actually had a ball and chain instead of one hand)

Edith McAlinden ( 3 victims)

Barbara Hoffman ( a client and the man who helped her hide the body)

And the legendary:
Molly Hatchet

Not just the name of a band but rather an infamous woman who chopped the heads off most of her clients, she preyed on lonely men.

Just thought I'd add that list since it's devolved into a he did she did kind of thing.

I'm done with this thread, Thanks for hanging in there with me.
Appreciate the positive responses. Originally Posted by sexymaid_69
I think most understand your POV. It’s the hobby. People will do with what they’re comfortable with doing. To each his own.
We all know it's possible, It's just not possible with me. Originally Posted by sexymaid_69
I think that you've summed this up quite nicely. Often times (or all the time over at TOS) we see grand pronouncements about "this is standard" or somesuch regarding some form of hobby protocol or another. And quite honestly, the screening Catch-22 is on that list. Like you, I'm in the "not possible with me" camp when asked for personally identifiable information when trying to arrange something. And that's okay--if a mutually beneficial situation cannot be reached, everyone just moves on. Thanks for doing this--the signal to noise ratio on this thread is still pretty high, despite the valiant attempt of the usual suspects to derail it.
Gabrielle's Avatar
P.S.- To all providers reading this, I hope you see the restraint several of us are taking when responding to this special person. Originally Posted by Cb2285
Why because when a provider speaks their mind they must be crazy?

Officer noob...
Bambino aka josie Wales is crying because he didn't get invited to the party. Suck him extra good when they finally extend you an invite to the circle jerk. You're almost there! Keep the insults coming.

Please show me one bit of proof that I am a liability to this community?

Oh and officer...what I do and do not do as far MY business is NONE of your fucking business. You're just crying because I called you out on weird PMs and wouldn't see you.

Don't you have a few more cocks to suck to gain your brown ticket to the circle jerk?

P.S. according to a recent poll I did...they like it when you swallow.
Gabrielle's Avatar
Providers should screen to their safety level. Providing your name is the new (resurrected old) norm. Sorry if you don't like it. Move on. You are not the hobbyist for me.
berryberry's Avatar
People like to do illegal things, but they don't like to be caught doing them. In the scenario you mention, she would have his real world name, and mention it to friends for safety. So, if she ends up hurt or dead, the friends simply tell his name to the police so they can find him.
Originally Posted by iliveinhotels
So you are saying all those providers who promise you that your real world info is safe with them and only for their eyes are just handing it out to multiple friends. OK then . . . So much for the confidentiality of your information


Granted, it won't prevent him from hurting her, and he may not be easy to find, but if she has enough information about him, he'll be less likely to do something that could have the police knocking on his door. Originally Posted by iliveinhotels
A criminal is not typically very smart. Most won't think through things like that.

Bottom line, whether the lady has the guys real world name, or vice versa, neither make them safer and protect either of them from robbery or harm.
berryberry's Avatar
Excellent discussion and points by all.

So, is it possible to screen a newbie without references or an online presence without his personal information? If so, what are some ideas to go about doing this?

If not, what are a newbie’s options? This newbie doesn’t want to sacrifice his safety with a lady who doesn’t screen just to be able to type an encounter or have someone that could vouch for him so he can proceed with more verified ladies. Originally Posted by Danner
Well there are tons of us who started and progressed in this hobby without sharing one single shred of real world information.

Lots of bad things can happen to you if you do. From what you posted in your post, sounds like you are married.

Think real hard about what would happen to you if using your realworld info that got back to your wife? or to your job? Think about what if someone used it for nefarious purposes to extort you.

Shoot in another thread a girl on TOS was called out for blackmailing guys

Trust me - you can find good people to see without sharing your real world info. I don't travel that often but once a year or so I may have the occasion to hobby outside this area. I have never been asked for real world info.

Find a reputable girl who will see you without disclosing all your real world info. Use her as a reference to see the next one. And so forth and so on

Only you can protect yourself

PS - I do understand SexyMaid's point of view as well. Just as she understands the guy's POV. Her thread title makes perfect sense.

Bottom line is no one ever asked for real world info in the past - on either side. This is not and has never been the standard. Only you can protect yourself. Think and choose wisely
Gabrielle's Avatar
Bottom line is no one ever asked for real world info in the past - on either side. Originally Posted by berryberry
Sure I did. And I am somebody. (Aren't absolutes fun?)

Pre-internet board days I got full name, phone number, and address before I would go to their HOME.

Anything else you'd like to tell me about my profession?

Screening is the new norm. Just look on Twitter.

Bottom line is no one ever asked for real world info in the past - on either side. This is not and has never been the standard. Only you can protect yourself. Think and choose wisely Originally Posted by berryberry
Sure they did. Elliot Spitzer comes to mind. Lot of folks who dealt with Heidi Fleiss. There are clients who (IMHO foolishly) allow their little brain to do the thinking. It has potential consequences.

It's not standard on either end, regardless of how many times that line is repeated.

I haven't had a problem. But I'm not particularly averse to moving on. It seems (not you) that not everyone on both sides is that carefree about it.
berryberry's Avatar
Sure they did. Elliot Spitzer comes to mind. Lot of folks who dealt with Heidi Fleiss. There are clients who (IMHO foolishly) allow their little brain to do the thinking. It has potential consequences.

It's not standard on either end, regardless of how many times that line is repeated.

I haven't had a problem. But I'm not particularly averse to moving on. It seems (not you) that not everyone on both sides is that carefree about it. Originally Posted by tannana
You know what I meant. I was not being literal and encompassing the whole USA in my statement. I was talking about the standard practice in this area. And you agree with me on that
berryberry's Avatar
Let's call it what it really is, leverage from the threat of blackmail.

A client who parts with that info has to hope that the provider stays inside the lines and uses the power of the threat. But as we have seen, even some very successful providers are willing to cross that line. Originally Posted by burgh1
And we have seen on TOS alone

1. A well respected provider getting guys to prepay and then taking off with all their cash for her retirement
2. A girl calling her pimp or neighbor (depending who you believe) in to rip off a hobbyist
3. An attack by a provider with a hammer
4. Extortion for cancelling an appointment
5. Multiple instances of sharing private communications from guys on twitter

Do you want to live the nightmare of having your personal info in the hands of someone like any of these individuals?
  • El-mo
  • 07-26-2018, 12:18 PM
I will not share any RW info with a provider, but I respect the rights of those who screen. We simply aren't going to see each other. "Strict screening required" doesn't piss me off like "no AA".
And we have seen on TOS alone

1. A well respected provider getting guys to prepay and then taking off with all their cash for her retirement
2. A girl calling her pimp or neighbor (depending who you believe) in to rip off a hobbyist
3. An attack by a provider with a hammer
4. Extortion for cancelling an appointment
5. Multiple instances of sharing private communications from guys on twitter

Do you want to live the nightmare of having your personal info in the hands of someone like any of these individuals? Originally Posted by berryberry

I thought the hammer attack was the provider's bf during appt time as part of an attempted robbery.
I thought the hammer attack was the provider's bf during appt time as part of an attempted robbery. Originally Posted by Atomic Hamster
Not sure you'd want your personal info in his hands either, really.
bambino's Avatar
Not sure you'd want your personal info in his hands either, really. Originally Posted by tannana
Especially him.
Not sure you'd want your personal info in his hands either, really. Originally Posted by tannana
I wouldn't trust either of them with a pair of safety scissors let alone my RWI